@casper-the-friendly-being has tagged me to list 3 fictional characters that I feel resemble me the best (or maybe that I identify with the most? Idk, I love all of these characters an immense amount, so it is almost definitely cheating to list them as people that actually “resemble” me in any way). Thank you!! And I’m sorry it’s taken me a while to get around to these.
1) Miranda Hart (she totally counts as a fictional character, SHUSH) Tall and exceedingly clumsy, has zero grace to speak of, always makes a mess of formal occasions. Has to shop in the men's section for comfortable shoes. Is not-so-secretly a giant child at heart, has been known to name and assign personalities/tragic backstories to inanimate objects before using them to act out elaborate tales. Will vehemently deny inanimate object personification even if caught in the act. Has once accidentally forgotten to wear underwear to a doctor's appointment where getting undressed was required. Sometimes sprays self with air freshener if deodorant/perfume isn't an option at that precise moment, to own immense shame. Cannot flirt to save life. Would open up and live off income from joke shop if had any business sense to speak of. Has to viciously beat down the urge to spontaneously sing or start uncontrollably giggling in awkward/entirely inappropriate situations. Would rather gallop or skip everywhere than run. Seriously, if running is compulsory, then those close by must be prepared to suffer the consequences. Needs to remember to hold onto boobs in extreme cases where running is required, lest they break free and run amok. Family Disappointment™.
2) Geraldine, the Vicar of Dibley Plus-size and somewhat impatient, has been known to become stuck in own clothing in the past. Hopeless romantic, even after spending lifetime watching everyone else get their happily ever afters while simultaneously remaining alone. Embarrassing but rather hilarious drunk, unless caught being a sad drunk instead. Would rather be carried 10 feet down the street nestled in the claw of a bulldozer than have to walk anywhere, ever. Will hide food around the house/in clothes/smuggle it in holy books if need be, and comfort eats when shit gets bad. Would willingly submerge self in a chocolate fountain in front of assembled friends and family. Constant therapist and matchmaker for said friends and family, despite having zero shit together. Fucking loves babies. Has strong set of morals and beliefs, will cause a scene if led to believe an injustice is taking place. Sex positive, unabashedly feminist, mad at the patriarchy, 100% ready for a fight whenever, wherever, and can snark with the best of them. Rampant shipper, has emphatically yelled "JUST KISS YOU MORONS" at members of OTP when pushed to breaking point by the strain of their severe sexual tension. Seems to have somehow found self completely surrounded by wonderful lunatics. Pretty pleased with this development, to be perfectly honest. Would kill a man for a chocolate crunchie.
...(resist urge to compare yourself to Castiel, RESIST URGE TO COMPARE YOURSELF TO CASTIEL)
3) Castiel Socially awkward mushroom who constantly feels one step behind in the face of everyone else's wit and general ability to cope with everything. Would trade left leg to be able to just waltz around healing people's hurts, but has the innate, astonishing tendency to fuck up consistently and spectacularly instead, despite best intentions. Experiences bouts of depression, anxiety, and agoraphobia, has irrationally hated doorknobs in the past for exact same reason. Turns into terrifying and hulking badass when pissed... may have slight anger issues. Said anger issues mostly understandable, and honestly kinda handy in a pinch. Is one salty motherfucker when caught in a Mood, with deadpan so dry it can kill, but would much rather stay in watching Netflix and surrounded by soft things than have to deal with the world's bullshit. Generally perpetually run-down and tired. Has tried drinking problems away in the past, gained some relatively depressing stories from those few attempts, ultimately decided not to drink anymore. Again, the typical Family Disappointment™, except to that one wild uncle and favourite cousin who always have their back. Usually prefers the company of the family they've found than the company of the family that doesn't quite get where they're coming from. Talks to animals, smiles at small children, watches the bees, and can be found quietly observing the universe off in the corner somewhere away from scrutiny. Completely indifferent to sexual orientation (*wink*), and maybe kinda a lil bit ace or demi. Possibly. Further research needed.
(godfuckingdamnit, Arianna.)
I tag @thursdays-fallen-angel (you’re not getting out of any of these, sorry marvellous one), @buckandsam, @sammylovessalad, @redweezard, @iwannaliveindeansdimples, @hudine, @onceuponadestiel, @samspuppyface, @myholydelusions, and @deanlikesaholyblowjob, if the mood strikes them.
