#brighteststar707

[marshmallowprotection]

Oooh Kait what are the phones in the Mint Eye box? Do we get an inside look at the RFA's phones?

Oh, you've never seen his page in the box before? I'll show you what it looks like, then! You get a glimpse into what everyone carries around in their personal bags! I apologize if these are a little bit blurry, I tried my best! It's revealed that Saeyoung has upwards of five cell phones that he keeps with him, and he's using a different name every time he gets a phone call on them.

[mandiemegatron]

The bingo game is so cute!! Can ask you for your takes on mysme Zen?

OOOOHHHHH WHY YES YOU CAN !!!!

Zen was my first mysme lover and he will forever hold a soft spot in my heart 😭😭😭

ZEN IS NOT A NARCISSIST, HE IS TRAUMATIZED FROM HIS PARENTS BEING CRUEL AS FUCK TO HIM (AND ALSO JUMIN BEING A BUTTHEAD) AND I WISH MORE PEOPLE IN THE FANDOM WOULD TAKE HIS TRAUMA SERIOUSLY 😤😤😤😤😤

Zen.... my love.... 😭😭😭😭 I miss you so 😭😭😭😭😭😭

[mystic-lodi]

Aah Lodi hi! I haven't seen you on the dash in a while, I hope you're doing well!

Ahhhhh faye hi!!! You're so sweet for checking in thank you so much! Law school + two part time jobs + finally taking care of my mental health has been absolutely insane so I haven't had a lot of time to draw lmaooo next semester should be a lot lighter school wise so I'm hoping to be able to post more in the spring!! I hope you're doing well too!!! 💚💚💚

[medu707]

Yay ask game time! I'd like to ask numbers 1, 8 and 23 please 👀

Thanks for the ask Faye!! 💛💛

how would you describe your style

It's a tough question, I've never tried to describe my own style before. 👀 Maybe emotional/intuitive for my more 'serious' drawings? I make great efforts to reflect the personalities of the characters I draw -and they usually have sad backgrounds-. Technically tho? I think my style is a little stiff. This is something I want to improve in the future. 🤔

8. what’s the most fun and the least fun parts about your process

The most fun would be sketching process I guess but lately I find coloring also super fun! Even though I don't know about color theory much. Well the least fun.. It's really sad to say that my line-art process is becoming a bit bothersome nowadays. 😞

23. what’s something you hope people notice when looking at your art

Like I said, if I'm drawing a serious or sad art piece, I like to add some symbolic and metaphorical details, although it's not that obvious in my MM drawings. I feel so happy when people see these details and comment about it! (Though do I have some unfinished pieces somewhere?? Well.. A lot.) 😌

[space-wedding]

Aaaa those prompts are adorable! It was hard to pick one, but as someone who cooks a lot, I had to go with  giving the other a spoonful of the meal they’re cooking to test it out, holding their hand under their chin so nothing falls for Saeyoung!

I'm excited to see what you come up with <33

omg yeeeeessssss!!! this is such a cute prompt!!! thank you for this, I had a lot of fun writing this cute drabble! I love domestic Saeyoung! - Prompt list

You've been living with Saeyoung for a while now. Both of you working from home as to spend as much time together as possible. Housework fairly divided between the two of you. You cook (mostly), in turn he washes the dishes. You look after the plants, he looks after all the tech stuff. And so on.

You love trying out new recipes and experimenting with food. Despite the test cooking not always ending in the best possible result, Saeyoung will always say he loves it, because you took the time and effort to prepare it for him.

Dinner time is rapidly approaching as you make your way to the kitchen. Honey glazed chicken with veggies and rice was on the plan for today. You put on your apron, starting with the mise en place, dicing up the chicken, putting on the rice.

The sweet smell of butter and honey draws a certain someone out of the quarters of his computer room, where he was working on new gadgets and toys. He enters the kitchen with footsteps, light as a feather, but you feel his presence. Saeyoung puts his hands on your hips from behind you and whispers in your ear: "What're you cookin' good lookin'?"

You don't want to give him the satisfaction, but you also cant't help but laugh at his absolutely awful joke(?) pick-up-line(?).

Turning around to face him, you hold out a spoon, the same you use for cooking, with a bite sized piece of chicken on it. "Careful it's hot!" Of course he doesn’t listen. Almost anticipating of what's gonna happen, you put your other hand under his chin, so nothing will fall on the ground.

