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Ten Things that Could’ve Happened to Jenny Calendar

It’s my second attempt in writing for the Buffyverse. I’ve written this as a ‘what if’ fic, if the events of Passion had gone a little bit differently. Written as a fic for Calendiles day, I wanted to explore the possible paths that Jenny would’ve took. I’ve tried to place a bigger focus on Calendiles, although a little bit of Jenny/Lilah might have snuck into the fic. I’d like to thank Celia @jenny-calendar for coming up with such a great event.

Here it is on my AO3!

Note: Parts I-IV would’ve taken place around the time Passion would’ve taken place. Parts V and VI take place around ATS s1, and Part VII takes place after the events of A New Man. Part VIII would’ve happened alongside all the other shenanigans in Once More With Feeling, Part IX would’ve happened in BTVS late s7 and Part X takes place at the end of Chosen.

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I.

Willow blinked back at Jenny, her youthful eyes streaked with worry.

“A-are you sure?” The girl stuttered, in her own concerned way. “I mean, it’s a public place, and Angelus is still out there. What if he decides that, he wants to come hunt us down? Angel knows we do a, a lot of research in the school library.”

Looking at Willow, Jenny wanted to avoid saying something along the lines of ‘Hey, the chances of that seem pretty slim’. It would come off as artificially optimistic, given the serious, life-threatening reality of the situation.

“Hey. It’s no big matter. Teachers stay back in school all the time,” Jenny offered, shrugging. “Just go home, Willow, I’ll be fine,” She leaned back in her chair and stretched her limbs. “It’ll only be one more night at most.”

“You could come over to my place,” suggested Willow, with a sense of quick urgency. “I’ve got a computer round there, and I’m sure we can whip something up fast enough to de-invite Angelus. We’ve got everything we need! The rhyming couplets, spells, spices, everything we need to keep Mr. Broody off the welcome mat.”

Jenny cracked a smile at Willow’s humour. Turning back to her computer, she resisted the thought of following Willow home. After all, she’d prefer working on a computer she was familiar with. “It’s okay, I mean, how are you going to sneak me out of your house without your parents noticing?”

“Are you really sure it’s safe here?” Willow pressed her lips into a thin line, tugging her shirt nervously.

“Well, and if I turn into a vampire tomorrow, I’d give you the first stab opportunity,” suggested Jenny, hoping to see a smile appear on Willow’s face, but her expression had hardly changed from when she first came to seek Jenny that day. “That was a joke.”

Willow shrugged. “Alright then,” She turned to leave, but stopped short, swerving around. The motions sent her hair whipping around her shoulders like an amber curtain. “You know, you should really talk to Giles. He hasn’t been doing so well lately. And I mean, I can just see it, you miss him too, don’t you?”

Jenny thought for a moment. “Maybe. Maybe I do.”

–

II.

This was the second time Jenny hurled herself out a window.

Well, the first didn’t really count, considering that she was possessed by Eyghon, and it wasn’t the most pleasant experience. In fact it was possibly far from it.

Recent events flashed through her mind as she hurtled towards the ground.

The translation’s done, at least. My computer’s busted, though. Wasn’t there a disk? It’s possibly still out there. But there’s not much I can do if I don’t survive this. Oh, well. If it’s the last thing I’ll ever think before I go out with a bang, Buffy, I’m sorry I couldn’t–

The impact happened, and she heard a crunch. Relieved to find herself still alive, she scrambled to her feet in a panic, glancing up at the gaping hole the broken window left for a split second before making herself move. Brushing off the leaves from the pile she had landed in, sharp wisps of pain shot up her left arm, and she knew she had possibly landed herself a broken wrist, or at least sprained it. A cut slashed across her cheek dripped, wet. Trying not to cringe with pain, she pushed herself up to her feet, gritting her teeth so much she could hear them grind.

She didn’t know where Angelus was, but she had to keep on moving. Ignoring the arrows of pain in her lower back, she limped towards the car, her heart in her mouth as she silently counted down to the moment Angelus would finally catch up with her and grab her from behind, and drink.

Upon reaching her car, she let out a huge sigh of relief when she found that she had forgotten to lock her car and that she’d left her keys in the ignition - which could’ve been a bad move, honestly, but it didn’t matter any more as she sped off, not even stopping to buckle her seatbelt. After being chased and nearly killed by a rabid vampire, and leaping from the fourth floor of the school building and miraculously surviving thanks to a pile of leaves, dying in a car crash was perhaps the least of her worries.

Keeping track of Angelus was hard, since vampires don’t show up in mirrors, and it was very hard for Jenny to keep her eyes on the road and occasionally glance back to check that Angelus wasn’t tailing her. Honestly, it was made even worse by only having one functional hand to grip the wheel with, and Jenny had never held onto another object as tightly as the steering wheel of her car. It seemed that he was gone by the time Jenny pulled up outside Buffy’s residence on Revello Drive, but she wasn’t going to take any chances. Digging in the glove box, Jenny fished out a cross, which looked seemingly large enough to fend off a vampire approximately the shape and size of Angelus. (Does the size of a cross affect its effectiveness against a vampire? Something that she’d never considered, but Rupert probably had some scientific answer to that. Or at least, as scientific as the supernatural could ever get.)

