It's so hard to avoid relapse daily. I can not eat anymore for fear of calories. It hur. And society still judges who have the disorder. It's hard waking up each day without thinking about all the calories you want to lose. I suffer, I cry, I despair, I feel the urge to scream as loud as I can to see if someone hears me.ts me put all the food out, but I can not fail to eliminate the all the food i eat. I know maybe I'm really skinny, but then why can not see it with my own eyes?









