i don’t view gender as a spectrum nor a binary. it’s all a bunch of categories filled with subgroups upon subgroups with differin’ qualities and modes. specifically like a gradient color palette, where all the genders (colors) sit next to each other in proximity.
gender is an internal experience located, to me at least, in the soul; and it has a color(s) certain hue, tone, and shade that tint the rest of your identity. two colors rarely ever be alike. like, we have the basic colors of the rainbow: red, orange, yellow, green, blue, purple. is you gon’ look in my face and say that a red that’s darker than the usual bright ass, ultra vibrant red ain’t red cause it ain’t exactly that red? or tell me that a purple that was the result of mixin’ to get its color ain’t real purple cause it ain’t look that way from the beginnin’? of course not. they still they colors, and should be treated as such.
non-binary is both a gender and a category. and in that respect, so is woman and man. and in that respect as well, so is hetero, lesbian, gay, bi, etc. this don’t mean just anything goes, purple is not red, but a purplish red can definitely be still red. even reds that act as a purple in conjuction with other colors on an art piece cause Color Theory are still reds.
i think with such an analogy, we can balance the need for differentiation and the need for diversity at the same time instead of conjoinin’ the gender binary together and relegatin’ anything abinary out the window from the conversation entirely. because at the end of the day, we don’t need to be the exact same hue, tone. dark red, light red, dull red and bright red all still red, anyway. this is an imperfect theory, so feel free to challenge or add to it.