#btb reader

[okamirayne]

Hiii Rayne, it's me, the Naoki fan again. (⁠◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿⁠) I don't know which of my tumblr account will show up in your inbox, I don't know how to manage that, sorry. ^^" I know it was like years ago the last I checked in, but I'm like a ghost that keeps visiting my beloveds. How are you? x3 How's your original projects? I don't mean to pry or anything it's just that I remember you suffered a big burnout and I'm worrying about you. ^^" The world is not an overly kind place rn (at least that's how it looks overall to me), so I thought it important to send you something positive. BtB is still a huge part of my life, I know I told it to you repeatedly and sorry for being boring but it really had a colossal impact on my existence. Without BtB, I wouldn't be here today, I would've given up ages ago. So thank you again for giving me this beautiful story with it's complex and compelling characters and your insanely clever plots, your hauntingly beautiful descriptions and absolutely wild emotional rides. 💓 I feel like you poured a lot of soul into your works and it somehow touched me more than anything I've ever read. I really hope that life is kind to you and it'll give back what you already gave to a lot of people. Sometimes I have this mood when I just grab a cup of tea and sit down and just enjoy the fact that I can exist in the same world as you. It's really peaceful and comforting. I'd never get tired of your words when reading so I really wish that one day, you can publish your own books. I'd be there to get my paws on them, hardcover and signed edition I hope. 😸On a side note, I adopted a cat from my workplace (I'm a vet tech). A shelter gave her to us bc she was hit by a car and her femur needed steel implants to heal properly and we have kennels for these kind of cases. She would've ended up in the shelter's care when healed enough, so I just brought my work home. ^^ Of course, the paperwork is handled properly but still. What I wanted to tell you before I got into a mini rant is that her name is Karibi. Everyone refers to her as Robin but nahh, she doesn't like that either. With a soft K and a slightly purred R, she responds to Karibi. 😹 It's not original but it works for us. It's her in the picture. I called, she looked. (I hope it'll send you the pic. Never tried this before. ^^") We wish you a very beautiful day! 💞

Oh my Word, my dearest @winterrasden 💜🥰

What an absolute blessing and delight to hear from you, sweetheart.  You completely bowled me over. My reply took me a bit, not just because I keep stealing glances at your darling Kitty (still recovering from that 😭), but because I needed to re-read and process your words again after I was done mopping myself up off the floor – having melted into a puddle of pure and precious feels the first time around.

You went and did me in with your message.

But in the best and most beautiful way.

You hit me centre-mass, so forgive me if I’m all over the place in my response; I have no emotional Kevlar to defend my heart against the impact of what you wrote. I’ve gotta jump-start things inside my head that went blissfully offline whilst I was in full Floaty Feeling mode. Thank you for evicting me from my head and drop-kicking me into my heart – it’s a beautiful state of aliveness to be moved this way, despite my violent imagery…how else to describe how hard this hit me?

I’m going to try to organise my response…

I know it was like years ago the last I checked in, but I'm like a ghost that keeps visiting my beloveds.

I do so enjoy a good haunting. Thank you, my luv.

How are you? x3 How's your original projects? I don't mean to pry or anything it's just that I remember you suffered a big burnout and I'm worrying about you. ^^" The world is not an overly kind place rn (at least that's how it looks overall to me), so I thought it important to send you something positive.

You are so very, very sweet. Oh yes. A Big Bad Bitch of a Burnout. It’s had me seven times down, but I’m eight times up. Or at least I’m halfway into rising, swinging somewhat blindly as I go. Still, I consider that progress. Consider yourself a hand that's reached out to help steady me.  I mean that more than I can ever adequately express to you.  Thank you for your kindness. Sadly, you’re right…our poor dear world seems far more hostile than hospitable right now. Thank you for being a flame in the dark. Please know that your positivity hasn’t just been received, it will be paid forward.

BtB is still a huge part of my life, I know I told it to you repeatedly and sorry for being boring but it really had a colossal impact on my existence. Without BtB, I wouldn't be here today, I would've given up ages ago.

…I’m so fucking glad you didn’t. Please excuse my potty mouth. Boring? Oh, my luv, I promise you that nothing could be further from the truth. You’re not laying your gold at the feet of an ingrate over here. I treasure and value what you’ve given me with your message. Any writer graced with the blessing of knowing their words and their work helped a reader get through a dark night, or pass through a valley of the shadow? That writer is not the same after. Not if their heart is still operational. You don’t carry on normally after learning that. You can’t. It changes you. If readers only knew how much their words have changed me, helped me, gotten me through the stormlands when I’m seven times down. Your words impact my existence too, luv.

