ATTENTION ATTENTION \\ Heph&D
If Dionysus were to be asked to pick a favorite member of his ever-so-fucked up family, and asked to answer genuinely, he'd be stuck between Hephaestus and Apollo. Hephaestus is his elder brother, his favorite brother, and he wouldn't be able to imagine a world without him. To Dionysus, Hephaestus is probably the best person (god) that anyone could ever even hope to encounter.
And, jeez, the guy deserved more than Aphrodite.
So, if Hephaestus wasn't going to make any sort of move on the Artemis front (Dionysus wasn't really all too gun-ho! Let's sail the Hephaestus and Artemis ship- she was a bit of a prude and that didn't fly well in parties, but, hey, the girl made his brother happy, soooo...) Dionysus would have to make the moves for him, wouldn't he? That was what a good brother would do. What a caring, kind, considerate brother would do.
Dionysus thought himself all that and more. Handsome, amazing, charming... The list went on and on and on. He figured he had to plan a nefarious plot- search through Hephaestus' things, find something that Artemis would like- a metal bow, arrow, deer, who knew? So, Dionysus waited, he bided his time and, when Hephaestus left his workshop, Dionysus snuck in and went through everything. He wasn't nosy, he was just... Looking for something, anything to help his plan further along.
Dionysus tore through everything he could, weapons, tools, electronics- everything was moved out of place and pushed aside for his quest. There had to be something that he could've possibly been able use, right? Soon enough, he moved to the drawers- there were too many too count, but he went through them- "What's this-" he said, eyes catching a folded piece of paper atop the desk that he hadn't seen before. Dionysus pulled his arm out of a drawer and sat on the desk, pulling the folded paper out from all the things it was under, his eyes scanning it, "This is gold," he said, smirk on his lips and new plot already unfurling in his mind.
Minutes later and he was sitting before the base's PA system, turning it on and holding the microphone to his lips, pressing the button, waiting after the long beep to speak, "Ladies and gentlemen, boys, girls, and gods alike- this is your favorite god, Dionysus speaking, and I've been chosen to do this task- a wonderful task indeed," Dionysus cleared his throat and unfolded the paper, "I have, in my hands, a lovely letter dedicated to our very own Sailor Moon from a guy we all know and love- good ol' Heph," a thought ran through him, that maybe this wasn't the best idea, but he dismissed it- this was helping, not hindering, "To my dearest Artemis," he began, "So many things I would like to say to you, but I haven’t the knowledge of such words. I wish I were Apollo, so then maybe I can write to you the way you deserve, but alas, I am not. I am not the god of Poetry so I cannot write a sonnet to you. I cannot woo you with my words. I am just a humble blacksmith for the gods and that’s how I shall remain..."