She staggered out of her car, and towards the house as swiftly as she could manage, with all the resolve she had left. “Buffy,” Jenny croaked, her head spinning. Slumping against the front door like a rag doll, she gave three firm knocks on the heavy wooden door, all the while holding her breath and hoping that Angelus wasn’t still lurking around.

Jenny got a huge shock when the door gave way, and she could’ve tumbled across the threshold had it not been for Willow.

–

III.

Joyce let Jenny stay the night after hearing that the Sunnydale computer teacher was targeted by Buffy’s pale, brooding ex-boyfriend that very same night he personally paid her a visit at her doorstep.

“We can’t take you to the hospital, not right now,” Joyce fretted. “He might still be out there. Buffy, should we call the police and turn him in?”

“They can’t deal with him,” shrugged Buffy, taking a sip of milk from her glass. “We’ll take Ms. Calendar tomorrow morning. When the sun’s out.”

“What difference does it make?” Joyce inquired, raising her eyebrows. “What’s stopping him, from being on the lookout for us tomorrow?”

“Mrs. Summers, I think it would do a world of difference,” offered Jenny from the sofa. “Willow’s done her best with the first aid. I think I can hold out till tomorrow.”

Joyce nodded, in a not-exactly-convinced way. “Is there anyone you need me to call? Family?”

“You could try dropping a call to Mr. Giles. The school librarian. He’d be worried sick. And I don’t like the idea of him being out there. Angelus will use him to get to Buffy.”

“Angelus?” Joyce inquired, with a tilt of her head. “Honey,” she addressed her daughter, “is there something I’m missing here?”

“Uh, mom,” Buffy started, “I think we –”

“It’d be best if we could explain to you a little bit down the road,” Jenny cut in. “A lot has happened tonight.”

“Wait, so you need me to make a call to Mr. Giles?” Joyce reiterated.

“I’ve got his number memorised,” Jenny said, reaching for a pen. “I could write it down if you want-”

“He’s a good man. Comes around often. He’s very concerned for the children.” Joyce exclaimed. “Oh, and I also have it written somewhere around here.”

He comes around often? Does she even wonder why? Jenny pondered on whether Joyce even knew the truth about Buffy.

“That’s an interesting, art piece,” Jenny started, averting her thoughts. “the one’s that hanging on the wall. It complements the wallpaper.”

“Oh,” Joyce beamed. “Buffy’s always too busy to really stand there and appreciate it. She says it’s angry at the room. Oh, I said, she’s got the wrong idea.”

“It creates contrast,” Jenny observed the mask closely. “Where is this from?”

“Sub-Saharan Africa, I think,” Joyce recalled. “I’ve got so many of these around the house, I can’t remember the origins of them all.”

“That isn’t the only one you have?”

“I work for an art gallery. Sometimes I end up bringing my work home with me.”

“My grandfather did painting,” Jenny said, feeling a weak smile spread across her face. It was a long time ago, it took a lot of digging into the deepest recesses of her mind to find the particular memory. She was two years old, and her grandfather let her have one canvas, She splattered paint onto it with no regard at all, until he came around and took a look at her work. He took the canvas and skilfully worked around what was already on the canvas, transforming a series of random ink splotches into a lifelike image of a bird.

The memory warmed her, and she was so deep in thought she thought she could just forget whatever had happened that night, just for a second.

Glancing back at Joyce, Jenny wondered how it would be like to live on the Hellmouth without being aware of all the paranormal activity. Not knowing, in this case, would be much better than knowing the ugly truth about the sleepy little town.

–

IV.

Jenny wasn’t in school the week after the run in with Angelus.

Giles had heard that she was safe at Buffy’s, the night she was working late to finish the translation. He’d also heard about her trip to the hospital, but he’d only managed to pay her a brief visit the night after, and had to leave early due to late-night researching. Willow had managed to retrieve the disk containing the Ritual of Restoration from Jenny’s classroom, and he was working hard on it to decipher its meanings. He considered asking the Council for help, but they’d turn him away, saying that the matter was on a small enough scale for him to solve on his own. After all, it was only one vampire, not a whole army. Moreover, they would give the order to kill, which wasn’t what the team wanted to achieve, at least under these current circumstances. But why was he doing this? Perhaps it was much more for Buffy’s sake than his own. Either way, he had to work fast, Jenny’s run in with Angelus was simply too close for comfort this time.

He was intensely deep in thought when he realised he had almost missed the phone call that came in on the library phone. In a hurry, he snatched up the receiver. “Good evening, this is Mr. Giles, the Sunnydale High librarian. How may I help –”

“Rupert.”

“Jenny. I’m so sorry I haven’t been around, I –”

“Could you meet me at my apartment? There’s something I need your help with.”

