#broken items

[thrifterror]

How to get ahead in one easy step:

Buy this head

[thrifterror]

I don’t know if words can adequately express how unsettling I find this figure.

[thrifterror]

So... are these meant to be two-legged cows, or are we meant to assume that they’ve been sawn in half and mounted in horrifying taxidermy form atop the shelf?

[thrifterror]

No, no, no! You’re not supposed to launch the Angry Birds in real life! They’re not--

*CRASH*

[thrifterror]

Headless Harry and his dearly deceased wife Blue Bertha, found at Rataplan (a Dutch thrift store)

I’m glad to see that thrift figurine horror is an international affliction.

[thrifterror]

Bulbous legless one-horned cow is rightfully traumatized.

[thrifterror]

One-winged golf ball angel.

I’ll bet her theme song is not as epic as Sephiroth’s.

[thrifterror]

I’m sure these two were originally holding a bowl or something, but it’s better if you imagine their dramatic poses as part of some sort of choreography. I’m picturing a bunch of chimps snapping and stalking across the shelf, a la West Side Story.

Also, check that bear statue’s thousand-yard stare... Maybe he’s just trying really hard to ignore the simian floor show.