"Hot hot hot hot!!! ith tho hot!" He utters, while breathing in air with a half open mouth, hoping to cool it down. Some of the sauce is dripping down his chin in the process, lucky you catch it. Finally he is able to swallow. You grab a piece of paper towel to wipe your boyfriends chin. "Awww! poor Saeyoung burned his mouth?" You joke. He answers by pouting his lips. "Yes, poor me did burn my mouth, but I think a kiss from my beloved would make it all better!" Of course, you compromise, healing this poor mans burn.

[currentlyprocrastinating]

The hot chocolate piece you wrote for Pilot/Saeran made me curious about their dynamic, so I'd like to ask 4, 5 and 7 for them!

(also the donuts omg 😭 where I live they're not very popular but I see them online all the time and they look so good!!!)

jakvdjsha that is WILD to imagine ;0; hopefully u get to try those donuts one day!! just. dont get them from Krispy Kreme 💀 everyone says im crazy for not liking them but they are literally so overrated LOL

Pre-relationship 4 — Who felt romantic feelings first?

Pre-relationship 5 — Did either of them try to resist their feelings?

Pre-relationship 7 — What would their lives be like if they had never met?

Pre-relationship 4:

Saeran. Without a doubt. Even when he thought Pilot and Squirrel were like Ray and Saeran, he still considered that, in a way, an "extension" of the girl he loves. And that didn't change when the nature of Pilot's relation to Squirrel was finally explained in a way that he could comprehend. (The concept is a bit abstract.)

I'll explain a bit about Pilot here. There's different versions of her for different scenarios. Pilot is Squirrel's agent name, and as it became more and more clear that Pilot had a large presence during Squirrel's agent work, Pilot adopted the name, thus giving her something of an identity. This was only to benefit Squirrel. Pilot is quite literally an advanced form of compartmentalization, brought about as "side-effect" of the nature of their powers. And now that Squirrel was taking on regular, mind-bending tasks, that more distinct separation became necessary.

All that to say that both Squirrel and Pilot are sort of "in the driver's seat" during her work. It's usually Squirrel just letting a different, more eccentric and carefree side of hers show, and Pilot hovering over her shoulder as back-up to absorb mental blows and establish a presence — so that Squirrel can call this different in what she presents "Pilot."

There's also the Pilot that emerges when Squirrel needs to "recalibrate." She usually lays on the floor, on her back, and just lets herself drift away a bit. Squirrel can still see and hear everything that happens, but Pilot is the one now sorting through their thoughts — letting Squirrel let go for a bit to, well, "reset" herself and feel better/reenergize/regain confidence/etc. That Pilot usually pulls out that "eccentric" persona, heard since she talks out loud to sort things out. She's interacted with Saeran that way at least once. (In fact, as of right now, I have that scene written and it's his first introduction to Pilot; something that Squirrel wasn't thrilled about but had no control over. This might change in the future, though.)

And finally, there's the true Pilot. The Pilot that comes out in those rare times that Squirrel gets triggered so badly she just shuts down. Or when she's so stressed, or panicked, or in any sort of extreme or overwhelming emotional distress, and she can't deal with it — so she pushes Pilot to the front, because Pilot can deal with these thoughts, and Pilot will protect her, and Pilot is... is a stone wall. In more ways than just a tough shield lmao.

Pilot carries some aspects of Squirrel; Squirrel carries all aspects of Pilot. Pilot is so different, though, because of what she lacks and because of her role. She didn't, at first, truly share Squirrel's love for Saeran — because that wasn't exactly an emotion that caused legitimate problems for Squirrel's health, nor was it an emotion that she required to complete her role.

She did, however, have a sliver of Squirrel's visual/aesthetic attraction towards Saeran. Because, all wrapped up together, every single category of Squirrel's feelings towards him that ultimately turned into this full, whole-hearted, complex idea called love — it did get overwhelming for her at times. A good sort of overwhelming, but nevertheless.

So, Pilot could recognize the aesthetic appeal of Saeran to their mind, but she ignored it once she could see it wasn't a problem. Pilot is... sort of... robotic? In the way her part of the mind functions and the way she makes decisions and such. I mean, she's quite literally, too, the only part of Squirrel that can be called "fully alien."

Over time, more and more of Squirrel's feelings for Saeran began to seep into Pilot (Squirrel likes to think, although it's "grossly cheesy," that it's because she wants all of her to love him. She's probably right). Which eventually results in Pilot having this very obvious "crush" on Saeran — one she tries to ignore. (Once, she even scolded Squirrel for "contaminating her with an emotion she's not responsible for." Squirrel cheekily responded that love can turn people dangerous — wouldn't it be best if Pilot knew how to protect both it and Squirrel in such context? Not that Squirrel truly has any control over this happening.)

