#because texas

[leatherlaceandblades]

[initiala]

so as I was driving home last night it was The Very Particular Kind Of Dark that country roads in Texas get in the between-lands and rolling ranches

and then I see red letters appear out of the darkness as I crest a hill:

Need Pie?

Pie Vending Machine Available 24/7

and it was on the OTHER SIDE OF THE HIGHWAY and Texas is NOTORIOUS for having REALLY STRICT ONE-WAY ONLY ROADS so there was no way I could go out and experience THE PIE VENDING MACHINE

[generallemarc]

Presidents as foods

Clinton-Waffle

Obama-Ear of corn(get it?)

Trump-Orange

Biden-Ice cream cone.

Anyone got anything for W. Bush?

[gossamarnie]

Have to give a shoutout to the man I saw this weekend who pimped his ride out to look like a Tonka truck:

[prettyboishin]

Tornado sirens: WOOOOOOOOOOOO

Me, glances up from phone, sitting on the front porch:

Me, propping feet on picnic table: Eh.

[merlotdrama]

it's gotten to that part of summer where after every ride I have to take a minute to sit and cool down otherwise I'll feel like I'll pass out from heat exhaustion :)))))))

[melodiousramblings]

So our home phone has a caller ID... And the caller ID has a voice, so it literally tells you who’s calling. Someone just called and I listened to the caller ID...

“Call from... Texas.”

...Texas. The entire state of Texas is calling my house.

[elizadunc]

Texas is weird, y'all

I love how there's this big thing going around about how the south says Y'all'd've. But what I've experienced is that it's much more of a Y'all'd'a. You all would a. So not only are we shortening the sentence way more than it should be. But we're shortening the shortened.