Giles pulled up outside Jenny’s apartment block within ten minutes of her call. Pushing his glasses up, he began to climb the stairs leading to Jenny’s apartment on the third floor of the small, dark block. It was rather late at night, and he was tired - so tired that he nearly leaned on a wall against his satchel. That was close, he mused, thinking about the fragility of the object that lay tucked in a small drawstring bag within his satchel. He honestly didn’t know what he expected from Jenny at this point. Maybe she’d be excited to see him and things would go back to the way they were. Upon reaching her apartment, Giles was appalled to find her front door unlocked. Considering her run-in with Angelus, he thought she’d be more careful about her security. And if supernatural threats weren’t enough, there were also the day-to-day human threats such as a break-in.

He wasn’t expecting to see Jenny leaning on a crutch and attempting to cram a wall decoration into a cardboard box.

Her apartment wasn’t filled with them yet, giving him an indication that there would be still some time before she moved out, but it would happen soon. How soon is soon? He wondered, staring at the cluttered room.

Jenny looked up, brushing a lock of hair out of her face with her right hand, wobbling a bit. She turned, and Giles noticed that her left hand was in a sling. “Sorry,” She mentioned sheepishly. “Should’ve told you about-”

“No worries. You have your reasons, I suppose,” Giles assured. “But I feel, that I should perhaps know your reason for leaving before you do so.”

“You want to know?” Jenny said. “No problem, I can just tell you my reasons. No beating around the bush, no lying by omission, I’ll be very honest with you.”

Giles helped her into a chair, and pulled over another one for himself. “You shouldn’t be standing. If I remember correctly the doctor did say to-”

“Keep strain off my back, yeah,” Jenny cut in. “So. What do you want to know first?”

“You could begin wherever you feel like starting. It’s your story, after all.”

“I’ll be willing to restore Angel’s soul. Then I’ll leave,” Jenny put forward, watching for his reaction.

“And that’ll be…?”

“A couple of weeks, perhaps, after I recover,” Jenny shifted in her seat. “I feel I’ve done enough. To be very honest, I wasn’t sure how exactly to follow my family’s wishes and stay and monitor Angel, but it seems that I got caught in the crossfire. I got involved in some events around here that I think I wouldn’t want to be involved in again. Such as that night I was possessed, that was awful.”

“I want to take a break, Rupert,” Jenny said, making eye contact with him. Giles found Jenny’s hand slip into his, intertwining their fingers. “It’s not that I don’t trust you. I do, it’s just that I need some time away from all the monster activity here on the Hellmouth. I need a bit of time, to process what’s happened to me. To us, and I mean all of us. You, me, Buffy, Willow, Xander, and the others.”

“I don’t think I can keeping doing this. I haven’t slept for more than two hours consecutively in two weeks because of-” Jenny took a breath, her shoulders shuddering, “-the nightmares. I can still recall every detail in excruciating detail.” The way the wind moved around her as she scampered through the school like a rat. The venom in Angelus’ voice as he taunted her, waiting for her to walk to my death. The crisp, ugly smell of the leaves which she happened to tumble into, saving her life. “But now I can’t even look at the leaves on the trees around my apartment and not think of what happened that night,” She glanced at the window. “That’s why I drew the blinds.”

“I think I could never understand how you felt that night, and I can comprehend your reasons for wanting to leave Sunnydale.”

“Nobody needs to know,” Jenny insisted, her voice firm. “Nobody needs to know what Angelus’ did to me that night. What matters is that I know that once we find a way to restore his soul, we can forget what Angelus did.”

They sat in silence, glancing at each other by the soft light of the table lamp.

“H-how long will you be away?” Giles started. “No, that shouldn’t be a question I should be asking-”

“A few months, a year maybe. I don’t know,” Jenny sighed. “But I’m sure I can’t be away from here for long. I’m just packing all this stuff so that I won’t be returning to a messy apartment. I thought it’d be nice if I could start anew once I got back.”

Giles changed the subject. “I’ve managed to sort out the ritual, and we just need the respective materials. I believe I should be free tomorrow to pop down to the Magic Box and pick up some spices.”

Jenny turned to her dining table, where bowls of herbs and spices were placed around an empty stand. “All I’m missing is the Orb. Angelus broke it into smithereens when he paid me that little visit.”

“I thought I’d bring my Orb over. Well, prior to this, I was using it as a paperweight. I didn’t know it was intended for cursing the souls of vampires. I presumed that your purpose for inviting me over tonight was to attempt the re-ensoulment. Well, I don’t suppose I was absolutely sure, but I brought it along in case you wanted to-” Giles fished in his satchel and brought out the hemp drawstring bag. “-give it your best try.”

“I have the ritual on paper, if you require it.”

“That’s wonderful of you,” Jenny smiled, and rose from her seat. “But there’s no need for that. Cordelia came over one day and lent me her laptop. I’ve got most of it in my head now, or at least I think I do. And if I’m having a hard time remembering, don’t prompt me. It might break my concentration.”

Giles nodded, confirming that he understood her instruction. “And you didn’t tell me you were working on it?”

Jenny gave him a knowing smile. “I don’t have to report everything to you.”

“Then why invite me?” asked Giles.

She thought for a little while, staring into blank space. “Just in case something goes wrong,” she said, her voice softening towards the end.

