Bones, Body, Soul.
A Jeff Hardy Story. (Ch. 5)
A pounding knock on the hollow, rickety door of the Hilton hotel room, number 103, is heard loud and clear on the muggy Thursday morning.
“Guys! C’mon, I forgot my room key!” The knocking continued, and a desperate Matt wailed on the other side while Jeff and Lemmy shuffled around in bed, Lemmy groaning from the rattling of the door. It felt like the whole damn room was shaking and they could already feel the headache growing. They stuffed themselves further into the crease of Jeff’s arm, gripping at the band of his basketball shorts, but their cuddles weren't convincing enough and Jeff clumsily slumped out of bed to throw the door open before jumping back in bed- coincidentally on Lemm.
“I’d really appreciate it if you guys didn't just sleep all morning. I want to introduce you to the new girl we're working with, Amy.” Matt looked down at the other two still rolling around in bed, Lemmy still halfway under Jeff and gripping onto him for dear life again. The room was actually freezing this time and they’d forgotten a sweatshirt.
Eventually, Matt forced them out of bed and down to breakfast with the rest of the superstars and a couple of families who looked very out of place. One of these superstars was Amy, who was super sweet and Lemmy’s new favorite person ever. Still half asleep, they ate fresh waffles with possibly stale syrup and many of those tiny paper cups full of orange juice. The Hardy’s and Amy were quick to get caught up in a conversation but Lemmy seemed out of it, too busy staring at someone behind Amy, who sat across from them.
“So, Lemmy, I’ve heard that you have a pretty similar wrestling style to Jeff and Matt, how come they didn’t pair you up with them instead?” Amy asked from across Lemmy, catching their attention.
“Oh! Uh, actually,” Their eyes lit up, replacing the glimmer of sleep that lay over top of them. “These guys started a wrestling company when we were younger, in high school, and someone in school told me about it when I moved to North Carolina. I tried out n’ got in, so I have the same upbringing as ‘em, which is why we wrestle so alike. We all loved creating characters and fighting against each other, but at one point me and Jeff had these two characters- Willow and Karma. They were pretty similar and were kind of a tag team, a lot of people really liked them and I really love being Karma, so I thought, might as well give a shot in the big leagues.” Lemmy’s passion for the subject was clear, the others at the small table smiling over at them at the memories it brought up.
“That’s so awesome! So how long have guys known each other?” Amy responded, curious about her new partners. The three went quiet, each searching for an answer in their minds, Matt eventually piping up.
“I think…uh, I had just graduated, so you guys were, what, 14 and 15?” Jeff nodded in Matt’s direction, but Lemmy was once again distracted and quickly excused themselves and jogged after someone making their way towards the elevator, too far into the hallway for the new, and very confused, teammates to see. Lemmy stumbled around the corner, calling out.
“‘Scuse me! Hey, um, excuse me, could I talk to you?” The two men turned around to find Lemmy running after them, a hopeful look and glimmering smile covering their face.
“Well, hello there Dallas! Wow, it’s been quite a while, hasn’t it?” One of them grinned as he spoke, black holes where teeth used to be.
“Yeah. Yeah, it has been, hasn’t it Mick? I really missed you guys, I wish we could’ve kept in contact.” Lemmy smiled back, revealing their own missing canine to two of the men they looked up to as mentors- Mick Foley and Al Snow. As weird as they are, Lemm found a huge sense of belonging and comfort in their company.
“Hey, speaking of that, do they…does anyone...” Al trailed off, his point was made obvious and Lemmy was shaking their head no before he could finish what he had started.
“Uh...no.” Lemmy looked down at their hands, guilt obvious in their slumped shoulders. The three went quiet for a while, Mick placing a comforting hand on Lemm’s shoulder and they looked up with a quick breath as if they hadn’t been breathing at all, as if there was too much on their mind that their body had stopped working.
“No one knows. I don’t know how long I’ll keep it that way, but I don’t know how to tell them. I’ve just…kept it a secret for so long, y’know?” The conversation paused for a section before Lemmy waved it away. “Um, anyways, I wanted to ask you something.”
“Ask away, kid!” Mick shot at them with a heartfelt grin, Al doing the same from next to him.
