My apologies for the late letter, I came down with a fever and haven’t had the energy to write. I’m feeling better now, I was given a dose of medicine that made me sleep. I feel better now.
I hope the flower crown I sent came in one piece, Eva “mouse” said that flowers don’t always ship well. Sometimes they get crushed in the mail or arrive dead.
I heard you like music too, I am a member of the Sodor choir. We mostly sing hymns and gospel songs, I like hymns, they’re so beautiful and easy to sing. Duncan also introduced me to rock music but I don’t know if I am a fan.
I envy you, you’re so young and innocent, how are you always so optimistic and kind? This world doesn’t appreciate kindness. If you show an ounce of kindness you die. Kind people always die in the end. The best way of survival is every man for himself, if the private next to you is wounded, don’t go back for him, get yourself out of there before the sniper reloads and shoots you.
How are you able to help people without putting a target on your back? Nobody ever appreciates kindness or even thanks people for it, how are you even able to stay so kind and positive in this hell that we call life?
I’m at croven’s gate if you ever want to visit.
I am glad that you are feeling better, and the flowers are beautiful. Thank you so much for the gift. They remind me of my first concert, where I was decorated with white poinsettias.
It's wonderful that you are a member of the choir. I do like hymns as they are very common at Christmas, however my horns don't play well to the hymn melody. I do hope at some point it can be arranged so I can hear your choir perform.
I don't really know how I stay so kind, considering what I survived, although I can't imagine what I suffered even beginns to compare to war combat.
The Controllers have always described me as shy and naïve; possibly on the spectrum (whatever that means). Or my kindness is from the support from my 'family'.
Dad said I was ill-received when I came into this world, unwanted and easily bullied by men and engine alike. North Star: Mum, they wouldn't stand others being mean to me. Dad said they were fascinated with human children and wanted a 'child' more than anything in the world.
Dad says North Star had a positive light of energy that burned so warm from within them. He said he would do anything for Mum, even becoming a parent. Dad at the time didn't have much good in his life, he had been downgraded from an express engine to a freight engine, and given some of the most horrid jobs, including taking engines to the scrap yard.
I remember Mum told me to always believe in the stars, that they would always be a guiding light. The night after Mum sacrificed themself so Dad could save me from the 'cutter's torch'... I should've felt angry or bitter or sadness... but I looked up at the stars and I just believed. Knowing Mum wouldn't want me to feel such pain and darkness.
Since I was rescued, I just have continued to be me, to keep that light within. No matter the pain and darkness of others I just feel the belief in the light, like a star in the darkness of the night sky.
I've never been in war and can't even begin to image the horrors of it. However, I will send my greatest gratitude to you and all that served to keep the countless lives safe. Sadly, there is not much I can do to heal the wounds of the spirit. I can offer you companionship and an ear to talk too.
I really do hope we get to meet sometime. I may or may not have been to Croven's Gate. Usually I'm very quiet, and shy around other engines. Also, sometimes other engines laugh at the sound of my engine, so I try not to draw too much attention to myself.