Sidebar: As mentioned in Hot Chocolate, Pilot doesn't mind "doing the things Saeran and Squirrel do" (i.e. kissing) but there's really no point to it since there's no real emotion behind it on Pilot's end; she's just mimicking behavior. This gradually changes as more of Squirrel's emotion slowly infiltrates her.

Pre-relationship 5:

I kind of touched on this in the prior ramble (lmao, sorry), but yes! Pilot ignores it as much as she can. Saeran is very respectful (if not also cautious) with her. She's a little unpredictable and doesn't always respond in ways that could be deemed "normal."

To a degree, Saeran resisted internally as well! When it became clear that Pilot didn't feel the way Squirrel did, he wasn't sure if it was okay for him to love her so much (he didn't want to make her uncomfortable). Although he was still very kind to Pilot, he tried to suppress any indications of his romantic feelings for her. This didn't last very long, though, as Squirrel took notice (she shares memories with Pilot, even if she's not consciously present for the occasion) and brought it up, telling him it was okay to feel that way for Pilot, too. :)

Pre-relationship 7:

This is a bit of a tough one to answer with just Pilot? But I found a way to interpret it: if Squirrel never shared Pilot with him. Well, it would be hard to hide sometimes, and it would mean this icky feeling of secrecy and disingenuity(?), as well as guilt on Squirrel's end. Ultimately, it would be a disaster of a horrible lack of communication, and although it would be possible for them to stay together and work things out when everything blew up, it's slightly more possible that Squirrel would feel too guilty, like there's something seriously wrong with her mental state (b/c this wouldn't be very like her at all), and she'd at least suggest leaving him so he can find someone better than her.

...M,my heart aches now ㅠㅠ

But!! If you mean straight-up, Squirrel and Saeran...! Well, as I'm sure you can imagine, that's also angsty :'D

We all know how it goes for Saeran. Another extra year of torment from Rika and Mint Eye, and then Deep/Common Route.

Squirrel wouldn't be miserable, but she would probably struggle sometimes with the relative consistency in her life. And she does want a boyfriend — an eventual life-partner — and yet, the nature of her job would make it difficult. She wouldn't have as great of a support group, because her other friends, while close, don't have that same, seemingly unbreakable "family" bond that the RFA has.

Living alone with her two cats, running a podcast with her friends, failing to find someone she likes enough to date, dealing with the mental struggles of her work nearly on her own, as she steps into her second year of work...

...but then maybe, one day, a year later, she gets a sudden notification from a mysterious app, a mysterious guy... and when she's standing before the door with the number lock, and she tries — too late — to back out of this, she finds herself face-to-covered-face with a dangerously handsome stranger. [cue "assistant?" au—]

LOL but fr, Saeran would for sure have it worse. Squirrel would have some struggles of her own — maybe at some point quit working as an agent, or go part-time for her mental health — but she would survive life.

Maybe even start working part-time at a late night café, where she meets a quiet, blank-faced, and unendingly cute redhead with stunning mint blue eyes...

...I have too many AUs hehehe ^o^

[Questions are here!]

[gureishi]

Happy Valentine's Day, Grace <3

Eeeeeeeee thank you so much dear Faye!!!! The same to you darling ❤️

[marshmallowprotection]

Thinking about how Saeyoung only 'forgives' V in his after ending when he brings Saeran back (and even then not really, I think it's just the immediate shock of seeing Saeran again) and it made me wonder how he would feel about V after the SEs.

The last time they saw each other, the only thing holding Saeyoung back from physically hurting V (more than he did) was his own injuries - and not wanting to upset MC. Then, everything happens at Mint Eye and suddenly V is dead and Saeyoung seems to have let go of all of his anger.

Is it the same scenario as in V's AE, where the initial shock of grief over losing V makes his anger recede a little? Or is dying the thing that redeems V from what he has done?

I think that's an interesting question. I don't think I've ever thought hard about that before due to the immense hatred I know is inside of Saeyoung's hatred. We don't really see his reaction to V's death in the After Ending because he wasn't conscious when it happened. He has to be told AFTER the fact about what happened, by either one of the parties that witnessed it. I don't know who told him.