“Well...I just, I know that I was only a jobber and I wasn’t there for very long, at all, but it felt more like a home there than it does here. I felt more…appreciated. Even with my boys here. I’m just- I’m not being pushed, they only really put me on the card when someone else gets injured or something and I’m fed up with it! And I know it's because I’m on the women's roster, we maybe get a match every week if we beg them enough!” Lemmy’s voice rose with desperation and anger, Mick and Al trying to offer them consolidating smiles.
“I just...I just wanted to ask if you guys think that ECW would push me more than WWF does. Or maybe they would let me wrestle everyone, I've been trying to do that for a while. I think that…I think Karma and I would fit in a lot better over there.”
The arena was as crowded and compact as it always was. The card was packed full of superstars- still no one from the women’s roster with an actual match, but Amy was going out with Essa Rios for his match against the Hardyz, which would be the start of their way to working together. That was probably all the action their roster would get all week that was actually about wrestling- something Amy would get to interfere in a match.
Lemmy sat in catering with the Hardyz and Amy, who went by Lita in the ring, the group claiming one of the many bumpy, foldable tables as their own. Though all four of them were present and excited to finally be working together, Lemmy was back to staring into space. A bump to their shoulder brought them out of their confusion, finding Jeff sitting a little closer to them than he had been before with a concerned look on his face, eyebrows creased in the way they always seemed to be lately.
“You okay, Lemm? Been thinkin’ up there all day long.” A soft smile graced Lemm’s face at his concern, warmth creeping up their neck along with it. Their eyes glanced down at the table as Jeff softly brought his arm around them and pushed them into him, the concern never leaving his face but a smile adorning it as well.
“I’m all good, Jeffro. Just thinkin’ about a lot today, I guess.” Jeff hummed in response, clearly not believing them, but Lemm was quick to take the topic off his mind and moved away from his side to jokingly point a finger in his face. “Hey, don’t get all worried about me, you've gotta match! And an important one too. Speaking of which, I think you guys are on after this next one, so you should probably go get dressed and all that stuff.” Lemmy directed the last few sentences at the other two as well and watched them all get up from the table.
With a quick goodbye, Matt and Amy left to go get ready, but Jeff still stood in front of Lemmy.
“Whatever’s bothering you, you know that I’ll help you with it if you let me, right? And we’re talking about this after I get back, man.” Though Jeff towered above them from their steel, cold chair to have him there was still comforting, and so was the hand he laid on the back of their upper arm. Lemmy closed their eyes from both the comfort and how much they hated lying to him.
“I promise, I really am fine. Now go get ready, would you? I wanna watch your guys’ match.” Lemmy sent him a soft shove and a teasing grin, sending the boy on his way.
The match was amazing, as theirs always were. Amy delivered a great hurricanrana to Matt behind the ref's back and the crowd was always interactive with things like that. Lemmy loved to watch them perform, they had since their first audition into OMEGA when they watched Matt and Jeff jump around on that dumb, half-busted trampoline. But something about today- with everything that had been going on and the way the crowd cheered for Amy as they had done for their debut, Lemmy felt more anger than they had in a long time.
With watering eyes and taping feet, the feeling of deep-rooted, unwelcomed hatred sent them far back to memories of Texas. Where they had no one but grandparents with no understanding, a dad halfway across the world, and a mother who left a long, long, time ago. They weren’t good enough then, and now, after the years of work they’d put into their dreams, all of the life accomplishments, and school dances, and parties, and having an actual goddamned life, they’d skipped to be put right here in this damn company, they still weren’t good enough.
They jumped from their chair, sending it tumbling to the ground with a few clanks, and shoved their way through the cramped hallway, earning many confused stares. Billy Gunn called out for them, confused, from one of the other tables.
“Oh hey, Lemmy! How’ve you been…“ Adam, with a grinning Christian at his side, each in their silly pair of sunglasses, spoke with excitement at the sight of the duo’s very well-known friend, but his sentiments trailed off at Lemmy’s burning scowl. Lemmy continued down the hallway with no signs of stopping until they reached the end, where they grabbed ahold of the farthest door and swung it open, the sound of the metal knob hitting the concreted wall ricocheting violently. E&C glanced at each other in worry when they caught a glimpse at the door's name plate- Mr. McMahon.
