where Asena spills her thoughts on her ( nonexistent ) childhood in the form of poetry &. slightly incoherent metaphors and purple prose with unnecessary titles, disguised with vague poetic fantasy references.
CONTENTS ;
↯Sections 001 &. 002, Past &. Present.
↯Parts One &. Two in each section, with 4 &. 6 works respectively.
↯Unnecessary song recs
FEATURES ;
quotes like “forgive and forget but no one told me what to do when i was wronged and changed and can never go back” &. “sometimes i wish to be soulless just to be rid of longing for something i don’t want.”
+
titles like [ MY HAND IN THE FLAME BUT YOU’RE THE ONE BURNING ] &. [ WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THE HEART STOPS? ]
EXTRA INFO ;
↯completely free ! &. i won’t be accepting money for various reasons but consider donating to those who need it instead !
↯please consider leaving a reblog ! I would love to get validation
↯should you take the time to read it, maybe leave me a comment or two?
↯to fully appreciate the chapbook, play the recommended song on loop until a new song is suggested and repeat
character: VIXX's N
author: fifi
genre: smut
WARNINGS: rated M
request: “Can i request long scenario with VIXX N? The plot is you and Hakyeon decide to spend new year eve day together but he come late(alr on new year day) cause he have a schedule with VIXX. Can you make it smut?”
"Oh, I'm still mad." you said, though it wasn't true. "You'll just have to work for your forgiveness."
"So should I..." Hakyeon started, leaning forward and rising slowly off the floor, bracing his hands on your thighs as he inched his face closer to yours. "earn it like this?"
~
You had been sitting in the same spot on your couch for hours now, the cycle of looking from your cellphone, to the door, then to the television screen continuing repeatedly. You had been awake and alert when you had first sat down, telling yourself that Hakyeon would be walking through the front door any minute - or at least call.
But hours had passed, the New Year's countdown was starting in less than five minutes, and your eyelids felt heavy from the worry and stress that had been pressing down on you all night. Hakyeon had called you just that morning, promising to be home before the sun set that night - but it was almost the next day, the new year, and there was absolutely no sign of him.
Your body felt exhausted, and you knew that couldn't possibly sit there any longer. You let your body stretch across the length of the couch, allowing your eyes to droop shut just as the announcer on the television began counting down the seconds to midnight.
And you were asleep before the countdown reached one, your last thought before dozing off being about the aching in your heart, caused by the fact that Hakyeon's arms weren't wrapped around you, and that his lips hadn't there to kiss yours at the stroke of midnight.
You weren't awoken by the opening of the front door, nor by the hands lightly shaking you in an attempt to wake you - probably because you didn't exactly want to wake up. You had had hurt and anger boiling inside of you as you slept, and you weren't ready to see Hakyeon's face.
But as his fingers gently pushed your hair out of your eyes, placing a careful kiss at the very center of your forehead, you knew that you couldn't stay angry at him. Fluttering your eyes open, already mostly awake, you met his eyes, which looked tired and worried as they stared desperately into yours.
"I'm sorry." he whispered, his hand lingering on your face. "I'm really sorry."
You sighed, purposefully not uttering a response as your rubbed your eyes and sat up on the couch.
Hakyeon stayed kneeling on the floor, grabbing one of your hands with both of his once you were comfortable.
"Our schedule got crowded up and our manager wouldn't let us touch our phones and - no, I shouldn't be making excuses. But I feel absolutely horrible."
Though you didn't want to give in so easily, your heart accepted his apology and forgave him instantly. He just looked and sounded so worried and sincere...and you had missed him so much the last couple of weeks. How could you possibly stay mad at him?
You closed your eyes, exhaling slowly as if you were trying to stall for a moment. Opening your eyes back up, Hakyeon's expression was even more pitiful as he looked up at your expectantly, waiting eagerly for any kind of response from you.
"It's fine." you said, rubbing your thumb over the smooth skin on the back of his hand. "I guess you'll just have to make it up to me."
Hakyeon's eyebrows raised slightly, already knowing what you were hinting at.
"Really? You're not mad?" he asked, his sad expression already lifted.
"Oh, I'm still mad." you said, though it wasn't true. "You'll have to work for your forgiveness."
Hakyeon swallowed, his eyes wide as he looked at you and tried to make sense of your words. You held back chuckles, loving that you were able to play him like you were.
"So should I..." Hakyeon started, leaning forward and rising slowly off the floor, bracing his hands on your thighs as he inched his face closer to yours. "earn it like this?"
You nodded, a chuckle sputtering out of your lips as the tip of your nose lightly tapped his.
Hakyeon nodded, closing the distance between your mouths as soon as he was sure of what you wanted. Your hands found their way around his waist, resting on the small of his back and pulling him slightly closer to you. He slowly climbed up onto the couch, positioning his legs on either side of you as he straddled your lap.
Finally closer to you, Hakyeon cupped his hands on the sides of your face - and you could’ve sworn you could taste the guilt that was probably still heavy in his chest. You felt bad for making him feel bad about being late - but then again, he had made you feel bad as well, so that should make you even.
Though you had forgiven him moments ago, you still wanted to have some fun and tease him a bit more. Bringing your hands back toward the front of his waist, your fingers dug in between the waist of his jeans and his stomach, unclasping the button and undoing the zipper.
Hakyeon's mouth hesitated slightly against yours, ready to argue but knowing that he shouldn't. He couldn't help but gasp as you reached into his jeans, grabbing him though his boxers.
You smiled against his lips, opening your eyes to see the surprised expression on his face. His eyes begged you not to tease him, but you continued, beginning to massage your fingers against his hardening length and watching as he bit his lip to hold back any sounds that were threatening to escape his mouth.