Jumin is one of those options, as is his MC, Vanderwood, or Jaehee. Saeran isn't going to bring it up. He's traumatized by what he's done to V. He didn't intend to shoot anyone that day. He was caged like an animal and reacted as such, his entire worldview crushed the second Rika admitted she never wanted him for Mint Eye, she wanted to use Saeyoung. Rika could've just as easily died that day as V.

So, I doubt anyone is going to bring that up around him. Neither is he going to bring it up. But, I have my opinions about SE Saeran that are not what you asked so I won't get into that.

This is about Saeyoung and his feelings. His feelings that never seem to change no matter what ending it is when he learns the truth of his life... and the lives of those around him. He hates them. He hates the lot of them for lying and using him... and Saeran. They were children. Children who needed help. They were played for fools like a fiddle in the devil's hand, and it's been years since Saeran was pulled into the lawless cult.

Saeran was tortured for YEARS.

It's not just the year that happens in Another Story. It's almost three years of absolute madness for Saeran. Saeyoung doesn't even get to know all the details of what happened, all he knows is Saeran had lost his mind in Mint Eye and was willing to do things he never would've as a child because of the brainwashing and cult manipulation in Mint Eye. That adds to Saeyoung's anger tenfold.

Think about how he feels in his Route when the truth comes out and he confronts V for the first time after Saeran gets kidnapped by the agency and Vanderwood.

Do you know why he mentions that V is the reason why he was put into the Agency? It was V who did that. V meet someone from that agency at an art auction and was talked into getting some help that way for Saeyoung. He thought it was like the "movies."

That's what he admits in a call with you during Saeran's After Ending. He was a young adult helping another child, but that doesn't excuse what he did. He was clueless. He didn't think harder about it. He just took that route because he thought it was for the best since he was afraid to ask anyone else for help (I.E. Jumin).

He damned Saeyoung to years of trauma that we're never going to know the extent of. We only see bits and pieces of what happened during his time in the agency because Saeyoung won't talk about it normally. The most we know is horrific, though. He spent days in a hot building thinking he was going to die by someone's hand or from the lack of food and water in that place. He almost died there. There are probably more times than that.

But, that's not even what Saeyoung is angry about. He could excuse the torture he suffered. But, he won't excuse what happened to his twin brother when he signed his lie away knowing that he might be forced to go through Hell. It was worth it if it meant Saeran was the happiest and safest person he could be. But, it was all a lie. It was a damned lie.

Saeyoung only holds back during this conversation with V because you're there. He doesn't want you to see him kill V with his bare hands in broad daylight. But, God, if you weren't there... he might've done it. I can't promise he wouldn't have done it. The anger is inside of him all the time and it won't leave. He wants everyone to suffer for what his brother went through. All of them.

I don't think he's over his anger in the latter half of the Secret Ending. He's bottling it up because Saeran is more important. The safety of his brother is more important to him than his anger. V is dead, he got what he deserved, he's angry he couldn't do that himself, but now he needs to protect Saeran from their father. He's fixated on that for a reason. If Saejoong found Saeran in the hospital, they'd be fucked in more ways than one.

He doesn't have time to fester on Jihyun Kim. V is dead. V is gone. He is in hell. That's what Saeyoung believes. He has to protect Saeran at all costs right now, and once he knows that Saeran is safe, I have no doubt in my mind he's going to have a crisis about that. How can he contend with that truth? Not that V is dead, but the fact that Saeran is guilty.

He has to come to terms with the fact that Saeran killed V, accident or not. He will be in denial about that. It's going to be complicated as hell.

If we see him shed any sorrow for V, I'm sorry, but it's a mask for the sheer fact that Zen and Yoosung don't know the truth. That's it. He's not in a position to talk about the truth. The RFA doesn't know all the facts. Only half of them do. V isn't redeemed for him, his anger at V doesn't decrease, we're just not seeing it because he's prioritizing his brother's safety right now.

I don't think it's anything like V's After Ending. I just genuinely think he's wearing a mask again and it's only a matter of time before you've got to talk to him about this because it's only going to fester inside of him. He needs to talk about this stuff. I hate that for him because he needs to have a healthy outlet but... it's Saeyoung. Old habits just die hard for him and he needs more time to focus on himself.

How does he confront Saeran's actions?

How does he let go of his shame over not being the one to do it?

How does he see the world knowing that he might never have all the answers he needed?

How does he face everything?

Saeyoung hates V, and he always will. But, the sad thing is that he'll never get any solid closure about it. I just hope he gets to talk about it with someone in a healthy outlet.