So thank you again for giving me this beautiful story with it's complex and compelling characters and your insanely clever plots, your hauntingly beautiful descriptions and absolutely wild emotional rides.

Goodness, thank YOU for reading it. For giving it sustenance. For giving ME sustenance. Thank you for helping me grow as a writer by engaging with a story that would never have been if not for readers like you, who took it into your head and heart. There is NEVER any guarantee of that. I’m so grateful it resonated with you and mattered to you. That love makes it worth the labour. 🫶🏼 

💓 I feel like you poured a lot of soul into your works and it somehow touched me more than anything I've ever read.

I did, I do…and now I don’t have words in any language to express how insanely moved I am by the fact that what I poured into my work touched you the way it did. That's alchemical and beyond my ken. 🥰

I really hope that life is kind to you and it'll give back what you already gave to a lot of people. Sometimes I have this mood when I just grab a cup of tea and sit down and just enjoy the fact that I can exist in the same world as you. It's really peaceful and comforting.

Thank you for your blessing, which is the right word, because it feels like so much more than a wish. I appreciate it. I also appreciate that my particular strain of madness can bring you some peace and comfort; and it’s a sentiment I echo back to you. Thanks for being here. For not giving up. I raise my tea and toast you, sweetheart.☕️

I'd never get tired of your words when reading so I really wish that one day, you can publish your own books. I'd be there to get my paws on them, hardcover and signed edition I hope.

Ah, from your lips to the gods’ ears, darling! 🩷🙏🏼 Publishing my stories is my intention, my goal, my reason to bloody be. Thank you (immensely) for your patience as I recalibrate and return to myself. I haven’t given up on my original works (nor shall I) and your interest and support in them means absolutely bloody everything!!!

And now....

⬆️ Basically me, reading your message, just about holding my British shit together (maybe)...and then you pull out a three-punch combo: Sweet Rescue-Cat Story + Moving Namesake (😭) + Squee-Inducing Picture....and I'm collapsing like some glass jaw jackass in an embarrassingly swift takedown. BUT CAN YOU BLAME ME? 😹Arrggh!!! That is such a perfect picture, and knowing the context makes it even more hard-hitting. 💕 I'm goo. On the floor. Unmoppable at this stage. Total ruination! 🫠 But bloody happy for it!

Thank you, Winterra.

Now...kindly take responsibility for the blast-radius of feels your impact left behind and accept the shockwave of love and appreciation coming your way! 💕🥰💕

Wishing you and your darling little Karibi (*discreetly sobs into teacup*) a wonderful week ahead, sweetheart. 💜☕️💜

[okamirayne]

okay so i caught up to hhu and i have to say i am very intrigued about where its going, its crazy to think its been ten chapters but feels like the plot hasn't started in earnest yet. i think im very ready for your sns, especially in how you write naruto in this fic, but especially how sasuke and shikamaru have no love lost between them (which has always been a great sticking point since the sasuke retrieval arc is shikamaru's first trauma)

Hey there, Anon! 😊

Aw! Thank you for your message and support, especially the vote of confidence regarding the SNS pairing. Always a daunting one to tackle! You make a solid point on the dynamic between Shikamaru and Sasuke — that was always itching to be explored.

I’m presently on ‘HHU Hiatus’ due to, well, LIFE cracking its whip (several whips, maybe a cat-o’-nine-tails) but I appreciate you reaching out to me over here to leave this encouraging feedback 🙏🏼 It goes a long way and that mileage matters. Cheers! 🥰

[okamirayne]

Hi Rayne,

I am an avid reader and a long time fan of yours.

I've been following your work for many years - starting all the way back from 2015 in highschool. I come back to your fics every now and then. It's one of those defining totems of the mid 2010s. I have specific songs, food, movies, fics, clothes that I remember when I think of this period of my life, and your fic is one of them. Shikamaru and Neji had me in such a chokehold that I remember feeling a little mad that you introduced me to this crack pairing (because there were no other fics to quench my thirst for them once I was done with BtB. Realisation hit me like ice water and I had legit fic withdrawals)

I remember binging BtB before an exam. Instead of preparing for the test, I decided to binge read the fic the whole night. Needless to say, my eyes were red and I had a terrible headache. Luckily, I was able to pass (with no flying colors, mind you, but I was able to score above fifty percent lol). But I didn't regret it at all!