“But I have absolute faith that you’re capable to conduct the ritual on your own.”

Jenny sighed. “Then take it as an excuse for me to see you again, then. I missed seeing you.”

She took her place across the dining table, glancing over the layout of the ritual. Tentatively, Giles placed the crystal sphere upon the stand. Jenny was silent for a moment, before closing her eyes and concentrated.

Then her lips were moving. A slow whisper, barely escaping her lips at first, and growing with rapidity and volume, rising in a crescendo with her conviction. At one point she seemed to be struggling to remember a verse or two, her speech slowing, and Giles almost wanted to prompt her when she regained her composure and resumed with the ritual. Her fingers tapped on the table, aiding her in her concentration as the ritual continued. The moment everyone had been anticipating came when the Orb started to flicker with a dim glow, which spread across the entire globe and resulted in a full glow. Jenny opened her eyes as the glow faded, keeping her eyes trained on the Orb at first, and then directing her gaze up to Giles.

“It’s done,” Jenny remarked, her voice a shaky tremolo. “Angel’s soul has been restored.”

“How would we know?” Giles asked. “I don’t intend to be skeptical, but I’m still rather concerned that something might’ve gone wrong and he might still be a physical threat.”

“I thought you said you had absolute confidence in me,” said Jenny, raising her eyebrows.

“I won’t lie, I was completely sure,” shrugged Giles, crossing his arms.

“If he has a conscience, I’m sure Angel would know what to do.”

“He would leave. To keep himself away from Buffy,” deduced Giles.

Jenny frowned. “I think we might have done the opposite from what we wanted to do, for Buffy to be able to find him again and-”

She dropped her hands. “-she’ll never forgive me for it.”

“I’m sorry,” Giles put an arm around her, and Jenny leaned into his shoulder.

“These are the choices we live with, I guess,” Jenny gave a weak, cynical smile. “And I guess the choice I’ll have to live with is leaving this place.”

“You’re not obligated to stay in one place if you find that circumstances become too much to simply bear,” Giles advised, running his thumb under the scar that marked Jenny’s cheekbone. “I don’t want to come across as overly sentimental, but–”

“Just say it.”

“I’ll always be in love with you.”

Jenny snorted, trying to cover it up in the next instant. “There’s no need to be overly sentimental, as you said.”

“I thought you told me to go ahead and–”

“Shut up and hold me,” urged Jenny, and she closed her eyes as she found herself completely reluctant to leave him.

–

V.

It was a year or so later, and Jenny didn’t know how she got herself into such a whirlwind. The nightmares continued, but work and exhausting nights dulled the vividity of the memories. LA was a frenzy of fast-moving, high-achieving workers, and it really was a dog-eat-dog world when it came to looking for a job. It took her months to score an IT job at the bank, and even so she wasn’t very welcome, as a lady looking to work in the IT department. Her co-workers weren’t exactly the most friendly people in the world either. It seemed all of the compassion and earthiness she’s seen in the people of Sunnydale was completely absent here, a grey cold mass replacing the warm, loving heart.

Jenny’s current girlfriend would probably mention, in a half-joking matter, that she was heartless in the first place, and there wasn’t anything to replace.

Was girlfriend the right word? Jenny wasn’t too sure that was really the case, for it was more of an agreement rather than a relationship. It was more like a friends-with-benefits situation, and even that probably couldn’t even cover it. Lilah Morgan worked in strange ways Jenny couldn’t fully understand, but she brought in much excitement and passion when needed.

Lilah was probably the most passionate lawyer Jenny had ever seen. They’d met at a bar two months ago, and had hit it off pretty well. After half a dozen drinks, Jenny woke up on her sofa half-dressed and with a hazy memory of what had happened, with Lilah sprawled across the sofa, out like a lamp.

We’ll keep in touch, Lilah had said. And keep in touch it did. What seemed to be a one night standoff turned into weekly visits, and weekly visits turned into nearly-daily visit. There was hardly a night where Lilah didn’t pull by Jenny’s place after work. Jenny deduced that Lilah was either one, enjoying her physical contact so much as to swing by for it on a daily basis, or two, invested in their relationship, which didn’t quite suit a woman like Lilah.

Jenny enjoyed Lilah just as much as Lilah enjoyed Jenny. She looked forward to nights of passion, those nights where she’d much rather prefer to lose all control of her inhibitions. It helped her forget, sometimes, about why she left her old life in Sunnydale. For a while she was nobody. Not a person with a heavy past, not a person with trauma from a near-death experience, not a person seeking anything but escape from her past. She was just Jenny, and Lilah was just Lilah. She melted under every single kiss and touch, and the sensations weren’t as complicated as when she kissed Rupert (ahem, Jenny. Live in in the now). Their relationship was nothing but the physical processes of passion, but Jenny found it a feasible albeit unhealthy distraction from her reality. Sometimes the nightmares disappeared, for a night, and Jenny felt more relieved than ever when she woke up. However, where Lilah would’ve slept the previous night, there would be ghostly imprints of her body, and Jenny sometimes stared at it until she had to smooth it over and pull over the duvet.

