Can’t Or Won’t
Words are powerful. Words are dangerous. Words shape the mind. Think about what you read, what you’ve heard. “My mother told me this”. “My father told me that”. Think about books and their pages and pages of words. Think about the obsession that we have with written word, legal documentation, contracts, “Did you get it in writing?” “I hate you.” “He said he loved me.” Action is the purest form of reality. Words often distract us from action. There are two half assed contractions in the English language that are often used in place of each other. Can’t and Won’t. These two half assed representations of two words are often used in situations of half assed behavior. In almost every instance can’t should be replaced with won’t. “I can’t quit smoking.” No, the reality of the situation is that you won’t quit smoking. When you say “I can’t quit smoking” what I hear is “I am too lazy to try to quit smoking, I do not care about my future if it means I have to sacrifice my comfort.” I have no sympathy for you. “I can’t be without him/her.” What I hear is “I am too afraid to be alone, I will not stand on my own two feet I’d rather be in this unhealthy situation, and I do not deserve happiness”. I can’t work out, I can’t run. What I hear is “I will not work out, because it is hard, I like to be comfortable, everything is nice and safe here, I do not believe in challenging myself, I am lazy and I’m ok with that, I do not believe in making my life harder to make myself better that makes no sense to me” It’s funny to listen to those people who say they are ok with being physically lazy or physically unfit. Lazy is not cute. Lazy will never be cute. The only people who cannot quit smoking are people who have already died from it. You can be without an unhealthy relationship, because you existed before it. If you have muscle tissue you can work out. These are the realities. The biggest problem with the word can’t is that it eliminates possibility, you owe yourself possibility, you owe yourself chance. So why do people say can’t? Subconsciously people don’t want to come to terms with the fact that the only thing holding them back from a better existence is themselves. Or as I find myself saying more often, “people don’t want to accept the reality of their situation”.
