#secondbest
Requests here
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seen from United States

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#secondbest
Requests here
I want you to be that happy forever.
“can you do a fake text where justin hasnt heard from y n in a few days and gets really sad and worried thanks”
Requests here
He chose Wendy
‘please can you do a fake text where Justin confesses his feelings for yn but she doesn't feel the same way?’
Requests here
Here we go
‘could you do a fake text where yn tries to help Justin but it backfires’
Requests here
3 New Here
"Hi baby, how did it go?" I open up the door to the Lamborghini and slide in quickly trying to tame my eagerness and make sure I didn't look too starstruck. "You know work is wo-" I'm interrupted by a pair of soft lips and cool metal. My hands tease the hair that rests at the nape of his neck and with a groan he leans forward, his lips bruising mine until.... "Ow!" I hold my bottom lip with a careful hand and pull my fingers away to find blood. At least it was red in this dimension too. "Fuck, babe! I'm sorry I forgot to take this shit out of my mouth, shit" I use the back of my hand to wipe away the crimson stain and shake my head to let him know that I'm alright. "So your day was good? The magazine is going to launch on time?" I nod and take the time to examine him in entirety as he reverses the car with careful precision. He has short slightly spiked hair, tanned skin, and his skin is decorated with a series of tattoos not unlike the Bieber from my time. "SoSo?" I continue to look at him totally unaware of the fact that he'd been calling my name for some time. "Huh?" He grins and runs a red light. I rest my hands on top of my seatbelt. "I was asking you how long you had for lunch" his hand reaches over and covers mine before lifting it to his lips. My insides twist with anxiety and anticipation. "Oh, I cancelled." Justin lets out a dramatic gasp, still holding my hand and squeezing tighter with each turn of the sports car. "South West you fucking rebel" I shrug and give a small smile. His eyes leave the road and I gasp a little when the icy blue irises focus on me. "What ever will Nana Kris say?" I shrug again and hold up my phone showing him the missed calls and texts from Kris. "It's not to late to change your mind" I shake my head and lean into him. He smells like expensive aftershave and rich leather. "I'll take my chances," I say with a sigh when another call from Kris lights up my phone. "This rebel version of you gets me hot babe" my cheeks burn and I cross my legs and silence my dirty thoughts. He's not your boyfriend! Justin's hand slips to rest on my thigh, squeezing it lightly before rubbing it up and down the expanse of my bare leg. Though technically he is... "W-where are we going?" My voice comes out squeaky and the way that he keeps his hands on my leg doesn't help. "I'm not too busy today. Want to order some Thai and eat it at my place?" "That sounds good, I can hide from my mom and Kris" "I'm harboring a fugitive huh?" I nod and hang my right arm out the window enjoying the Calabasas air. It sure wasn't the humid hell that was Houston, Texas. Justin speeds through a neighborhood and I clutch my seat when he zooms through a slowly opening gate, nearly ramming into it. "You suck at driving" I admonish. He only laughs and pulls into his garage. The house could almost rival Kimye's but I'm sure that they had a few thousand square feet on him. "You always shit on my driving SoSo. You and Blue constantly fuck with me about it. Really brings a guy down." Fuck me. I know Blue Ivy Carter. Fuck X 2 I probably know Beyoncé. "I'll text Sherí and tell her to pick up the Thai" a variation of trap and pop music booms through his grandiose house and I'm slightly impressed when he mumbles, "Made that track up this morning." He tosses his keys onto a glass table before walking into the kitchen mumbling about Rosé and Corona. I nod still focusing on the rifts of music and start to dance to the beat, it's contagious. "This would be so much better if you would dance around in some panties" I turn around and see Justin carrying a champagne flute and a beer bottle I reach for the champagne and down it. You don't know how long this will last Lane. Might as well take advantage. "How long before Sherí shows up?" Justin sips on his beer and moves steadily closer to me. Now the both of us are swaying to his music. "In this traffic? Minutes, hours, and if I say so... Days" his hand slips into the back pocket of my jeans and squeezes roughly. I'm so surprised that I lurch forward on my tiptoes and slosh a little Rosé onto his face. I take his beer bottle and my glass to set them on the table before apologizing. "I'm so sorry!" I try to pull away and search for something to wipe him off with but his hold on my ass doesn't