Suddenly, the anger is gone and Lemmy stands in front of the desk, Mr.McMahon slowly looking up with the expression of disgust he always seems to have, and regrets their impulsive actions.
“May I help you?” The older man rasps out slowly, hand still holding a metal ballpoint pen waving out.
“I have- I need to talk to you.” They blurt out, arms crossing and posture straightening. “I don’t understand why I’m not getting on the card. The Hardys, they’re,” A scoffed laugh comes from them. “they’re out there every Smackdown and I’ve got the same skillset- we all know it. I deserve to be out there too.” It’s Vince’s turn to scoff. He leans back in the big, leather office chair.
“There are plenty of other people experiencing this, and they, Dallas, are grateful for what I give them. What makes you any better than them?”
“I may have signed a contract for you, but in case you can’t remember, I forced it down to a year. That year is comin’ around pretty damn quick, and I will happily take my unused talents somewhere I’ll be appreciated the second it's done.” They scowled, the feeling of Texas and its anger returning. Vince looks on at them silently, before placing his pen down and placing his elbows on the wooden desk, fingers locking together.
“Well, it seems nobody here is happy with this… arrangement. I see no reason why we shouldn’t just cut our business together now.” He shrugs with a smug look.
“I,” Lemmy takes a breath, tongue running over their teeth before clenching their jaw. “I think I’d have to agree with you. Why don’t you let me know when you have that paperwork done?” They send him a lasting, bitter smile, before turning around. Hand reaching for the door, they pause and turn their head. “Vince?”
He doesn’t respond.
“The next time you hear my name you're going to regret every decision you’ve ever made.”
With nowhere to go, Lemmy spends the rest of the night pacing between catering and the men’s locker room, waiting for the Hardys to show up. Matt liked to wander around the arena and socialize a bit, and Lemmy guessed Jeff had gone with him when they weren’t found in catering. Sometime in their nervous waiting, Billy Gunn had come up to them and asked, while very concerned, what was going on and if they were okay. Grateful for his attempt, Lemmy gave him the best smile they could conjure (which only made him more concerned, they looked on the verge of sobbing) and melted into his sweet hug.
As the night came to a close, Lemm watched everyone start to drag their belongings out of the arena, anxiety growing. Just as they are about to head to the locker room and grab their bags, Matt, Amy, and Jeff round the corner with matching smiles. Wasting no time, Lemmy starts walking towards them. Noticing them quickly, Jeff starts to reach out to put an arm around their shoulder to have them join the group, but his grin, along with the other two’s, quickly turns into a frown.
“Lemm, what's wrong?” Matt asks from the other side of Lita, Jeff grabbing them gently by the elbow.
“What’s goin’ on, man?” Their mouth gapes open as they look at Jeff, but they can't find the words and turn their head away. He pulls them in closer, his other hand meeting their upper arm. “Dal, sweetheart, tell me whats the matter,” He practically whispers, voice soft. “All I wanna do is help, yeah? Just let me help.”
Lemm fell against him instead of answering, eyes closing against his shoulder. His arms quickly surround them as he looks over at Matt and Amy in concern. The brothers weren’t sure if they’d even seen Lemmy like this.
“I gotta talk to you guys.” They finally mutter, barely audible. “Just…not here.”
Jeff nodded quickly, rubbing up and down their back, still looking over at Matt while he gestured towards the locker room.
“That's fine, we can go back to the hotel,” Matt assured, thankful they had decided to stay in the city for one more day. “You guys just head to the car, me and Lita will grab our stuff.” He hands the keys off to Jeff, and they’re quick to part ways. Separating from their long hug, Jeff and Lemm make their way to the car (Jeff still has a hand on their back, trying to offer some comfort.), where they sit in the backseat with Lemm's head lying on his shoulder, waiting for Matt and Amy to hop in the front seats. The drive to the hotel was quiet, the same with the walk to their room.
Amy decided to give the three some space and went to visit Trish a couple of floors down. Lemm sat on one of the beds, with Jeff beside them and Matt across from them in the one corner chair that's always in hotels, he’d pulled over.
“I got fired.”