You've influenced my writing style and the way I evaluate fics. I think you will forever leave a mark on whatever I write. I remember reading a blogpost about how we tend to absorb different styles of authors that we like as we get into our reading journeys. I have a very short list of authors I adore and yours is among them.

I remember reading about you working on some original fics many years and being so excited for them. I still check in every now and then, eagerly anticipating you publishing something someday. I'd love to support your creative endeavours.

I binged Naruto Shippuden recently and for some reason, Naruto and Sasuke really hit me hard at the end. Back in 2015, I was more drawn in by the side characters. I paid little attention to Naruto and Sasuke.

But upon rewatching the ending, I went down this rabbit hole of trying to find fics exploring their dynamic. Their characterization. All that pain and juicy history. Sasuke is such an intense guy. Like this quiet walking talking live-wire. He can be easily reduced to this angry broody stereotype as I've seen many authors do, but something about the flavor of his hatred stands out.

Naruto to me is deep. So deep and I've been in this fandom for so many years trying to find the depth that I want from him in fanfics.

Yes, he has a sunny persona. But his thoughts are so enigmatic to me. I feel his sadness, his pain, his anger. His empathy. But I think this man can very evasive.

I am not able to put into words why I feel drawn towards the idea of Naruto and Sasuke. It's just I can't think of one without the other.

When it comes to them, I get so dissatisfied when I go through the fandom in search for the particular flavor of characterization that I am looking for but don't get.

That was the case until I went through Heaven Hold Us. I was like 'what the fuckk' because both of them had me in a chokehold in whatever handful of scenes they were in! You are a wizard!

I don't know how you did it again! I mean, it is to be expected. You took side characters like Neji, Shikamaru, Gemma, etc. from the show and elevated them in such a natural way. You expanded their world like bringing a camera lens in and zooming in on the parts Kishimoto had whispered about and painted them in vivid depth. It feels like such a natural extension of the story.

So it's only natural you would do Sasuke and Naruto justice. You've satisfied my craving; that itch for great charactetisization! I'd love to pick your brain on these two and how you view them.

Hope you are doing awesome as always and may lady muse always smile upon you~

Oh wow. Hi there lovely Avid Long-Time Fan! 💕 

What an absolute treat to receive your supremely kind message and the amazing, tantalising, chakra-pill-energising, love and support.

💖🫶🏼💖 Thank you so much!  I’m honoured and very moved to know my writing and madness has had such an impact on you.

I've been following your work for many years - starting all the way back from 2015 in highschool. I come back to your fics every now and then. It's one of those defining totems of the mid 2010s. I have specific songs, food, movies, fics, clothes that I remember when I think of this period of my life, and your fic is one of them.

Whoa!  So amazing to know you still revisit the fics and that you’ve been on board since way back when.  Thank you! 🥰

Shikamaru and Neji had me in such a chokehold that I remember feeling a little mad that you introduced me to this crack pairing (because there were no other fics to quench my thirst for them once I was done with BtB. Realisation hit me like ice water and I had legit fic withdrawals)

Far be it from me (not that far, admittedly) to confess such dastardly sadistic tendencies but I’m honestly super chuffed to be responsible for such withdrawals - only because it means that what I put out there into the world of fanfiction resonated with you and touched you.  So, whilst I’m totally chanting “mea culpa”, I’m also really thankful you still took a chance on the BtB-verse. You’re awesome. Even if it did cause you to have one banger of a headache and compromised performance during exams *nervous laugh* Bless you. And kudos to you, btw, for scoring above that 50% despite the adverse effects of fanfic-bingeing! Hell, we’ve all been there lol, no regrets!

I remember reading about you working on some original fics many years and being so excited for them. I still check in every now and then, eagerly anticipating you publishing something someday. I'd love to support your creative endeavours.

Got me right in the feels. Thank you.  So. Damn. Much.  💕  Yes, I am still working on my original works – personal circumstances and unforeseen shitshows got in the way of them for a LONG time and have set me back, but still, I persevere.  I do intend to birth these babies.  I thank you for your patience and your willing to show support for my heartwork.  That means everything to me. Truly. 💕 

Naruto and Sasuke.  Ah, I loved reading your thoughts on these two.  I agree and feel the same insofar as their psychological depths remaining unplumbed.  It’s a juicy topic, for sure.