budge. "Clean me up baby," his voice is hoarse and it does things to the area between my legs. He takes his index finger and taps it twice onto my still split lip and with a slight blush I catch the hint. "You sure you don't want a napkin? Way more effective tha-" he adds another hand to my ass and massages it so I'm completely flush against him. With a sudden bout of what I will now call 'South West Courage' I lick the droplets of champagne from his chiseled jawline, moaning for added effect. "Mmm. Tastes better than from the bottle" I whisper, trailing my tongue from his cheekbone to his ear. "That's it," I'm picked up and shoved onto the back of his couch, my legs locked right over his ass and his burgeoning erection resting against my thigh. "Sherí-" "My name is Justin baby," I slap at his chest and he laughs before attacking my neck with bruising kisses. My mind damn near goes blank when he slips a hand down the front of my jeans and into my panties. "Justin," my head falls back when a long finger strokes through my drenched folds and his thumb presses on my clit like an elevator button. "Stay over tonight?" He was so clearly asking South, but I, Lane held some reservations. Was I really going to sleep with Justin Bieber? When he slips a finger inside of me my mind makes itself up immediately. "Yes," and then I'm coming with a rasping cry, pulling him closer by his chains and nearly sobbing into his shirt. The doorbell rings when he starts to grind against me and I'm about to tell him to forget about the food when my stomach lets out a heinous growl. "Are you not eating again So?" Again? I shake my head and give a confident smile. "I skipped breakfast. Didn't want to look bloated for the shoot" I'd heard Kim... Mom say that on an episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians and it sounded like something her offspring would say. Justin shakes his head with a disapproving glance before walking to his door. We eat the food straight from the cute little boxes with chopsticks and canned soda in his media room. "How much did Kale get paid for this? I'm asking for a friend" Justin says as my cousin, on my mother's side, appears on the big screen. As Katniss Everdeen. "I mean Jennifer Lawrence made about 10 million so I'm assuming Kale made the same" "Jennifer Lawrence?" I nod and then I want to slap myself. What if she doesn't exist here or something? "Jennifer Lawrence the comedienne? What does she have to do with The Hunger Games?" I shake my head and shrug. "Sorry. What's in this soda?" Justin laughs and tosses a fortune cookie at my face. I'm about to toss three at him when my phone rings. North's face popping up on the screen. "SoSo can we come to Justin's?" I put her on speaker so he can be a part of the conversation. "Come to Justin's for what?" Justin's interest is peaked and he leans over. "To smoke obviously. You know how mom gets when the house smells like dank and dad won't be there to defend us because he just left for Vienna" Justin shrugs and tosses a thumbs up, "I was trying to bang your sister tonight, but I guess you can show up" north makes a noise of disgust. "You're so gross Bizzle. Keep it in your pants alright?" "No promises. Who are you bringing?" " Brookie, Blue, maybe a few of the Jolie- Pitts should I invite Apple?" Justin shakes his head violently. "Um, not this time" "Didn't think so. How about Penelope and her vine buds?" "They're always lit" says Justin and I shrug, "Sure, why not" "I'll bring drinks I know how OCD Bizz is about people in his fridge" Justin nods in agreement and I roll my eyes. "Okay see you later?" "Mhmm. I'll make sure the camera crew stays with mom and the aunties" So KUWTK is a thing here. "Invite Kylie and Kendall" "They might be busy, but I'll ask" we say our goodbyes and then Justin crawls over to me and presses me into the plush carpet of his movie room. "We have some time before everyone starts showing up why don't W-" " DJ DASHING IN THE HOUSE!!!!" Justin rolls off of me with a sigh and runs a hand through his hair. "Bobby I told you that key was for emergencies only!" Justin calls and I realize that my cousin is walking up the stairs. "It is an emergency! I'm bored as fuck!" "Gigi said you were in Greece with Kale" Bobby puts a finger to his lips and makes a shh sound. "Nah. Pops is in Greece, Kale and I slept in and had to lie to Ya girl" I shake my head, "She counted on us B" I say slipping into my older cousin role easily. " I'll send her a flower arrangement. Roses right?" I shrug and scoot over when he plops himself down next to Justin and I. "We should have a party tonight" "North beat you to it, she's making calls." "Alright bet." Then he snatches some Thai food and starts to stuff his face. "You are such a pig" "Takes one to know one West" Justin smacks him on the back of his curly head before we all share a laugh.
