Discover Top Posts Tagged with #bixch

i'm a scum fuck needle dicked loser and my life is BETTER THAN YOURS

i think the jury is still deciding on whether the treats I ordered will or won't trigger every food allergy you have.

unfortunately, I think there's reasonable doubt.

my dating app just gave me preferential whiplash.

i went from someone who was way to gloomy to someone way too happy

coming out of retirement to tell you it sucks that your sandwich fell condiment side down on the pavement

sometimes you have to channel all your internal anger into replying to a random transphobe on twitter.

telling my doctor to prescribe a hearing aid because the silence has been deafening

one of these days I'll take a cartoonish chomp out of a tumeric root and no one will stop me.

I've decided I'm drinking all my oxygen from now on.

Breathing is for chumps

#bixch