Would you mind writing an imagine where your band is on tour with AA and you’re hanging out with them when Cam jokes about you being fat, so you laugh it off, but then go throw up your food, but Ben hears you and comforts you, accidentally letting it slip that he loves you? Thank you in advance xx
Sorry if it’s short, I hope you like it and I guess it has a small trigger warning
Munching on pizza, myself and my band chilled with Asking Alexandria. We had just performed a big show and to be honest, we were shattered and starving. So we ordered pizza and here we are, in some members of Asking’s hotel room. I’ve pretty much had a whole pizza to myself, but I tried my best to not let it bother me. Deep inside, I knew it was bad for my weight and I would probably pay for it later.
"Hey, Y/N, want to trade slices?" Ben, Asking’s guitarist asked me. Since this your we practically became bestfriends considering we spend so much time with each other. Maybe, just maybe, I had a little crush on him. Playfully, I smile and squint my eyes at him. But before I can respond, Cameron, the bands other guitarist says something.
"Pft, like Y/N would need anymore pizza. Have you seen how much she’s eaten, she’s had enough for a whale! God, you’re going to get even more fat soon." He smirks. "Even more fat?” I repeat, raising my eyebrows at him. “Well yeah, c’mon look at you, you’re not the skinniest bird ever, are you?” He tilts his head before bursting out laughing. I see Ben giving Cameron an uneasy look, he knows. “Mhm.” I laugh humourlessly and nod my head. But that was it, I was triggered.
A few minutes drag on by, and the word fat echoes in my lonely mind. “Excuse me.” I mutter, standing up from my seat. “Wait.” Ben brushes his hand across my arm, but I ignore it and simply walk off. My room was just across the hall, I could go there to be on my own and do my business.
I shove the key into the door and hurtle in; I can’t wait to get this over and done with. Replaying in my head is Cameron’s words: "how much she’s eaten", "had enough for a whale", "even more fat". They continue to taunt me as I kneel down beside the toilet in my bathroom. I felt like like a pig. Disgusted by myself and the way that I’ve eaten. He’s right, I had way too much. Enough for a whole ocean of whales. Maybe that’s all I was: a big, fat, ugly, good-for-nothing whale.
Soon enough, I was hurling up my dinner for this night. It poured out of my mouth into the toilet. I was vile and gross, I knew that. But it had to be done. If that’s what made me skinny, I will do it until I’m skin and bone. Destroying myself to be beautiful… Ha, what a mess.
I flush the toilet. Grabbing a towel, I push it to my mouth as I sit up against the bath. For some reason, I felt better. Better about myself, better about my weight, better about my looks. But I felt terrible, too. Terrible that I make myself do this, terrible that this is the only way I can be skinny, terrible that this makes me feel pretty.
"Y/N.." I hear Ben, and a knock on my bathroom door. It startled me slightly, but I just shrug against the bath. "Go away." I murmur. "Y/N, I know what you’re doing in there, open this door." He orders. He’s right - Ben does know. One night I broke down to him and told him everything. About all the horrible things about me. Yet, he’s still stayed by my side. Something I myself can’t understand. "Ben, I don’t want to." I whine like a five year old. "Y/N, things aren’t going to get any better if you don’t open this door." He replies sternly. "How do you expect things to get better if you won’t let me help?" He adds, his tone softening. It’s that what got to me. He was right: things can’t get better if you don’t let somebody help you. “Fine.” I mumble, slouching up from my position. I unlock it slowly. Swinging the door open is Ben, who’s arms rush around me.
"Oh, Y/N." He sighs. "I’m sorry." I whimper frailly. "I know I promised I wouldn’t, but what Cam said it just… It just didn’t help at all." I continue. Hushing me, he leads me out of the bathroom and to the main area of my hotel room. He sits the both of us on the couch and looks at me. "What Cam said - it was wrong you know." He mutters, trying to catch eye contact. "Sure." I whisper sarcastically. "Y/N, I mean it." He says, taking my hand and attention. "You are not fat. You’re far from it, don’t ever think you are just because of some rambling dick.” Ben continues. I shrug and nod my head half heartedly.
"Y/N, I mean it. You’re beautiful." He says reassuringly. "You’re perfect, every part of you is perfect. Every inch of your body is just perfect. You in general is just perfect, alright? Don’t let anybody tell you any different. Because to me, you’re the definition of perfection." His hand grazes my cheek, making me blush timidly. "Just, every part of me wants and needs every part of you to feel complete, you just complete me Y/N. I don’t want you thinking you’re anything but perfect. You’re the blood in my veins, I need you so god damn much, I love you." He breathes. Filling with glee, my eyes blink in astonishment. "I, I’m sorry, it just slipped.." He mutters awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck.
"But by all means, it’s true." He shrugs his shoulders and tries to smile. "Really?" I ask in disbelief, heart pounding. "…Yeah." He sucks in his cheeks smiling, and drops eye contact. "I, I’m sorry." I adds, frowning with the same smile lingering over his lips. "Don’t be." I bite my lip and lean closely towards him. My arms coil around his neck whilst his hands venture at my waist. Softly, he pulls me in for a breathtaking kiss.
