You
I see you.
The way you keep your gaze down as you walk,
The way you avoid any eye contact,
The way you try to look like nothing; not lonely or sad or happy or different — literally nothing.
I notice you watch the "cool" girls,
And try to figure out how they work, how they manage to always be first.
And why do you always come last?
In a crowded room of people, there is not enough oxygen for everyone to inhale
So you take shallow breaths and push yourself against the wall.
You try to make yourself as small and insignificant as you can
Because God forbid you become an inconvenience.
You've given yourself to so many other people you've forgotten you need yourself.
And that induces a different ache,
One I am familiar with
Because I did that too.
They told me, "breathe easy!"
I said, "I try to!"
Do not let yourself suffocate,
As I did myself for so long.
Pause and drink in the air
Because you can.
Stand up straight and tall
Because you actually matter.
My darling, you're not a "cool" girl.
You are something else entirely.
© D. Casipit