#baal nihilo

[inpursuit-of]

darkest sky | blackest sea

I’m sinking. Hell, my head’s going under.

I’d cry for help, but i am utterly alone.

As my head lowers i see under and look below.

I search for the ground where I once stood.

I killed it. and in doing so, myself.

        but where did the water come from?

.

Do I tread here in this Sea?

prolong this desperation as a statement to

       the hollow, wall-less room of my own creation?

I only meant to break open the ceiling.

   I only wanted to see the stars

    but there aren’t any.

.

Screaming to the black I’ll belt out this chorus as a hymn to our age,

before i float, face down, and become the image of its ideal.

[inpursuit-of]

The awakening unto Death.

My lungs were not meant to breath this air.

     I'm choking up my thinning blood.

.

The Peeling has left me a skeleton, barely organs left,

     clinging on. out of habit.

while I'm left stumbling in a dark room.

.

Gazing with the abyss of my sockets once alive with a pale blue,

     eager to greet the sun that set for the last time in what seems 

     a distant foggy memory of a past life.

.

My feet sink into the earth; my fingers grow together.

My body defies me; My mind retreats.

[inpursuit-of]

Peel Back

peel back the years on this calendar;

peel back the layers of my skin.

maybe i’ll find what once lived there.

strip bare to bone to recover the Innocence.

.

Is there any marrow left? Is there life in me yet?

Enough to bleed at the incision?

or as a corpse will i cut myself open,

lay over the flaps and find nothing but 

          machines unplugged.

              layered, soggy plastic.

.

will i even bleed?

would i even feel it?