New Here ( Possibly new fic)
I’ve got enough on my plate but…….. I have like two chapters done for that new fic called AM…. Would anyone be interested in reading this if I wrote more? It’s called ’ New Here’
*Basically it's an alternate timeline in which Kris Jenner had Kendall and Kylie even later so that they're the same age as Kim's children.* Lane Leilio Wakes up to find out that she is now South West. The second eldest daughter of Kim and Kanye West. In addition to her newfound celeb status she uncovers that her boyfriend is megastar Justin Bieber.
“Wake up babe, you’ve got at least ten shoots today” shoots? Did I forget to turn in my yearbook photo essay? The voice is vaguely familiar, though distant in my cloudy mind.
“Ugh,” I moan my head is pounding and my stomach is churning.
“Babe, wake up your dad has the driver out front it’s rude to keep him waiting.” I let out a short laugh. It’s probably my friend Delaney playing a trick on me. A fucking driver. Ha.
“How fucked up did we get last night Del?” My head is smacked with a heavy ass pillow and I sit up immediately ready to throw down.
“Del what the-” my heart drops all the way to my ass and my mouth falls to my toes.
“Kim Kardashian” the reality television goddess herself looks at me with a wry smile pulling the pillow she assaulted me with away from my body.
“Mom works too you know,” she says with an eye roll and its then that I notice the slight difference in her face. The small crow’s feet wrinkles around her almond shaped eyes and the tight smile lines surrounding her mouth.
“How late were you out last night Soso?” Who? Kim Kardashian asks her gaze suspicious and quizzical.
“I… I um…” She rolls her eyes again and lets out a huff of air.
“Do daddy and I need to keep tabs on you like we do for Nori?”
“What?” She gets off of my bed and walks over to a grand vanity it’s then that I take the opportunity to look around my bedroom. Gone were the Jonas brother posters and sports participation medals, instead the walls were covered in photos of myself… Though not quite myself.
“Kim-” She turns around with an icy glare and holds up a finger as she taps away on her phone.
“I’m texting daddy. I don’t know what’s been up with you lately South West, but it needs to stop you have obligations, responsib-” I look up at the glass chandelier that hangs pendulously in the middle of the bedroom… My bedroom.
“Sorry Ki- mom. I’ve just been super stressed out from all of the… Shoots” she pauses. A long nail poised over the next set of letters before she sighs and gives up.
“You’re seventeen. I get it, it’s a lot to process, but Nori is doing the same thing and she’s flourishing under the pressure you can do the same I-”
“You’re so right Ki- mom. What time is my first shoot?”
“SoSo. Nana Kris has your schedule you know this. Should I call a doctor?” Her face twists in concern and I shake my head reaching across for my cellphone. Instead of my usual cracked down the middle phone was an iPhone 6 S shining and rose gold. The stuff of WeHeartIt dreams.
“I’ll call Nana Kris right now okay? Leave so I can get dressed?” I bat my eyes at her and she sighs before kissing me on the forehead.
“Ten minutes!” She calls before moving out to the hallway I nod absently and open the notes app on my new phone.
“Oh and honey?” I look up from my frantic search and gulp.
“Yes?” Kim peaks her head into the bedroom again and gives a cheeky smile,
“Call Justin, he’s been bugging me all day”
“Will do!” I lie. Who the fuck was Justin. Kim leaves again and I type down what I know in my notes app.
1.) My name is Lane Leilio and I am eighteen years old.
2.) I am in an alternate dimension.
3.) Kim Kardashian Called me South West.
4.) South West is a stupid name and Kim Kardashian is my mother.
5.) My real mother is Jennifer Leilio, an accountant.
6.) Kanye West is my father.
7.) My real father is unknown.
8).
Before I can type the eighth fact a beautiful girl with curly hair down to her back walks into my room and launches herself onto the bed.
“What’d you do to mom? She’s pissed” no fucking way.
“North?” She raises and eyebrow and looks at me with concern,
“South?” I gulp and shake my head.
“Nothing. Um you know how she gets” Notth accepts my explanation and sucks happily on a lollipop.
“Bieber was blowing up my phone all morning. You ignoring him?” The lollipop is moved to the inside of her cheek.
“Who?” My heart stops as I wait for confirmation.
