based on this post about (hypothetical?) book!Daniel Molloy haters bc hating on a character for his puppy dog qualities is insanely funny to me
“This is outrageous!”
“Yes, beloved.”
“Absolutely uncalled for.”
“I know, beloved.”
“I mean, people hate on Lestat and Marius and you for legitimate reasons – even though I, of course, think that’s bullshit when it comes to you, because you’re sexy when you do morally questionable things–”
“Thank you, beloved.”
“But this?” Daniel threw his hands up. “Why am I the one with the biggest hater base when they’re literally hating on me for no reason? 'Daniel the Spaniel' they call me!"
Armand did not giggle at that. Daniel knew because he saw him raise a hand to hide his face behind his palm.
"Please!" Daniel scoffed. "I do not ‘trail after Armand like a lost puppy’!”
Gaze glued to his phone with the bird app opened, Daniel almost bumped into Armand when his maker stopped in his tracks. Armand turned around slowly, shooting a pointed look at Daniel, who had been, notably, trailing after Armand.
“Well, I’m not lost for one thing!” Daniel spluttered. “I’m exactly where I want to be!”
That conjured a smile on his maker’s face, which was a win in itself. Almost shy, Armand ducked his head and if he’d fed a little more recently, Daniel was sure he would’ve blushed. Fuck these twitterers! (Tweeters?) They didn’t get to see Armand like this, so how could they possibly understand?
“‘It’s annoying’, they say! ‘He has no personality other than simping for Armand’, they say. Do you think I’m annoying?”
“No, beloved.” He titled his head to the side, considering. “Well, only sometimes.”
“Only sometimes! Take that twitter user lestatstitty.” Daniel started typing furiously on his phone. “Also, I literally have other hobbies! Simping for Armand is a fulltime job, but I do have other things I like doing!”
“Yes?” Armand asked sweetly. “What is that, lover?”
“Well– journalism, for one thing!”
Because he loved him, Armand did not point out that Daniel had not written let alone investigated anything in decades. Because he still felt guilty about whisking him away from his mortal passions, Armand would never dare to mention such a thing to him at all. God, Daniel ached for him.
It didn’t matter anyway. Journalism was still as much part of him as his maker's blood in his veins had become over the years. And he had an eternity yet to go back to it after all. Maybe win a Pulitzer or two, even.
“Plus,” Daniel said haughtily. “I have my trains.”
“Oh, your trains are lovely!” Armand said immediately and Daniel preened.
“They are, aren’t they?” He said with no small amount of pride. “And we used to go to all kinds of events, back in the day, what’s boring about that?”
“I don’t think you’re boring,” said Armand helpfully.
“Thanks babe.” Daniel smiled. “And anyway, what’s so bad about simping for The Vampire Armand, hm? More people should do it.” In imitation of Armand's earlier gesture, he tilted his head to one side in consideration. “On second thought, no! No need to outsource what I’ve already mastered, right?”
“Yes, beloved.”
“I've just decided to lean into it, actually," Daniel announced, tucking his phone back into his pocket. "So you better get your leash out for this spaniel.”
Who needed Pulitzers? Armand’s laughter ringing out through the entire hall was, arguably, the best reward of all.
"Daniel stared hard at the creature before him, this thing that looked human and sounded human but was not. There was a horrid shift in his consciousness; he saw this being like a great insect, a monstrous evil predator who had devoured a million human lives. And yet he loved this thing. [...] He loved it not because it looked like a gentle, thoughtful young man, but because it was ghastly and awful and loathsome, and beautiful all at the same time. He loved it the way people love evil, because it thrills them to the core of their souls."
"I am lord and master of my own island, I am the Devil's minion and he grants my every wish."