When it comes to them, I get so dissatisfied when I go through the fandom in search for the particular flavor of characterization that I am looking for but don't get. That was the case until I went through Heaven Hold Us. I was like 'what the fuckk' because both of them had me in a chokehold in whatever handful of scenes they were in! You are a wizard!

AW!  Bloody hell, that is another insanely awesome compliment and I’m so thrilled to know you enjoyed my portrayal of them.  I get exactly what you mean about searching for a ‘particular flavor of characterization’.  It’s such an amazing feeling to know that HHU has given you a hint of that flavour.  Especially when I was uncertain about treading into the ‘watch your step’ territory that is Naruto and Sasuke.  They are not as safe as crack pairings, and I would always want to do justice to them within the context of the BtB-verse.  If I have displayed some wizardry, then I’m so happy that you resonate with my particular strain of magic.  You’re who I’m writing for.  Or it wouldn’t impact.  So thank you for letting me know that it did/does.  You are magic right back at me. 💖

I don't know how you did it again! I mean, it is to be expected. You took side characters like Neji, Shikamaru, Gemma, etc. from the show and elevated them in such a natural way. You expanded their world like bringing a camera lens in and zooming in on the parts Kishimoto had whispered about and painted them in vivid depth. It feels like such a natural extension of the story.

Ah! Bless you so much for this.  That’s usually my aim when writing within fandoms.  To try to keep it as close to the original canon with wiggle room (sometimes, a fair bit of wiggle room) for divergence…so long as it doesn’t fundamentally bastardise the soul of the character.  One could argue against that, given that sexual preference or lived-through trauma might be considered (by some) as strong identity points, but I don’t write characters that way unless that’s the way they want to be written.

So, it's only natural you would do Sasuke and Naruto justice. You've satisfied my craving; that itch for great charactetisization! I'd love to pick your brain on these two and how you view them.

💜I’m incredibly happy to have fed your beast, my dear.  It never fails to bolster me to know that the characterisations are resonating with a reader.  The characters are, and always will be, the heart of the story.  You’re so kind and amazingly supportive to have given me this brilliant and beautiful feedback.  THANK YOU. I love learning what you love.  And as for sharing thoughts and picking brains when it comes to these characters, I’m all ears!

Hope you are doing awesome as always and may lady muse always smile upon you~

💖Aw, well rest assured that your message did a hell of a lot more than turn my frown upside down.  Lights in dark times are precious.  Thanks for shining your glowing support my way – you are immensely appreciated, sweetie. 

From your lips to the Lady Muse’s ears!

Big love and thanks. 💜🥰💜

[okamirayne]

Reread time. I had forgotten the heartbreaking beauty that your world produced. I still hope and have faith that one day the series will be completed. Our boys deserve to be happy.

Aww!! Heya, my dear @daedheart! 💜

Reread time

Wooo!!! 🙌🏼 I truly hope you enjoy your return visit to the BtB madness.

🥹 Thank you so much for the very sweet words and support 🙏🏼💜 Hugely appreciated, luv!

[okamirayne]

Happy New Year, Rayne!!! Thank you for writing BtB <3 I just reread the series and it is always such a pleasure :)

Aw! Happy New Year, @whatever-works ! 💜🎉🥂 Wishing you a blessed 2023. Thank you so much for revisiting BtB 💗 It touches my heart to know it still brings you joy to return to the series. So lovely to receive this message. Thank you! 🙏🏼💜

[okamirayne]

I was curious if you would ever write something else for NejiShika? I know you wrote a whole series for BTB (while also writing a ton of Original work, which, wow, you're amazing) but if you ever got another idea for NejiShika would you write it? Or is the BTB series a "just kind of happened" one time thing? I think I remember you once said you were inspired to write BTB because of a dream you had of Shikamaru and you found that Neji was just the perfect other half for that version of him and that's the only reason you started writing the pairing. I guess I was just curious if you would ever write something else with the pair since BTB is such an amazing series and I love your characterization of them. Also, is HHU the last one in the series? Or are you planning anything else? Sorry for the rambling, I just wanted to ask 😅

Hey there, Anon! Thank you for dropping by with your ASK, Luv ☺️

I was curious if you would ever write something else for NejiShika? […] if you ever got another idea for NejiShika would you write it? Or is the BTB series a "just kind of happened" one time thing?