“Justin. Your boyfriend? Literally texting and calling me the whole day, pick up your phone he thinks you’re like, dead.”
“Okay. Okay. Get out I have to get dressed” she pulls the lollipop out of her mouth and kisses me on the cheek.“
"No more parties in LA Soso” she sings before leaving. I go back to my list.
8.) North West is my sister.
9.) North West is not a baby.
10.) not only am I in an alternate reality. I’m in an alternate timeline.
I glance over to the nightstand next to my bed and she a picture of North, Kendall, Kylie and I all decked out in Balmain. Olivier Rousteng himself in the middle of us. Kendall and Kylie appear to be the exact same age as North and I. Which probably explained why Kim looked so much older.
11.) Justin Bieber.
Another photo frame in the room shows Justin Bieber and I locked in a steamy looking kiss. Is hands grabbing my bikini clad but as we made out on a boat.
12.) Bieber is my boyfriend.
13.) ^^^^holy fuck.
14.) ^^ I am never drinking alcohol again.
15.) where is here?
16.) Do I want to leave?
17.) Did I finish my Calc. homework?
SEVEN Chapter Nine
"We don't have to stay for the party if you aren't up to it Anya" Justin tells me as his security detail ushers us to the limo. "Yes you two do!" Kylie yells and I had forgot for a moment that she was following us, "Yeah we have to! I haven't been to a party in ages!" I say as I climb into the limo. Justin slides in and before he can shut the door so does Kylie. "You're honestly trying to talk your way out of my after party?" My eyes widen and I look at Justin. "Your after party?" I ask in surprise and Kylie nods before ripping off her long black wig. Justin and I sit staring at her and her wig cap. " Aren't you guys going to change?" I look at Justin and raise my eyebrows, he gives a sheepish shrug. "I was hoping you'd want to dip out and maybe go home for some..." His hand travels to my thigh and his voice drops to a lower, sexy tone. "I thought you wanted me to meet your guy friends, or do you not have any?" I tease his face burns a bright red. "He doesn't want to share you. Bizzle is so fucking possessive man" Bizzle? I raise an eyebrow again and Justin looks like he wants to strangle Kylie who reaches into her massive bag and pulls out a sleek black box. "What the fuck is that?" Justin asks and I notice that his hand still hasn't left my thigh. Kylie waves him off and opens up the box. "It's my ponytail extension" she says in a 'duh' tone before flipping the long strand of straight black hair and shaking it. With skilled fingers she puts it on top of her head and shakes it out a few more times. "See? It's pretty cute right?" I nod and then ask a question that had been circling my mind for awhile. "Am I dressed alright? For your party?" She does a once over and then reaches to pat my knee. "You look amazing Anya, but you'll get overheated and uncomfortable so quick. Trust me one time I partied in a Balmain dress an-" "so should I take her home so she can change?" Justin wonders and Kylie fixes her ponytail before shaking her head. "Nah I have like three after party dresses, we're probably the same size, she might be smaller, but she's still gonna look hot" I smile and lean against Justin who starts to play with my curled hair. "Yeah loosen up those curls Bieber because it's about to get hella wild." Kylie Jenner After Party The outfit that Kylie lends me is breathable, elegant, and fun at the same time and I love it. When I come back from changing Justin is in the VIP area with his shirt off and his golden chains glistening against the pale skin of his tatted chest. He stands up and reaches for my hand and I take it eagerly, ignoring the stares of the boys that surround him. "Who's this Biz?" A guy asks as Justin settles me quite comfortably on his lap he plays with my hand for a little bit and for a moment I think he's forgotten the question. "I'm Anya" I tell the group though one leering boy in particular makes me wish I'd said Seven. "Hi Anya," they chorus like they're in an AA meeting and that makes me giggle. "She's so cute Biz. You're so cute Anya" says the guy closest to Justin and I smile and thank him when he reaches to shake my hand, "I'm Alfredo. You can call me Fredo though" I nod "Nice to meet you Fredo" he blushes and takes a sip of his perspiring Corona. Justin offers me a sip of his whiskey but I turn it down. There were some yummy fruity looking drinks at the bar that I was dying to taste. "We playing the name game?" A dude across from me wonders and I shrug and nod as a chuckle rumbles through Justin's chest. "Okay so from left to right here we go. You ready Anya?" I nod again and he points at himself, "I'm Za. That's Ryan, next to him is his boyfriend Chaz th-" "Fuck you Za!" "Yeah Za fuck off man it's not