Sep 1, 2019
She had ten thoughts before she said a word, and ten more after she’d said it; he could see them in her eyebrows and the way she bit her lip.
Cara Wall, The Dearly Beloved: A Novel (Simon & Schuster, August 13, 2019)
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She had ten thoughts before she said a word, and ten more after she’d said it; he could see them in her eyebrows and the way she bit her lip.
Cara Wall, The Dearly Beloved: A Novel (Simon & Schuster, August 13, 2019)
I’m impatient. I can’t let anything be.
Cara Wall, The Dearly Beloved: A Novel (Simon & Schuster, August 13, 2019)
as if the books were breathing, alive as big dogs sleeping at the foot of his bed
Charles sat in the library reading... He loved the library, its mahogany shelves that climbed to the ceiling, its bounty of lush pages majestically restrained. He loved it especially on days like this, when it was empty, steeped in quiet, electric with promise, as if the books were breathing, alive as big dogs sleeping at the foot of his bed. He reveled in that particular stillness, in which he felt as if he could, at any minute, turn a page and recognize everything there was in the world to know.
~ Cara Wall, The Dearly Beloved: A Novel (Simon & Schuster, August 13, 2019)
I’m going to ask you to ‘feel’ it
“Study does not engender wisdom,” he continued, his voice stern and challenging. “Analysis does not inspire insight.” He raised his eyebrows, exhorting Charles and his classmates to pay attention. “Only empathy allows us to see clearly. Only compassion brings lasting change.” Tom strode to his desk, hoisted himself up to sit on one corner. “I am going to ask you to imagine yourself into the history we read. I am going to ask you to feel it. Because only living it will convince you to stop it from happening again.”
~ Cara Wall, The Dearly Beloved: A Novel (Simon & Schuster, August 13, 2019)
You’re going to ask if you can marry my daughter?
“You’re going to ask if you can marry my daughter,” Nan’s father said.
“Yes,” James answered.
“Why?”
James thought: Because she is jolly and pretty and bright, like a firefly, blinking in and out of hedges and trees. Because I imagine her in the kitchen, washing dishes, looking out the window and humming to herself, her brow knit in concentration. I imagine myself coming up behind her, putting my arms around her, resting my chin on her shoulder. I imagine her face turning up to me, bright and pale and astonishing, and I imagine her lips just before I kiss her, full and parted, almost singing the words of a song. Because I think beyond kissing her, because I think about her naked and warm under clean sheets and damp from the bath. I imagine her bare ankle rubbing against my own. I imagine her hair disheveled; I imagine myself smoothing it out of her eyes. I imagine making toast with her and eating it at a round table. When I do, I am just as crazed with passion for her as I would be in bed. There is no difference between imagining her naked and imagining her with a kerchief over her hair.
“Because I love her,” he said.
~ Cara Wall, The Dearly Beloved: A Novel (Simon & Schuster, August 13, 2019)
that restlessness was my calling
“Restlessness was my calling. I was ashamed of that for a long time... But I understand it now. I understand the feeling that something is not quite right—the feeling that something should be done, changed, fixed—that feeling... is never wrong. It isn’t something to bury or ignore."
~ Cara Wall, The Dearly Beloved: A Novel (Simon & Schuster, August 13, 2019)
My call isn’t one of proof. It’s one of possibility.
Cara Wall, The Dearly Beloved: A Novel (Simon & Schuster, August 13, 2019)
He wanted to know how she moved in the world, so that he could recognize her in a crowd just from the way she tucked her hair behind her ear.
For three weeks, Charles tried to forget Lily. He attended class, ate in the dining hall, wrote papers, and went to church on Sundays. He read the newspaper, shined his shoes, took his blazers in to be pressed, all while trying to forget Lily’s brown hair and slight frame. It did not work. He wanted to know her. He wanted to put depth and shadow and texture to her outline. He wanted to discover the timbre of her voice, to watch her hands move as she talked, to know her stride, her pace, to hear her snap at him in annoyance, to feel her hand on his arm as she made him pause to look at something that had caught her eye. He wanted to know how she sat, how she held her cup, how she brushed her hair. He was surprised by how much he wanted to see her room, to know what color it was painted, what light it got, whether her desk was wide or narrow. He wanted to know how she moved in the world, so that he could recognize her in a crowd just from the way she tucked her hair behind her ear.
~ Cara Wall, The Dearly Beloved: A Novel (Simon & Schuster, August 13, 2019)