#breakup form

[peaamlipoetrydoctor]

Another Breakup //// "Show more"

Received my poetic response from Alexandra Naughton - and delighted to see it's made use of the Breakup format as well (or, that can be taken from the context...). At the very least, it also uses erasure.

I'd have to say that reading between the gaps, the review for my original offering is - lukewarm? - but them's the breaks :)

perhaps a good opp / a good try wasn't / crafting a breakup / crafting a format / perhaps expected / crafting a following / perhaps show more!

Alexandra Naughton on X: "@paulettya @mag_gabbert perhaps a good opp a good try wasn’t crafting a breakup crafting a format perhaps expected crafting a following perhaps show more https://t.co/ogbwG0bbDw" / X

[peaamlipoetrydoctor]

"Poem/Poem Time"

Saw the following on X and thought it would be fun to YES this offer:

Alexandra Naughton on X: "if you write a poem for me, I’ll write a poem for you. you must post it to the timeline, however." / X

It also felt like a decent opportunity to try a response to Mag Gabbert's 'breakup' poetry form -

Sooooo -

As I had already discovered - this form is hard to do WELL. The starting point sentence is (ofc!) extremely important and there's a proper, subtle skill in mining out word/phrases that ADD anything to that start-point.

Not sure that any of these efforts really did the job - and again, unsurprisingly, I think the third attempt was the best. [I broke the format a bit by recapping what the poem supposedly said, below it.]

Poem 3:

If you write, I must / if I write, you must / if I must - you must / if you must - I must / poem line / poem time / poem poem time!

Poem 2:

A poem line / however you write a poem / how you write time / I'll time it / write to the line / how you poem, you must post me / write for me / write forever...

Poem 1:

If you must - post the time / you must however write it / as a poem / a poem / a poem for me / a poem for you.