funny anym-" "Then we got Cody" the boy whom Gigi had gone to sit with at the award show gives a brief wave before going back to his cigar. "My boy Tyga" a man with enough tats to rival Justin's throws up a deuce and shoots a friendly wink before downing his booze. "Last but definitely not least we got the plug, Dante" the last guy, the one who'd been eyeing me hardcore, offers a slow appraising look one I had seen time and time again on the face of my clients. (Dante is played by my other baby daddy Quincy Brown) "What you hit Anya?" Dante asks and his voice is smooth with a rolling accent of some kind. "She isn't about that life Te leave her alone" Justin scolds but Dante continues to stare at me, "Oh that's my bad Biz. Baggie on me tonight aight?" Justin coughs in uncomfortable intervals and seems almost too relieved when Kendall and Kylie enter the section. "Hello boys, and Anya" Kendall says with a grand wave and then I'm being yanked off of Justin's lap bye Kylie's Cartier clad wrist. "Dance with us Anya!" Kylie insist and when I peer behind the two sisters I notice that Gigi had come thru as well. She does a tiny shimmy and a Coke hither motion and I turn to Justin. "Go have fun baby. I need a smoke break anyways" I lean down and capture his lips In a kiss before being led away by the girls. "You and Biz have totally done it!" Kendall shouts over the music and I throw my head back and laugh, "What makes you so sure?" "He's all over you!" Gigi shouts dancing languidly next to me. "I thought he was going to tell you you couldn't come dance with us!" Kylie yells and I shake my head, "Justin isn't like that! He's really lax!" Kylie and Kendall give each other a lol before starting to dance again. "Question!" I'm the one yelling this time and Gigi responds with a loud, "Answer!" "Why do you guys call him Bizzle?" Kendall smirks and Kylie mimics it before they encircle me to a quieter portion of the dance floor. "So remember when he was such a good boy, rocking the bowl cut and mismatched shit on the red carpet?" I nod even though I'm totally unaware. I hadn't ever followed him or his career. "So after he and Selena broke up he did a complete 180" Kylie continues and I lean in, intrigued. "Tattoos, drinking, smoking" his tattoos were all sexy as hell in my opinion and he always seemed to drink in moderation around me of course, and the smell of cigarette smoke and some cannabis never really bothered me. " he's just reinvented himself," "Sexier music" "Sexier clothes" "Bizzle." I nod and digest the new info. "You're good for him Anya" Gigi says sincerely and Kendall nods in rapid agreement, "How can you be so sure?" "Because he's never introduced us to a girl he has around" "Never" Kylie promises and Kendall holds up her pinky with a solemn expression. Never. - Hey guys there's going to be some pretty serious drug usage in this story so read at your own risk!-
SEVEN Chapter 6
"You hustled me!" Justin shouts jovially before throwing his pool stick to the floor. I place a hand over my heart and lean over the gold plated pool table and grab the winning 8 ball. "I did not! How dare you make such accusations Mr. Bieber!" "Why I oughta..." He races to my side of the table and scoops me up from the waist before I can run away from him. "Who knew that you were such a sore loser?" " Oh Justin, I've never been too good at pool" he mocks and I struggle to get out of his impressively strong grasp. "I do not sound like that" "Oh, but you do." I begin to kick my legs and struggle until finally he lets me go, plopping me onto one of his couches with a 'thump'. "I am so bored!" He exclaims before walking to the front of the couch and sitting on my legs. "Do you treat all your lady friends like this?" I joke and he leans close to my face and nuzzles my nose with his, "Only the ones that I like" he admits and I wiggle my legs to distract him from the blush on my face. "This outfit is dope by the way" he plays with the cute little hat I'd gotten from an upscale thrift shop we'd passed. He begins trailing his fingers to the brilliantly white shirt and then to my high waisted jeans. He'd let me buy this outfit and this outfit only. "I used to go thrifting with my mom all the time, I mean of course being in Oklahoma the thrift returns weren't so glamorous but they got me through high school." "My mom and I didn't have much money growing up so we used to thrift too" his voice and entire demeanor becomes nostalgic and I stop wiggling my body to place a hand on his lightly stubbled cheek. "Your mom had you when she was pretty young right?" "I thought you didn't read the magazines" he teases, lifting the atmosphere a tiny bit. "I don't, but the only thing to do in a small town is gossip" "Big towns too" he adds and I continue to run at his