Jenny lay on her side and traced her gaze across the curves of Lilah’s body, veiled by the thin blanket she had pulled over herself. Better enjoy her when it lasts, Jenny thought. Lilah would be gone by four in the morning - how on earth did that woman run on two hours of sleep a night?

Then again, Lilah was probably the most assertive person Jenny had ever met. She could probably order her inhibition to sleep to stop meddling and being an inconvenience in her life and it would listen to her.

Lilah had that way with people. That kind of dominating charm that was almost irresistible. The way she picks up the phone and speaks orders into it, in a I know what I want and I will get it kind of tone. The way she’s able to sway juries to her discretion: a 93% acquit rate? Well, that came from the blazing red lips of Lilah Morgan herself, and Jenny could admit that certainly sent shivers down her spine as Lilah worked her way down through – never mind, but that was pretty damn impressive and intimidating.

Lilah was never a safe haven, and Jenny knew that.

Conflicted, Jenny wondered how much of Lilah’s sweet yet poisonous venom she had tasted.

–

VI.

“You’ve followed me around enough,” Jenny called to the dark figure in the alleyway.

A familiar face emerged from the alleyway.

Jenny froze, then relaxed.

Angel clasped his hands together. “What brings you here?”

“Oh, as if you have to know.”

“You’ve got Lilah Morgan’s scent all over you. By chance, have you-” Angel crossed his arms.

“Been sleeping with her? I remember how great your sense of smell is, and I can’t even deny that it happened because you know. How has it been, being a bloodhound?” Jenny exasperated.

“I know we aren’t on the best of terms but there’s no need to be sarcastic.”

“What have you been up to, then?” Jenny insisted. You’ve found out about the details of my love affairs, it should only be fair that I should know a bit about what you’ve been doing after you got your soul back.”

“Detective agency.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“Jenny, there’s something about Lilah-”

“Who are you to judge her?” Jenny put her hands on her hips. The sky rumbled overhead with thunder. “Look, I’d like to keep out of the rain as much as possible, if you’d just-”

“That’s not thunder.” Angel said, peering over Jenny’s shoulder. “Now, don’t move.”

Jenny normally wouldn’t have listened to a man who had tried to kill her a year and a half ago, but Jenny didn’t seem to have a choice. Her legs were glued to the ground, like she was being pulled under.

“Okay, what’s going on.” Jenny muttered under her breath. “If you’re doing this to me I swear-”

“Umbra demon. Latin for shadow,” Angel noted. “I’ve got an associate who can get rid of that for you.”

“Where did it come from?” Jenny inquired, her limbs itching with energy. She wanted so badly, to move. The urge was tugging at her impulses, but at the same time she had the feeling that it wasn’t her own impulses.

“Plays you like a puppet. It’s submitting you to the caster’s will. If you move, the demon will consume you, and you become the demon.” Angel explained. “And the thunder - this demon tends to be a bit melodramatic. It sensed danger, probably me.”

Deep in thought, Angel took a few paces back and forth. “Angelus ran into one before he got his soul back, the first time. It wasn’t a pleasant experience.” He took out his cellphone, and audible clicks were heard in the silent alley as he punched in a string of numbers. “Umbra demon. Possessing a woman, also Sunnydaleian…hey, I can’t come up with my own terms now? Also, a protection spell. Pronto.” He hung up, meeting Jenny’s gaze. “It probably won’t be too long before he gets here.”

“Don’t you dare mention Angelus again.”

Angel nodded.

“There are quite a few of our acquaintances from Sunnydale residing in LA as well, isn’t that so? I remember seeing Cordelia on that toothpaste commercial. I was almost convinced, but-”

“It’s always those overly-optimistic ads that get you, isn’t it?”

There was a pause, before Jenny changed the subject. “So. Umbra demon. How did it get on me?”

“The ritual’s complicated. For one, it requires a scream from the person it’s cast on.” Angel raised an eyebrow. “I think your current relationship was convenient for Lilah.”

“But why her?”

“Lilah hasn’t told you everything, has she?” Angel questioned, shifting his weight from one foot to another. “You don’t know about her work?”

“She’s a defense lawyer, that’s all I know,” Jenny put forward, defensively. “What right would I have to pry into her legal affairs?”

“She represents demons, Jenny.”

“God,” Jenny gulped. “The very thing I’ve came here to escape from. There were simply too many in Sunnydale.”

“And I don’t mind explaining a bit more, in fact I’d prefer for you to know the whole truth, but I’m sure the Senior Partners are watching. For now, you’re going to have to stand very still until my associate arrives.”

Jenny took a deep breath. “Why are you doing this for me?”

“I help the helpless. It’s in my job scope.”

“No,” Jenny interrupted, “wouldn’t you have thought I’d harbour feelings of hatred for you after you tried to kill me that one time?”

Angel went quiet for a moment. “I’ve made it my mission to atone for all the things I’ve done as Angelus. Sure, I wish I could separate myself and Angelus and treat them as separate people, but that just isn’t how it works. We are one. Except I have a soul, and that monster doesn’t.”

“You know I haven’t forgiven you yet, right?”

