It's hard to sleep at night || Secret Headcanon
Her hands were shaking. It was 2am of the second night out of three since she had ran out of pills, it was the second sleepless night. No one noticed that morning. She managed to cover the dark circles around her eyes with a heavy layer of make up, and just like she had learned in life, everything was completely okay just by rocking some red lipstick. Elisa wasn’t sure if she was going to be able to cover everything the next day. Once her hands started shaking due to the lack of medication, everything would go downhill. Her mood would swing from being slightly grumpy, too furious and to completely depressed in a matter of minutes.
Soon the insomnia turned into anxiety, and the anxiety became panic and more tears with the last one. Elise hid in the bathroom and she even though she barely knew anyone, she thought about asking someone for a sleeping pill. She was sure someone must have some, but she wanted to prove herself that the road was closed. That she was getting better, that she was able to sleep and live in peace with herself, and that she wasn't dependent on sleeping pills or any pills of any kind. Elisa wanted to show the show, but mostly herself, that she was free, independent and ready to have a normal life and that was one of the main reasons she had come to the show in first place. But it was harder than she thought. Her heartbeat became faster and faster with each second, and no matter how many times she breathed in deeply, it would just get worse. Elise broke into tears falling to the bathroom floor, hugging his legs against his chest and remained there until the first rays of sunlight hit the wall in front of her. With swollen eyes, Elise went back to bed where she pretended she'd stayed all night just waiting for the first person to show signs of live to start her day.