Do you mean would I write more about them together in the BtB world? As in, additional stories to add to the BtB series. Or do you mean would I write an entirely different NejiShika/ShikaNeji fic outside the BtB-verse? Because yes to the former, no to the latter.

I think I remember you once said you were inspired to write BTB because of a dream you had of Shikamaru and you found that Neji was just the perfect other half for that version of him and that's the only reason you started writing the pairing.

Correct! I couldn’t see who Shikamaru was chasing in the dream, but when I began to follow the plot bunny consciously all roads led to Neji.

It was such an organic and intuitive thing, as well as a logical one. It was always meant to be.

I guess I was just curious if you would ever write something else with the pair since BTB is such an amazing series and I love your characterization of them.

Oh yes, I believe I would. Aww! Thank you so much! I’m super excited and happy to know their characterisations hit the spot for you. The characters are always my primary concern and I try my best to do justice to them, bearing in mind any creative leeway/divergence from canon with the story/pairings.

Also, is HHU the last one in the series?

Yes, insofar as a post-war conclusion. That said, the BtB story, right the way through from the first instalment to UtS, is meant to be a standalone series regardless of HHU. HHU is pure masochism on my part 🤦🏻‍♀️

Or are you planning anything else?

I never say never. Ideas pop up. It’s just hard to commit for several reasons.

1) Severe bloody Burnout recovery 😭 🔥

2) My brain currently holds 3 separate novel series, all of them big-world stories. Which is a hell of a lot to hold in my brain cavern.

These original characters and their worlds are my heart and my kismet 💜

3) I am clearly challenged when it comes to writing one-shots…I fail so hard…

4) The investment of time/energy vs the payoff of writing fanfic (especially when you’re a masochistic moron like me who writes LONG SHIT). Understandably, and rightly so, fanfic doesn’t pay for the investment put in, so a lot of the payoff for me (and a lot of fanfic writers) is the reader-feedback exchange regarding the story/characters (otherwise I guess we’d just write it for ourselves, you know?) and sadly readers don’t necessarily engage as much anymore even though they may devour the content. Which is why I absolutely adore, admire, and am so grateful to reviewers 💜; to those who did, still do, and who were so outstandingly supportive of me in the past and still are to this day. They are beautiful treasures. That’s why I always aim/aimed to deliver the best I can/could for them and not short-change them. I’d never have finished the BtB series without them. 💜

As for Rambling? No way! Absolutely no need to apologise!! I’m very, very touched you care enough about the series/characters to ask 💜

Thank you! ☺️

[okamirayne]

Hello rayne, i'm guessing you must receive tons of messages like this, plus I'm kinda late for the party but here I am. First of all, thank you for your breathtaking (heh) work on the BtB series. I'm not finished reading yet, but it kept me hooked for the past 1.5 month. Your style is phenomenal, I'm no writer (only during my lost hours when i have an obsession ..) but i was seriously awstruck by the way you navigated several intrigues into one seamlessly. Thankkkk you for being so dedicated !!

Hey there @reaper-in-starfleet!

Aw! Such a treat to hear from you, luv! Thank you so much for taking a chance on BtB. I’m super chuffed to learn you’re enjoying the series so far. 💗

Hearing from readers such as yourself means the world to me; no one is ever let to the party — I thank you for taking the time to drop me this kind message and let me know you’ve enjoyed my writing. I appreciate it immensely!

Thank you! 💜🙏🏼

[okamirayne]

Im even coming off anon now, because like ugh your stuff is so good... so many scenes i want to draw! And they are so Tender 😩💕 and brutal haha

I love how you brought into it how emotionally intelligent naruto is, that part of him gets forgotten so often...

Also im a Fan of hibari and his shameless flirting 😌

Oooh!! 😍💕

Artist in the house!! 🙌🏼 So excited!!! Super thrilled you’ve been inspired. ☺️

Ah yes, Naruto! I think for him to go through that level of loneliness, isolation, and neglect as a child…and to come out the other side with such a caring and sensitive disposition, suggests a healthy level of empathy and EQ.

I agree, it’s overlooked by his endearing “clown” persona. He’s got some interesting layers to explore. 🧡

Ha! Hibari 🤣❤️ I’m glad you enjoy his shameless flirting, luv! 😉