68. "If I wanted you, you'd know." For Khari please? 💕
68. “If I wanted you, you’d know.”
There was something between you and Khari, you were sure of it. Others started to notice, too. Hayes gave you a shovel talk about affairs between colleagues, and how it can ruin your partnership at work. Quinn on the other hand looked absolutely melted every time they spotted you and Khari together.
You knew what you felt. Despite the abrasive front, Lortnoc was a good person. They were fiercely protective, and ready to stand up for others, especially if someone was being taken advantage of, or if they were weaker. Behind every rude remark, there was honest concern for you, and a very subtle plea for help.
Because Khari wanted to let you in, subconsciously. You were safety, you were an anchor, you were home. But, they were not ready to bring down the walls that shielded them for so many years. You understood, but at the same time, you just wished that the two of you knew what you were. Were you friends? Partners? Something more?
Was there something more behind every soft touch when they allowed you to fix their hair? Was there something more when their eyes lingered on your form just a bit longer? Did it mean anything, when their first instinct in face of danger was to make sure you are alright? Or when they moved their body forward, shielding you without even thinking about it?
You knew better than to ask outright, yet you did it anyway. It was late, the end of a graveyard shift, and you had barely any sleep the night before. Frustration and sleep deprivation did the work, and you ended up yelling in Khari’s face, asking them.
“I’m not a goddamn magnet toy, stop with that ‘pull and push’ crap! Do you want me or not?!”
You regretted it as soon as you saw their face. The faint shock, slowly melting into a cold, emotionless expression, remind you of a perfectly carved, stone mask. A shield from you. Another wall that would keep you two apart.
It was too soon. You asked too soon, at the wrong moment, and now you may have ruined it all.
“If I wanted you, you’d know, [Last Name].” They gritted out, physically moving away from you. Their green eyes were nothing but cold.
The distance between you suddenly felt all too real, keeping you away like a wall of fire. You did not dare reach out. Not when hearing a possible ‘don’t touch me ever again’ could break you completely, because that meant all the trust you’ve built was gone.
Khari left and you didn’t even realise, too caught up in your racing thoughts.
How did it end up going so wrong, when you were just about to have it all?