Holy heck, as a Enby person who does use They/Them primarily I appreciate you taking up this fight, Its a stupid one full of stupid people, but watching you stay devoted to it really gives me hope for the future.
I don’t dig my heels in about much in public but by god, if I am going to insist on one thing specifically it is going to be this.
I used to be in the same boat with conflating ‘doesn’t have specifically stereotypical feminine traits on an otherwise traditionally androgynous form’ with ‘oh so he/him then’! I still struggle with it! Hell, sometimes I accidentally think of some of my own characters as ‘he/him’ before I go ‘whoops’ and correct myself!
But it’s not that hard to use they/them, like come the fuck on. It’s a four letter word people use all the damn time. Shape up.