#bwehhhhhhh

[butchjolyne]

eternal sugar cookie has me acting unwise

[spinetacks]

🥺☀️💖

[peepabell]

sometimes i think too hard about how much of the disabling part of my disabilities is actually that im poor and have no access to public transportation. like someone with the exact same set of disorders and illnesses who had access to money and transportation would probably consider themself low support needs. but because im poor i cant access the education i would need to access the types of jobs that would be sustainable for me. because im poor i NEED to get a job and dont have the luxury of choosing one that might accommodate me. and if i DID have a nicer job "available" to me i STILL wouldnt be able to access most of them because i cant leave the house without someone else taking me. working the jobs available to me exacerbate my disabilities through both physical and sensory difficulty and high social demand. i have to pick and choose which medical help i get so that i can get to the help and afford it. because i have to spend more energy than i have in order to work i physically cant take care of myself on my days off. because i have to spend more mental strength than i have to work i dont have the bandwidth to self regulate in my own time. like. idk. its wild living under a system that takes no consideration for people like me, and im relatively privileged!! i HAVE people who are willing to take care of me and drive me places sometimes. i have (nearly) unconditional access to warm food and bed. im white and fem enough that most people give me the benefit of the doubt when i behave strangely in public. i can usually speak clearly and almost always type. AND im struggling!!! idk. my heart goes out to everyone who cant get the care they need. i wish a very downfall of the capitalist system that keeps all of us from being safe and supported. i hope a day comes when every single disabled person on earth is loved and fed and cared for and supported enough to like. live. to be allowed hobbies and choice.

[energysynergymatrix]

[sycophantic-facade]

bwehhgbies...

[eros-omophagia]

lil vent 👍 fictive bullshit

it's very strange to think i really only knew Light for 5 years before The End... i try to avoid thinking of him too often these days because i know I'll end up regressing in my behaviors and progress but it really does just feel crazy. i didn't think it would ever be possible for me to truly love someone else. i still feel guilty for my feelings for Ace sometimes. that isn't fair to either of us i think but it's difficult. trying to become a different person who's in control of its own life after being so consumed by that sort of devotion for so long is difficult. i don't want to be used anymore and that makes the guilt feel worse, especially because i know i tend to swerve in the opposite direction instead of just... letting it go. i was never meant to have an ego. i was always just supposed to be a servant to someone better than me. but everything has changed so much....

[wyrmpox]

i shouldn't be going to work i should be getting molested in my sleep. whatever!!!!!!!!

[wyrmpus]

holding down the "bweh" button for fifteen full minutes