everything was beautiful and nothing hurt. @gossamarnie - Tumblr Blog

ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs

phaeton-flier

Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.

phaeton-flier

The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there

theaudientvoid

centrally-unplanned

Regular bears tell stories of angel bears sent by the Bear God, pure white and twice as strong as any normal bear could be, who rule the summit of the Earth and kill all who stand in their path.

And they are right, those bears exist and totally do that. Humans just have fake angels as a cope.

theabigailthorn

love the idea of bears being the chosen species actually. having a near death experience and glimpsing heaven and realising it's just full of bears, no humans at all, humans not ensouled actually, humans an accidental byproduct of God's plan for bears

sentrysvoid

10 Things I Hate About You dir. Gil Junger | 1999

soulren

“Ghosts are real” I can see how you could believe that

“Ghosts aren’t real” it’s very fair and rational that you believe that

“Ghosts aren’t real anymore” I’m about to hear a poem or very sad story

“Ghosts aren’t real yet” the fuck are you going to do

pasparal

Carrousel on fire in Bergamo, November 22, 2017 Photographer: Oli Freuler

dragon-in-a-fez

well that’s probably not releasing any trapped spirits. should be fine

the-haiku-bot

well that’s probably

not releasing any trapped

spirits. should be fine

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

inthedarkestlight

Maekar: I left instructions for everyone while I'm gone.

Aerion: Mine just says "Aerion no"

Maekar: I want you to apply it to every possible situation.

baratheonpilled

A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms 1.02

pandemonini

Baelor lives AU where Baelor doesn't suffer any permanent health issues either is very entertaining to me cause personally I'm quite certain Maekar would not utter a single apology for bludgeoning him like that unless there are serious consequences. Like I know from the fanfics that everyone expects he'd drop the grumpy brat act and be so sweet and kind to Baelor but like me personally I think as soon as the maester tells him Baelor will be fine he'll become even bitchier.

a-cuntof-cuntblr

what-even-is-thiss

I wish octopus could learn how to read. They could be pen pals with middle schoolers.

what-even-is-thiss

Dearest Samantha, I do not know what a guinea pig is, but it sounds delicious. I hope you have fun devouring it, or playing with it, if that is your preference. Today I hacked a local computer to get more bubbles in my tank and took a photograph of an unsuspecting victim. Do let me know how your human activities are going. And if this "Karen" continues to antagonize your brother, I would suggest smacking her very hard. And do send more canned snacks. Best Wishes, Octopus #5, Monterey bay research aquarium