So occasionally you get the odd CHEAP ASS that can't afford to buy drinks so they drink in the parking lot instead. I'm not going to lie and say I've never done it because back in the day I have brought my own booze into bars or drank outside of them...but I was at least underage when I was drinking outside.
Last night I served a guy only TWO pints during his four hour visit to the bar. I couldn't find him at one point and was positive that he left and that I'd soon have to pay his bill. Finally I caught sight of him and got him to pay me before I lost him again...only this time I saw him he was teetering back and forth obviously WASTED.
I know I didn't get him that way...that only left one explanation he was drinking in the parking lot. When I asked him where the fuck he'd been for so long he told me one of the things you NEVER ever tell your bartender...that you were outside helping your cousin who was PUKING. As bartenders with licences to serve alcohol we are always trying to prevent people from getting that drunk...this also proved to me that they had been slamming drinks down outside.
Finally drunk-ass paid his bill. No tip. Ran outside to find "puking cousin" who was nowhere to be found.
Then some other blonde bimbo relative of drunk-ass who had not been tipping all night either asked me for two more drinks.
I shot her a dirty look and replied with, "I guess."
She gave me money to go grab her change. I "forgot."
Fuck you, you get the service you pay for.