cheek when I notice that he's leaning into my touch. "My mom had me when she was fifteen" I say and for a moment an image of my mom flits across my memory and my heart wrenches. I hadn't talked to my mother in nearly four years. "Do you miss her?" I shake my head "I told you I didn't miss any of my family while we were on the jet" he nods and takes my hand away from his cheek and holds it in his. "I miss my mom" our fingers are laced together and I look up from them to study his brown eyes. "Where is she?" I wonder and he lets out a long, weary sigh. "I bought her a place in Hawaii. We aren't on the greatest terms at the moment." Being so close to him allowed me to examine the tired lines surrounding his eyes and the bluish bags that could only be seen in a closeup. Justin Bieber is tired. Justin Bieber is exhausted. And nobody seems to care. Except for you. "Get up" I command taking my hand out of his and patting his thigh before standing up with a loud stretch and yawn. "Where are we going?" Justin asks in confusion, I grab his hands and attempt to pull him off of the couch but his body is much too stationary and I am much too small. "Somewhere sunny-" "We're in California..." "Smart ass. Somewhere not so..." I motion around his dark living room and he gets the gist and stands up when I pull at his hands again. "Ever been to In N out burger?" I shake my head and he rummages around in his jean pocket to retrieve his keys. Once we're out of the LA traffic Justin zooms his Ferrari into the drive thru Lane of In N out burger. "I don't really want to get ambushed for some autographs right now. That okay?" I nod and sigh with relief because I knew that if we were to go inside that I'd be separated from him immediately. I let Justin order since he's a local and my first bite of the burger is good enough to be described as a big, juicy, piece of heaven. "It's fucking good right?" He asks as we chomp down on our burgers and fries in the restaurant parking lot checking our surroundings ever so often to make sure no ones snapping sneak pics. "It's good, but have you ever had some New York pizza?" He nods and pops a fry into his mouth. "Yeah I went to a place called Crust. They have one here too it-" I shake my head before sipping at my strawberry milkshake, "I'm not talking about a chain restaurant! You have to hit up the little whole in the wall ones where the grandma is in the back rolling out the pizza dough" Justin nods and slurps on his milkshake before offering me the straw so I can taste. It's a thick creamy chocolate that my stomach appreciates immensely. "Take me next weekend then" huh? "Huh?" I say, but this time it's out loud and I've stopped eating for a moment to analyze his implication. "Next weekend. When I come to visit you in New York, you've got to take me to a hole in the wall pizza parlor." I try to see if he's kidding but his face is completely serious as he takes a large and final bite of his burger. "Do you have business in New York next week?" "Only with you" he insists and my cheeks start to warm and I hope that my ball cap will shade me from his wandering brown eyes. "So this is going to be a thing huh?" "Seven. I'm going to hang around until you tell me your real name" I raise an eyebrow and suck my harder at my draw that's blocked by a strawberry. "And after that?" He leans close to me and for a moment I wonder if he's going to kiss me, but instead he wipes some excess ketchup from the side of my lips. "And I'll be a pest for as long as you'll have me" it's my turn to reach out and swipe away some ketchup and a stray piece of lettuce that's stuck to his face. "You're a messy eater" I admonish and he gives a wicked smirk, "you've got no idea Sev" he whispers and the car temperature rises a few degrees. We sit in silence save for our chewing and the light noise of the beach that sits below In N Out. "I've never been to the beach" I say wistfully as a mom loads her sand riddled kids into a mini van, wrapping each one up in a fluffy beach towel. "Never?" "Never." I confirm and Justin presses a button on his steering wheel. "What was that?" He points to the back of his car, "All your clothes are in the trunk and I got you a bikini remember?" I remember because I had specifically protested it and it's crazy stupid price. "Go change inside, everyone does it and when you get back we'll go down to the beach. "Are you serious?" He nods and adjusts his shades as I climb out of the car and run to the back. I take out the bag that holds my swimsuit arm then race to his side of the car and tap his window. Justin rolls it down and before he can get a word out I've placed my lips on his for a millisecond. "Thank you" I whisper and he doesn't reply with anything but a goofy smile and a roll up of his window.