#boysucks

[professionaloverthinkerr2-blog]

sad but true

stop checking your phone, he´s not going to text you

[am-i-awake]

since Allan hadn't been responding to my texts, I went by the liquor store before he got off. he asked if we could go talk in the back, and I knew right away it wasn't gonna be good... he told me how he can't do this anymore, because he realized his breakup has left him emotionally torn up, and it isn't fair to me. he also thinks this will make it easier on me when he leaves,and he doesn't want to get too emotionally attached, but right now I just feel rejected and sad because now I'm cut off cold & he's still around. I also managed to notice he deleted all my texts without even bothering to respond, which leaves me to wonder whether he would have told me anytime soon, since we were supposed to hang out this weekend... it's gonna suck seeing him at work, getting no hugs or kisses. he doesn't think it wil be awkward, but I feel awkward because I feel like I've made a fool of myself in a way... I started liking him too much, and now it's done. we're going to keep being friends, but I feel like it won't be the same at all. we have breached the wall of friendship by being intimate, and now that's cut off.  I'm also very disappointed that the one time we had sex wasn't very good, and that's all I'm gonna get. just FUCK. why couldn't he have just lasted until he had to move... I'm so hurt, and I feel like I have so much to say to him but I don't think I'll really get the chance seeing as I'll only see him at work from now on, and we barely work together as is. this sucks :(