#c505

[willitlookgoodonmetho-blog]

☀️ @makeupforeverofficial #artistrougecreme in #c505 ⠀ 📸 @theknightshots⠀ .⠀ .⠀ .⠀ .⠀ .⠀ .⠀ .⠀ .⠀ .⠀ #lipsticklovers #tbt #throwbackthursday #sunnies #sunglasses #blackgirlwhitegirl #blackgirlmagic #freckles #blondegirl #naturalhair #teamnatural #lipstickaddicts #lipstickswatch #lipstickswatches #makeupforever #mufe #mufelips #fotd #motd #confidence #bodypositive #thorragnarok #shorthairthor #beautyaddict #everyoneisbeautiful #spring #springlipstick #purplelipstick⠀

[tmblrphblogconfession-blog]

505) The thought of ending my life has always been in the back of my mind. Every night, when I’m all alone in my bed. The silence tells me to slit my wrist. Emptiness screams there will be no hope for a good day. If only there are proof that there is “life after death”, i am not here writing this shit. The total darkness as we know it, might just be the ending of our story. I’m at the point of my life where my pain and feelings are channeled through this kind of social tool. I don’t have someone real to talk to, because they always know that i am a happy person but they don’t know that what they see in me is the sole irony of the real me.

I was once a blogger, and i can say that you clicked the button “reblog” on some of my posts once or more. The reason I joined tumblr, is for the hope that someone can save me. But little do i know, that she would be one of those to contribute to my “exploration on life after death”. She was a nice person. I tried to break her walls and every time I punch through those walls, I can feel my heart beating faster. Until the very last brick on your wall, my heart didn’t skip a beat. As the walls collapsed, so did my heart. Why I am breaking your walls? I asked myself. You need not no saving. I was the one in tragedy but why I’m I the one who does the breaking of the wall. What’s even worse, is that you didn’t stop me. I feel like you totally planned it. Like how architects plans dream houses but you, you planned my downfall,, just like what humans do. You wanted to be a flight attendant but I’m no flight risk. I’m just scared for those in the plane with you. They will not know that the hi-jacker would be you.

I just feel so alone. And I am planning to leave this world that way. Isn’t it amazing how our own mind tells us to kill it’s own. More amazing is that being alone can contribute a lot to suicidal thoughts. I’m always around a huge crowd but that does not exclude the feeling of loneliness. It’s all about what you feel. I don’t save friendships, for the reason that I didn’t do anything to harm the friendship it’s just their decision to slip away from me, they just wanted to put the blame on me not for not making an effort for it.

PLEASE, FOR ALL OF THOSE BLOGGERS OUT THERE. DON’T EVER STOP TALKING TO SOMEBODY NO MATTER WHO THEY ARE. JUST A SIMPLE HI, IS A HUGE THING TO UPLIFT ONE’S FEELING. REALITY IS THAT, PEOPLE DON’T KNOW THAT THEY CONTRIBUTED TO THE THOUGHT OF SUICIDE. WHICH IS VERY DEPRESSING KNOWING THAT THE PERSON WHO COMMITTED SUICIDE HAS A PITCH BLACK HORIZON AHEAD OF HIM…

[narumanga]

[narumanga]

[smokasditte]

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