“I don’t expect my victims to forgive me.” Angel’s tone was stoic, his face almost blank.

Jenny made a faint wheezing noise. “Angelus’ victims don’t have the chance to forgive you because they’re dead. I, however, am one of the ‘lucky’ few who have managed to escape Angelus’ clutches and emerge alive. But you won’t understand how I felt afterwards. I couldn’t sleep. I could hardly eat. I could hardly step out of the house and it felt like the possibly the most imprisoning thing that I’ve experienced and will probably experience for the rest of my life. You won’t understand, not ever, what I have to live with.”

“That’s why your people cursed me,” Angel brought up. “So I could feel.”

Jenny was speechless, as she softly wept.

–

VII.

Jenny clasped the charm in her hand, trying very hard to think of something other than the tears as she watched the scenery move by.

“The charm should obscure you from the view of the Senior Partners. The process to bind the spell to the charm was rather challenging, but it will eventually serve its purpose. Lilah won’t be able to track you, and I presume that she’ll be looking for you after you’ve up and left.” Wesley had said, while passing over the totem.

“And an angry Wolfram and Hart employee is definitely more that what you need on your hands.”

Honestly, Jenny was happier than ever to return to Sunnydale. LA was far too gritty for her. If she had stayed any longer, she would’ve probably turned into one of those cold-hearted work machines. Or maybe she’d be seduced to the dark side of the law and supernatural, courtesy of Lilah Morgan.

Jenny got off the bus and walked around, stretching her legs. After dropping her bags off at her old apartment, which she had chosen not to sell when she had left, she took the bus to the bus stop across from Giles’ apartment. She had planned to knock gently on the door, and offer a plain, awkward explanation when he opened it, and they’d end up embracing each other and –

Giles’ door was left open, eerily similar to the way her own door was left when he paid her that visit where he watched her re-ensoul Angel.

Jenny’s heart ached as soon as she stepped through the threshold.

Books were left open all over the table, and empty bottles littered the floor in a messy, irregular formation, very unlike Rupert’s neat and uptight attitude. The television was on, blaring old music from the 60s and 70s. Laid out on the floor were dozens of records - he’d been keeping himself busy. What scared her most was the bannister, which had been ripped in half. There had been other marks of damage being done to the building, but most of them had been repaired, save for the bannister. Perhaps it was taking longer than usual for the contractor to get back to him.

Jenny found him slumped over a glass of whiskey in the kitchen, silent and unmoving.

“You look awful,” Jenny started. Okay, maybe this wasn’t the best way to greet a lover after you’ve been away from them a year and half, but it was still a start nonetheless.

Lazily, Giles propped himself up with an elbow on the table. “Jenny?” He mumbled, in a hazy state of exhaustion. “You’re an angel.”

“Thanks, but we really need to get everything cleaned up. And you need sleep. You look like you haven’t slept in days. What happened?” Jenny wrestled the glass from his hand, and seeming like the looks of it this was probably his second or third glass, since he wasn’t as incoherent as Jenny had expected him to be. He wiped his face with the green wool of his sweater, pushing his glasses up. It honestly amused Jenny, how he looked so different when he was out of his tweed suits. He wasn’t Mr. Giles, the stuffy British Watcher guy. He was just Rupert, another fellow normal human being struggling with life, just as she was.

“Bloody Ethan, thinking he can just barge back into my life and ruin it all,” He swore strongly, and with conviction. “You think he might’ve heard about you?”

“Now, I’m not very sure what he thinks about me, but I think it’s time for you to get some rest,” Jenny hauled him out of his seat, dragging him to the sofa. “I still have questions about that bannister though.”

“Ripped it out,” Giles revealed, shielding his eyes with the back of his right hand. “Would you turn down the lights? I’m having such a sodding headache I-”

Jenny reached over and flicked off the light switch. “Ripped it out, huh. Must’ve been some hangover.”

“I’m not hungover. Just even more sleep-deprived than usual.”

“The bannister, I mean.”

“Spells,” Giles mumbled. “P-probably something he put in my drink or maybe when he came round afterwards. I woke up a Fyarl the next morning. Of course it would’ve been a fright, waking up to find myself with more horns that I usually do.”

“He was here?”

“I don’t even know how we got back. We were both sloshed out by the time they cleared up. I can’t even remember what spells we did, maybe some of the old ones. It was nice, probably. Well, I still can’t remember a bloody thing we did. He left before I woke up the next morning.”

Giles groaned, shifting to a lying position on the sofa. “Spike decimated my car. Should’ve never trusted him with that thing. My trusty Citroen, i-it’s been with me for years.”

“Spike, as in William the Bloody Spike?”

“He’s been bugging us. Says he’s been neutered, but he’s not much better off now than dead. Can’t even feed, the poor bugger.”

Jenny retrieved a glass of water from the kitchen, putting it by the sofa. She pulled a chair over, lifting it off the ground so it wouldn’t make screeching noises. She had enough experience with headaches – from quite lately, after nights of drinking with Lilah.

“So. I heard we’re both out of a job. Sunnydale High blowing up was kind of a big deal. Was in the newspapers in LA. People said it was school kids with homemade explosives. I’m not absolutely convinced.”

