#burned bridge

[lovelyonme]

-the margins-

friend

to [me]

or

are

you

didn’t

yo

u

ha t e

forgive

I

…

[lost]

-lovely,

om

[the-feels-i-do-not-own]

Don't burn this bridge please, I'm still standing on it.

https://the-feels-i-do-not-own.tumblr.com/

[bitchcr4ft]

So pissed off, my fiancé and I were supposed to be taking over the apartment that we shared with my two friends (one of them has a 2 year old), we let my friend with the baby move in because she was in a rough spot and had no where else to go and I told her that the doors to our place will always be open. Now mind you, she has been using all of our stuff (shampoo, conditioner, RAZORS,our huge flat screen tv etc.), pretty much took over the whole apartment so my fiancé and I were pretty much trapped in our room because that was the only place to get some peace and quiet as there is a screaming child running around. She has settled in and become way too comfortable at OUR place then we would have liked , when originally we were doing a favor for her TEMPORARILY. Well get this, my other roommate (one without the child) is moving out (she had the biggest bedroom in the apartment, for herself). Tyler(my fiancé) and I were going to take over the big room seeing as it was going to become our apartment. NOPE, my roommate with the child (who only pays 1/3 of the rent ) decided she is more obligated to have the big room PLUS ALL OF OUR SHIT SHE HAS BEEN USING because she has a child. Now let me tell you, living with my two friends as been HELL. It has ruined our friendship beyond belief. Tyler and I spoke with my roommate with the child and told her how we want our own life, our own space and how if she is going to be moving in a couple of months, she can remain in the smaller room with her child till then. Well!!! Here's the kicker!!!! While Tyler and I were at work yesterday, she moved all of her shit into the biggest bedroom so by the time we got home, she was all moved in. I WAS RIPSHIT. So since literally everything in the apartment is Tyler and I(tv, tables, pots and pans, plates, cups, decor, EVERYTHING) we moved it into the room she moved out of, put a lock on it and now she can not use any of our shit. She wants to take advantage of us for doing her a favor then take over the apartment when she knew it was going to be ours? Fuck you. You will get what's coming to you, nature works in wonders that way. RANT OVER, most of you probably won't read this, that's fine but I needed a space to vent without having the drama of people I know in real life getting involved.

[hupperting-blog]

Cate Blanchett in the tv show Heartland (aka Burned Bridge), 1994.

[grave-prone]

First time in months I don’t sleep with my headphones in and I dream of him.

I think he finally made the same choice I did because his reaction was “what the fuck are you doing here?” and he wouldn’t come out of his apartment. And god he was shaking. Idk with rage or anxiety.

I don’t remember what I said to him while he was on the balcony. I don’t remember what he said through the closed windows. I just remember him turning his head away and his leg crossed over his knee bouncing away from behind the glass.

My brain still put us in our hometown. In a completely new apartment that’s deeply familiar to me but only in passing. I don’t think he lives there but that’d be crazy if he did. I’m sure his face looks the same but I don’t know it. I could only make him 14.

Of course I would only reach for him when I’m unhappy. Of course he’d be mad about it. I have been turning away from him in every dream and left him to be fertilizer for a tree whose roots grew wrong and idk if they’re poisoning me or just suffocating me. Idk if I need to tear them out or just trim them back. But… I know I should let him rest in peace.

Whatever equilibrium he’s created in his life, I’m happy for him. I don’t know if he could ever find happiness, but as little pain as possible.

[grave-prone]

“Your cigarette ash still clinging to my clothes”

Or

“The toxic byproduct of your fun lingers on me… and sometimes I still notice it.”

[grave-prone]

Hm. Another Ex is turning 30 in a week.

I shan’t text them…

[shadow-nocturne]