Matt looked at them with wide, unexpected eyes and they looked down to avoid it. They refused to look at Jeff at all.
“I’m sorry?” The older brother asked.
“I, um,” A watery laugh broke from their throat as they rubbed at their forehead. “I got fired.”
“Wh-“ Jeff started. “H-Wh-I…What the hell happened, Dal?” Lemmy's shoulder shook with unwanted laughter. They looked (really) kinda fucking crazy. They managed to stop themselves after noticing the awkward silence that lingered outside of them.
“I was mad, at everything. Like I first was when I met y’all,” They shrugged. “Went into Vince’s office to have a word, and then it was all…everything was done. That's it.” Their hands motioned in front of them. “It’s done.”
“No, no, we just need to- to talk with him again, I’m sure it was just a misunderstanding-“ Matt tries, but Lemm only shakes their head.
“Nah. It’s gone. Here? M’ done. They don’t want nothin’ to do with me, nothin’ at all. Alls they wanna do is let me sit and waste, like the rest of the roster that gets nothing. Alls they ever do is pick and choose who's got it and let everyone else out to waste. Waste! This damn company didn’t want me in the first place, and I’m fuckin’ done with ‘em.” Neither of the brothers knows how to respond to their anger. Minutes pass in silence.
“Lemm, what the hell are you gonna do? What are we gonna do?” Jeff finally speaks up. Lemmy shakes their head, finally looking over to him. The look in his eyes was heartbreaking.
“You’re-you’re not gonna do nothing. Those people love you, and in a couple of weeks, you two’ve got the match of a damn lifetime. I could not be more proud of you, and I won’t let you pull yourself down for me. Neither of you.” A sense of grief rose in the room. Not once in their careers, or really, for the past half-decade, had they spent much more than a day apart. Alliances were hard to keep in this industry, let alone friendships, and now it felt a little bit like everything was washing down the drain.
“…What’re you gonna do, though?” Jeff repeated. A minute of silence washed back over.
“I…” They hesitated, wiping their hands back over their face. “When my dad left ECW, and WWF called him up, I…I, um,” They paused again, voice growing heavy and wet. “…You can’t be mad at me when I tell you this.” Lemm’s voice is muffled behind their hands as they look up to the sky. Jeff grabs their wrists, gently, and pulls them down.
“Dal, c’mon,” He rubs the soft underside of their arms. “You don’t have to carry this by yourself anymore. Whatever it is, I’ve got you. Just tell me. We won’t be mad.” Matt backs him up with his own assurance.
“…You know how much I loved ECW,” They started. “I mean- it was, it was so much more…brutal than when dad was in WCW before that. And I just…God, I wanted to be there so bad, and, y’know,” Another laugh escaped them, unable to stop the nervous habit before they let everything rush out. “He’d-he had just left n’ come here n’ you guys had summer jobs, there was…I heard they were looking for a couple people so I called the number in the Yellowbook- n’ it was stupid, but I just- everything was so- it was, it was everything I wanted from wrestling-“
“I’m kinda a little lost here, what?” Matt interrupted, shaking his head softly.
“…when I was 16 I told Paul Heyman, ECW’s creative director, that I was 19 so that I could job for a couple weekends. When I told y’all I was babysitting for Uncle Scott’s friend.” The room went silent, and Matt put his head in his hands.
“Oh, my, God, Lemmy.”
“Yeah, I know, it's bad.” They nodded franticly with closed eyes and another panicked laugh.
“I don’t… what's that gotta do with everything now?” Jeff asked, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
“ECW…Paul liked me. I think he knew I was lying, half the damn roster was lying about something. I still have his number, I’m gonna call him. This sounds crazy, but everything- all of this, is happening for a reason. ECW is my destiny.”
AHHHHHHH
somebody yell at me. SOMEBODY YELL AT ME. i make u wait A YEAR AND TWO MONTHS for this pile of garbage im so sorry
anyways happy new year, figured id actually write in this one but i have no clue where to go after this so…if you have to wait another year i give my condolences. I did go back n make the rest of the series actually okay-ish before this which is half of what took me this long lol
i bought myself a 370 dollar lego set for christmas so ive def been keeping myself busy, and im never buying anything ever again!