“I was out of a job even before that. The Watchers’ Council fired me.”

Jenny’s gaze softened as she took Giles’ left hand, tenderly grasping it with both of hers. “I don’t think you’ve been a bad Watcher. You’ve been a great mentor to Buffy, I can see it. You’ve really had a great bond, the two of you. You were there for her, weren’t you? You were always there to advise and guide her–”

“Maybe a bit too much. They replaced me with someone else because of my emotional attachment to the Slayer,” He paused, reaching up to press on the bridge of his nose, “but she doesn’t need a Watcher now. She’s doing well in college, and here I am, playing an increasingly redundant role in her life.”

“Replaced you?”

“Last year. They fired him too over a dispute with a rogue Slayer, and with Buffy herself,” Giles recalled, a tone of disdain in his voice. “Good riddance.”

“What, was he that bad?” Jenny exclaimed.

“Amazingly, spectacularly bad,” He cleared his throat. “He left Sunnydale in less than half a year after he arrived.”

“Speaking of leaving Sunnydale,” said Jenny, “something happened in LA.”

“We’re always being watched. Most of the apocalypses that go on here, they’re part of a bigger plan.” explained Jenny, trying to put it across in a way that wouldn’t stir his curiosity. No, Angel had told her not to tell, tell nobody at all, it was his business and his business only. The less people knew about the Senior Partners, the better, but it wouldn’t have mattered anyway.

“They might be tracking me, which is why I was given a charm.”

“Who did?” He was suddenly more aware. “I don’t suppose I’d have anything against the person who made it, but I’m interested to know. Spellcasters are quite hard to come across, and many of them I’ve come across in recent years turned out to be more malevolent than anything else.”

“I ran into Angel again. He was working with a bunch of people. The one who came up with the charm, he was definitely English. Like you.” Jenny said. “Maybe he was a Watcher or something.”

“Jenny, you can’t just assume everyone who grew up in England is a Watcher.” He joked, eyes half closed.

“Wesley.”

“Come again?”

“The one who did the charm. I was thinking if you’d happen to know him.”

Giles sighed. “My awfully incompetent replacement.”

“Hey, he’s got a bit of an esteem problem when I met him, at least he hasn’t let me down yet. The cloaking spell’s probably still working because I’m still alive and not brainwashed into working for a interdimensional law firm,” Jenny caught herself. “I mean, that was just an example of something that could happen to me.” She let go of his hand, grabbing a quilt from the far edge of the room and draping it over him. “Sleep well, you need some quality rest. You could ask me about how my time went later,” she doted, planting a light kiss on Giles’ weary forehead before closing the curtains.

“I’m glad you’ve returned, Jenny. Life wasn’t quite how it was without you,” yawned Giles, turning over to lie on his side.

She waited for a couple of minutes until he was asleep. She silently paced around his flat, aware of his muffled snoring that hung ambiently in the air. She watched him for a minute, taking in every line and contour that made up his face, determined to remember it forever, if they were to ever separate again.

She’d forgotten too much of him when they were away, as much as she hated to admit it.

Honestly, she didn’t want to reflect on her time in LA. She wasn’t sure how to explain her meeting with Angel. It still lingered on her mind, and the memory wasn’t likely to dissipate any time soon.

Jenny stepped out of the stuffy flat, listening to the sounds of the town as the sun set. Sunnydale had survived yet another day. Sitting on the tiles lining the small pond of water, she let go of her inhibitions and a decently good cry about the events that’d happened in the previous years.

She’d missed being able to show her sadness during her time away. It seemed that she was trying too hard to let go of her past immediately upon reaching, and now she decided to let things take their own natural course.

–

VII.

Life’s a melodrama, Jenny sings. But she doesn’t know the real reason she’s singing, the real reason why she’s draping herself over the Magic Box counter like some lovelorn shop girl in need of someone who will sweep her off her feet and carry her away to some sweet conclusion to a story she’s been running from – doesn’t she already have that sweet bliss, in the form of her dear fiancee?

I’m holding Buffy back, holding her back from life itself, returns Giles, in a duet he doesn’t realise how it even started in the first place. He’s singing his heart out, not like how he used to mumble verses in his flat back when he was serving as Buffy’s Watcher the first time, not like how he sang with limited freedom at the Espresso pump when she went off to college. This was a new level of freedom – he poured his whole mind and soul into the melody.

Jenny and Rupert sang against a backing orchestra nobody could see, or was really conscious of. Jenny thought she heard the scrape of a violin in her left ear, but reason told her that it was ridiculously impossible, but then again nothing really was a hundred percent impossible in Sunnydale.

You can’t leave, started Jenny, she’s not ready to stand on her own

She’ll learn, she’s competent, Giles continued the phrase, what she’s gone through hardens her

At least think of Dawn! Jenny’s raised her voice hoping to make a point. Tragedy after tragedy had hurt the young girl, and it changed her in more ways than one. It was hard enough for all of them to deal with Joyce’s death and Buffy’s death and her resurrection, but it must’ve been unbearable for young Dawn to struggle with the loss of those closest to her, those who vowed to always be her family. If you leave, she loses the only father she’s known

She’s leaning on me too often, she won’t learn to live her life again unless I go, Giles’ voice wavered towards the end of his phrase. Jenny made small, lilting, dance-like strides as she neared him, resting a hand on his shoulder. He took her in, completing the position, and the two swayed to an invisible waltz.

