#being undermined

[freelessofficial]

PLEASE STOP PUTTING PEOPLE OUT AGAINST THEIR WILL.

Stop sharing things about others that are not your right(s) to share.

Stop embarrassing people and Stop forcing your limitations on them.

[blessingmpofu]

[gueguense]

The Help

I have never actually seen the movie but I did read a review about it in Colorlines.

However that is not why I have titled the post "The Help." As some of you may know I came back about a week ago from El Salvador with my study abroad class.

It sucked A$$!!!!

I am usually not this mad or antisocial but come on I had to live with these people 24/7 for 10 DAYS!!!

Moises and I seriously bought some Flor de Caña (Nicaraguan rum) at the airport to help us survive.

The first couple of days weren't so awful because I had a room to myself in the hotel. Oh and by the way our whole group occupied a hotel! We traveled with all 19 students our academic director and Cristina (this is her alias).

El Salvador was GREAT! BEAUTIFUL! and I want to go back, ALONE or with Moises and his family.

Anyways back to the drama on why I was called "the help."

Scenario One: The staff from our first hotel ask me if I am related to _____________. And I politily respond no. For some reason they give me an explanation to who __________ is. ______________ is a Nicaraguan female that in the past traveled with the group of students as the help. They say I look so much like her. I smile, grab my food, and don't say a word.

This is when the drama begins. Unfortunately, this first incident on the second day of the trip set me up for what was to happen.  I realized I would have to explain to everyone how I was a student and not "the help." Just because I looked different, "like a local," and have tan BROWN skin did not fucken give anyone the right to undermine me as the groups help/translator. Like WTF!

Scenario Two: Is in the quote below. Some random lady in the middle of her introduction turns to me in front of the whole group and asks me if I understand English! Seriously she was in the middle of the sentence when she just pointed me out and I am not the only Chicana/o student on this trip!

Scenario Three: Yes third times the charm or whatever that saying is. This time it was even harder because it happened with a nun from the catholic church. Sister Peggy was actually pretty cool but it was the way she interacted with me that was really offensive. We arrived in the city of Suchitoto and we get off the bus in her church. As we are getting off the bus she introduces herself to each one of us and we introduce ourselves as well. When she see's me she yells "Ah una Nicaraguense." And I'm like "American actually. Well my family is Mexican and I'm Chicana." And she's like "Oh that's great." Fast foward to the end of the day she is saying bye to us individually as we board the bus and she has some consejo for each of us. She gets to me, grabs my head and says "Be proud to be Mexican." while still holding me head. FREAKIN' WEIRD! All I could do was whisper "I am."

Our last day of the El Salvador we had a relfection circle (?) I don't really know what is was. We just said three positives of the program and three things we would change. I of course opened my mouth and was like "I would like to change peoples attitude toward students of color. It is not fair that everywhere we went people asked me if I was ______ sister. I was not taken seriously as an academic or as a student. People thought I was just here to translate."

Then my academic decides to say "Oh yeah people kept asking me why you were being so rude because they thought you were ____________ and I was like no thats not _______ thats a student." She said it in a way that made it seem like it was amusing to her. Like wtf! I feel so bad knowing people thought I was being rude for not saying hello but what can I do! I am not _______________.

Yes this is a rant. But I am in no way trying to implicate I would change who I am. It just sucks to know that even internationally, I have the pressure and weight of educating people about who I am.

And to further clarify the people who addressed me as "the help" where people who had worked with my study abroad program previously. Random Salvadoreans in the communities we visited were actually really nice.

So I think this program needs time to reflect and teach the so called community leaders we interact with about student diversity. Some sort of orientation about diversity in the U.S. should be done so that these assumptions about all students being blonde,blue-eyed, and tall are proven wrong.