#breenlala speaks

[breenlala]

Self affirmation log time again, feel free to scroll on

Today I:

- only ate twice but both meals were pretty healthy and varied

-made sure we didnt forget dinner again

- took my meds, and put the new bottle behind the old one so when I run out itll be there

- helped take my family on an elder friendly outing during these rona times (we went for a drive and looked at the yards of fancy houses)

-attended my DigitalDnD session and didnt cancel amd had fun even

-dressed up a little

-listened to music

Things are not always bad, they can be good too.

[breenlala]

I am have a sads

I was supposed to see Hozier at Hollywood Forever Cemetary this evening, but winds straight from hell forced the concert to get cancelled. We got there and got all seated on our picnic blankets, and saw the preshow (Jade Bird is awesome tho. Like real cool) but then when the gangle bog man himself was supposed to go on, we were told to calmly evacuate.

I mean, theyll refund my tickets or honor them at the reschedule. But that doesnt help the gas I spent to get here or the money we spent on food and hotel or the precious vacation days my party used to be here. So, that disappointing. Still a fun trip overall, but disappointing /:

But hey, I've now been to a cancelled concert. So that's a thing checked of the life experience list I guess

[breenlala]

So riot games made a kpop girl group out of some of their league o legends heroes, and made a pretty decent kpop music video with them by general standards. I dont even play league. I feel personally targeted.

[breenlala]

Epiphany

So, I think I figured out a connection between all the characters I've fixated on for long periods of time.

The List, as I can recall so far:

-Soul Eater Evans (Soul Eater)

-Kreig (borderlands 2)

-James Buchanan Bucky Barnes (mcu)

-Junkrat (Overwatch)(this addition is questionable, but still kinda fits)

-Alice (American Mcgee's Alice, and Madness Returns)

-Edward and Alphonse Elric (and much of the rest of the cast of FMA tbh)

And the most recent Entries

-Mollymauk Tealeaf (Critical Roll Campaign 2, another mildly questionable entry but and entry nonetheless)

-Caleb Widowghast (also critical role campaign 2)

Common thread?

Haunted by terrible horrors of their pasts

Dealing with, driven mad by, haunted by their pasts. Running from what they can't remember. Terrified and often broken by what they can. And, usually, making do anyway. Finding one thing to hold onto, and forging themselves with or for that thing, despite and in spite of, whatever happened before.

I have feelings. Hmmmm.

[breenlala]

AaaaaaaahI

I just officially signed up to run DnD for a party of 8. And I've never actually run dnd before.

I've played, sure, and I've been watching a shit ton of Critical Role recently, so I'm familiar enough.

I've just never run

And in about 3 weeks, I'm going to run a onneshot for 8 people.

I'm excited, and terrified

This'll be... interesting

[breenlala]

Working as a whole adult is so weird sometimes

Like I just have 3 blorbos rotating in the back of my mind that i wanna go full fan about, but I've gotta lock in and pay attention to Bingus from Engineering and Bongus from marketing and what meeting they're trying to move this time.

[breenlala]

I read a really good book this last weekend while I had a migraine. Devoured the whole thing in a day. I wish I could remember which of my important people bought it for me tho...

Ah well. Time to stew in wanting more book when it was just a single book.

[breenlala]

Pity party to follow, feel free to skip

Yesterday was my late grandfathers birthday. When I remembered I missed him so much. I’ve been in a bit of a funk ever since. /:

I still haven’t cried

*sigh*

Welp, time for bed