I’m sorry, I can’t leave when you do, Jenny sang, raising her gaze. His eyes were wavering as his voice was, but the pale green hues entranced Jenny nonetheless. She had loved the man behind those calculating, inquiring eyes more than anything else, but she wasn’t willing to drop anything and everything just for him. She didn’t always agree with his logical ways, but she still loved him all the same.

But she couldn’t stand being away from him again.

“I’m just as sorry as you are,” whispered Giles, leaning in to meet her lips. Jenny reacted tenderly, reaching up to pull him even closer. Her mind whirred; although his kisses were no longer electrifying, she enjoyed the intimacy that they brought – two entwined souls, the fate of their timelines. She couldn’t let him go, not ever again. He was her support; she was his. She was his happiness; he was hers. They depended on each other, giving and receiving as much as they could.

They remained in the silence, lost in the presence of each other.

“Giles, have you seen the –”

There was a bit of a scuffle as Jenny pushed away from him, turning to meet Willow. “The new stock of newt eyes are in,” Giles announced, grabbing the handkerchief from his breast pocket and discreetly brushing it over the corners of his mouth. “I’ll bring them out here, if you want.”

Jenny blushed, feeling the heat all the way from her cheeks to her toes. Her fingers found the engagement ring and fiddled with it, all the while avoiding Willow’s gaze.

The redhead was trying her best not to snigger. God knows what she would’ve been thinking. I totally called it when I was in high school, perhaps?

And to be absolutely honest, Jenny wanted to know, just to satisfy her curiosity.

–

IX.

Wedding bells rang (or rather they didn’t, as they were a figment of Jenny’s imagination) as Jenny and Rupert were married, at a nice location in the park. It was a quiet ceremony, at the white pavilion. (They previously joked about holding it in the graveyard, since that was where they ended up spending time together quite often, but obviously they couldn’t hold a wedding in the graveyard, that would be just disrespectful.)

The skies were a bright blue, dotted with wispy white cirrus clouds. A soft breeze stirred in the air, through Jenny’s veil and making it dance in soft shapes. Rupert looked happier than he had in a very long time. Even though he’d made the choice to leave Buffy and abscond to England, he didn’t remain there for long and Jenny was eager to have him back, albeit a bit annoyed with him. On the day Rupert returned to Sunnydale and the world didn’t end, they made a promise to each other to work out their differences, and that’s when he brought up marriage. They’d been engaged since the spring of ‘01, but due to traumatic events surrounding that year they decided to put it off for a while.

Finally, that moment had came to pass.

With the exchanging of vows, the couple kissed and the ceremony was complete. Standing before the small assembly, Jenny scanned across the faces of every single person that was present.

The Scoobies, every one of them. Over the years she’d become their surrogate mom, especially for Dawn following the deaths of Joyce and Buffy. Dawn hadn’t bothered to hide her tears of joy. She beamed, radiant as a sunflower.

Several members of Rupert’s family turned up, his father and two women who seemed to be his nieces, perhaps? While they hardly showed it on their faces, Jenny could read a sense of internal pride.

Angel stood under a maroon umbrella, with Wesley and two other people she didn’t recognise. After departing from LA, the Scoobies continued to collaborate with Angel Investigations on an occasional basis, usually maintaining a connection over the phone. The group of investigators looked considerably more worn out to Jenny as compared to the last time she’d seen them, which was nearly three years ago. Cordelia was not present, which surprised Jenny, as the Cordelia she knew would jump at any chance to be present at a social gathering.

Jenny and Rupert led the first dance, and it was the dance of their lives. If they were going to perish in the impending battle against the First Evil, they were going to live their lives to the fullest before heading off to the fight.

And live their lives to the fullest they did.

–

X.

The battle was over, and all that was left of Sunnydale was a smoking crater in the ground.

“Well, there goes Sunnydale,” remarked Jenny in a rather unremarkable way. She slipped her hand through Rupert’s, and they held on as they stood at the edge of the cliff, which seemed to lead down to nothing.

“There’s another Hellmouth in Cleveland, apparently.” Rupert said. “Oh, we don’t have to go running there immediately. We’ve got an army of Slayers now, there’s no need for us to be involved in everything.”

“We need a holiday.” Jenny suggested.

“I would completely agree with you on this. Where to?”

Jenny side-glanced at him. “You’re asking me?”

“We never got a honeymoon, since we were so wrapped up with work.” Rupert lamented, giving a small sigh.

“Home.”

“And where would that be?”

“You could take me back to your home in England. Willow says you’ve got a house with a pasture.” Jenny said. “Not to be totally intruding, of course.”

“We could make a home there. Finally settle down, base ourselves in England.”

Jenny shrugged. “Now that sounds like a plan.”

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