do eddie's death for richie,, give us pain,,
@bathtook (what a terrible challenge--I wanted to see Billâs performance first--here we go... movie spoilers ahead)
As soon as Richie sees the body, flailing helplessly back and forth, his already startled breath catches in his throat and all he can do is stare. His eyes never leave Eddie-Eddie, Eddie--and he doesnât know if heâs shouting or thinking it so loudly that the cavern shakes. Maybe he has the strength to move mountains to reach him, if he believes--somehow that thought catches and he remembers the Paul Bunyan statue again. The paragon of masculinity he will never be towering over him until he willed it away.
He clenches his eyes shut and thinks that if he wills this away, it might be the same. And sure enough a scream escapes Eddieâs lips, and then, a thud. Richie scatters to his feet, the rubble around him pulling him down to his knees again until he finally gets the traction to race across the chamber to the love he had forgotten, remembered, and now couldnât help fearing the loss of. The gaping wound in Eddieâs chest makes Richieâs heart leap into his own, a phantom pain. This time, closing and opening his eyes again doesnât make the wound disappear. âEddie,â he whispers close to the manâs face as his eyes bob in and out of focus, perilously. âHey, hey,â he repeats, muttering nonsense low enough that only he could hear just to keep him awake, to keep him here.Â
Eddieâs eyes lock onto his as if by some magic and heâs thirteen again, the boyâs surprisingly clean feet kicking him in the face with that roguish smile that Eddie reserved for him on his face. He was never uptight like Stan, he just played the part and today, heâs proved again to Richie he is brave at heart, maybe even his personal hero. The man who has never believed in anything, believes in love in that single moment. âRichie, Richie,â And he nods to show that he is there, he is listening with every fiber of his being. âI gotta tell you something.â
Richieâs heart stops in his chest, his eyes soften, and the panic falls away. This moment lays suspended between 1989 and 2016 and despite the setting, Richie thinks itâs just about perfect. He knows before the words escape Eddieâs lips what he will say because heâs felt it since he picked up the arcade token at the movie theater, or maybe even as soon as he picked up the phone and puked his stupid guts out. âI fucked your mother.â Those are the words everyone else in the room hears but mostly, they donât know how much four vulgar words can mean to Richie âtrash mouthâ Tozier. Because what he hears is âI love you,â and really, some of them get the gist as well. He sees understanding dawn on Bevâs face and she gives him a small smile.
While the others move on to become the heroes, he stays with Eddie, tragic and terrified. This love is over before it has begun, unless--as they stem the tide against the fucking clown, he clenches his eyes closed and repeats âgo away, go away, go away,â in his mind before he marches into the fray again, armed with a new understanding that they will win and Eddie will live and they will be together because he believes itâs the truth. And once the fuckerâs heart has been crushed into a thousand floating pieces, he returns to Eddie with a triumphant look on his face quite sure the wound is healed and his eyes are open and a smile is on his face.
Sure, the blood is still on his shirt. Richieâs stomach sinks and his mind changes pace âyouâre ok, youâre ok, youâre ok,â becomes his new mantra. He places a hand on his shoulder. Eddie doesnât respond, not even when Richie shakes him. The panic is back, the sick rising in his throat again but they just defeated an ancient evil by believing and so--Richie stays there, eyes glued to Eddieâs own, wide and petrified but unresponsive. Why donât the others believe? He wonders as Bev steps closer to him and calls his name.
The bile melts into anger at the strained sadness in her voice. None of them believe! âWhat?â He snaps, before turning resolutely back to Eddie, his mantra still pounding in a steady rhythm at the back of his mind. âWe can still help him, we can still help him,â he begins to repeat as if he can conjure their shared belief by speaking the mantra aloud but there are hands all over him now, grasping at his shoulders and he pulls Eddie into his arms. He feels strong enough to carry the whole gad damn cavern out and then theyâll see, theyâll see heâs just resting his eyes and the hospital can patch him up!Â
He uses all his strength to heft Eddie into his arms, running a hand through his hair, down his back, feeling every inch of him for one last time. His chest buzzes with the words Eddie left for him, as seemingly incomplete as they were. After a few moments, he loses the battle against the others tugging at him. He strains, pauses one last time to plant a soft kiss to Eddieâs grimy forehead. âI love you too,â he whispers too low for anyone to hear over the crackle of the cavern caving in around them.Â
















