I babysit a 5yo girl who I think might be gifted. I don't know that she is/will be book-smart, which obviously isn't the only way to be gifted, but she has other behaviors and traits that make me suspicious. I'm not an educator or anything, but I'm wondering whether I should talk to the parents about her. Given the role of GT-ness in my community, I'm not sure if I should point it out or wait for a teacher to do so, if a teacher ever notices it. Any thoughts?
This is a challenging question, and I’m not sure. It can sometimes be hard to tell. What kinds of things have you noticed? I think part of this might depend upon how her parents and the school system view and work with giftedness, and also upon how much you think you personally or others you know can or want to help her with it, and what kind of help she might need. Telling people could be super great for her, but it also might not be, or it might put some unrealistic expectations on her.
I guess my one hesitation here is that if she is held to a standard of giftedness and doing-what-gifted-kids-do, but there is an unrealistic bar for those things... it could do a number on her self confidence and lead to imposter syndrome or gifted underachiever syndrome, which I hate to see anyone go through. (I say this from experience with my younger brother and our school system not understanding what giftedness even is.)
I would recommend that you:
- Look at what kinds of things are in place in your community and what requirements there are to get into those and see if they are reasonable and realistic standards.
- Consider what her parents know about giftedness.
- Try to provide resources, coping skills, someone to talk to, enrichment in whatever areas she holds interest, talent, skill, etc. where you are able to.
- Consider multiple explanations for what you’re noticing in her, because some gifted things overlap with some adhd or autism or other neurothings, and see how they compare, and it’s important for those things to not be overlooked because of giftedness.
And if you decide to talk to her parents about it, I would go prepared to explain to them what giftedness is, provide them some resources, and dispel any myths about it that they might have heard. That will probably help give her a lot better chance, if her parents know abut it already. I’d definitely go with a “this might be but it also might not be” approach. It’s hard to tell sometimes, and can definitely be hard to know what to do in these situations.
(Do any mods or followers have more thoughts? Please give thoughts and ideas and advice!)