Moving his face to your neck, he tried to distract himself by nibbling at the skin just above your collarbone, his hands grabbing at the tops of your thighs and squeezing tighter as your hand added more pressure to his lower half.
Finally deciding to let him off the hook for a moment, you tugged at the bottom of his t-shirt until he stopped to help pull it over his head. After pulling off your own t-shirt (which just so happened to be one of his, too), Hakyeon grabbed your shoulders and positioned you so that you were laying down, him climbing on top of you once again.
Instead of going for your face or neck, Hakyeon's fingers went straight for the elastic band of your pajama pants, sliding them down along with your underwear. After slipping those completely off of you, Hakyeon immediately latched himself onto you; his mouth engulfed yours, his left hand grabbing your breast, and his other hand slipping two fingers inside of your exposed lower half.
You gasped against his mouth, your hands wrapping around his body and spreading across his back, your nails digging into his skin harder and harder the more eagerly he continued to pleasure you.
"Hakyeon..." you moaned against his lips, your fingers eventually finding his waist and trying to pull his pants down his thighs, but not quite succeeding because of how distracted you were. "Hakyeon, please."
Hakyeon smiled, both of his hands leaving your body as he worked at pulling his pants down to his knees, then completely off, joining the rest of your clothes on the floor.
Neither of you were patient enough to continue teasing each other, so as soon as you were both completely undressed, Hakyeon wasted no time. With one hand on your waist and the other wrapped around his length, he slowly pushed inside of you, both of you simultaneously letting moans of utter pleasure escape your lips.
Though Hakyeon was quickening his pace with every thrust, you couldn't help but push your lower half against him eagerly, your hands on his waist so they he wouldn't stop.
Becoming exhausted, Hakyeon rested his head on your shoulder, pressing kisses to your skin as he continued to thrust in and out of you. You ran your hands through his hair, down his back, scraping your nails against his skin and hoping that the marks would be deep enough for you to trace your fingers over later.
It didn't take long at all for you to both reach your climax, breathing heavily and screaming in ecstasy before collapsing onto each other with content exhaustion.
Hakyeon tangled your legs together, wrapping his arms around you and letting you cuddle up against his chest.
"I know that it's hard to forgive what I did tonight," he said quietly, running his fingers soothingly through your hair. "but I hope that I can make it up to you."
"You already did, Hakyeon." you assured him, pressing a soft kiss to his chest. "I'm just happy that you're here, now."
"I'm happy to be here, with you." he said, exhaling with relief. "Happy New Year, my love."
character: VIXX's N
author: fifi
genre: fluff
request: “Can I please request a holiday themed scenario where you are snowed in with a stranger (N). Little angst, little fluff and smut to kick of the holiday season?”
notes: I apologize if this isn't exactly what you wanted - it was difficult to incorporate angst and smut into this with them only being strangers, and I tried to put in as much fluff as possible. I really hope you enjoy it, nonetheless!!
“Don’t go,” Hakyeon said quickly, suddenly being close enough to clutch his fingers around your arm, stopping you from going any further out the door. “It’s too dangerous. I’d feel horrible if something happened to you after you left.”
~
“Ah, it’s gotten pretty dark outside, I should probably get going…”
You sat up on the floor, closing the multiple textbooks that were laying in front of you and starting to collect them into a pile.
Hakyeon simply nodded from where he was sitting across from you, picking his own things up off the floor.
“Do you think we got pretty much everything done? Or do you think we’ll need to meet up again before Monday?” you asked casually, somewhat struggling to shove your books into your bag.
“We’re pretty close to being finished, but I’ll work on the last couple things and have it finished for class.” Hakyeon assured you, setting his books on the coffee table beside him before standing up as you did.
You nodded, a moment of awkward silence engulfing you both as you tried to figure out what you were supposed to say next. Instead of replying, you turned and headed toward the door, Hakyeon taking a seat on his couch and grabbing for the remote as if you were already gone.
The noise of the television barely caught your ear as you finished pulling on your jacket - something about severe weather conditions. But you shrugged it off, forgetting about it entirely. That is, until you opened the front door.
The cold hit you instantly, causing you to scrunch up your face and wrap your arms as tight as you could around your body.
“How did it get so cold in the last few hours…” you mumbled to yourself, pulling the strap of your backpack farther up your shoulder and taking a step out the door.
“Wait.” Hakyeon’s voice rang from behind you, hesitant but abrupt. You turned around to find that he had gotten up and taken a few steps in your direction, remote in hand.
“What is it?” you asked over your shoulder.
“The weather.” he said simply, waving the remote toward the television that was nearly out of your view.
“What about it?” you asked, taking a step back in his house so you could get a decent view of the screen.
“It looks really bad. The roads, that is. And...I know you live far away.” he said quietly, possibly regretting having spoken up about it when you obviously weren’t concerned.
You shrugged. “Don’t worry about it. I’m sure there are a few taxis still driving around-”
“That’s not safe.” Hakyeon interrupted, shaking his head. “The roads are too dangerous. You should stay here until they get better.”
“I have places to be, Hakyeon. Things to do. I can’t possibly stay here all night.” you shook your head, turning back toward the door. Though your gut told you not to leave, that something bad was bound to happen, you weren’t going to stay at Hakyeon’s house. He was practically a stranger - it had been odd to have been there in the first place, even if it was for a school project. You couldn’t get snowed in there, for who knows how long.
“Don’t go,” Hakyeon said quickly, suddenly being close enough to clutch his fingers around your arm, stopping you from going any further out the door. “It’s too dangerous, [Y/N]. I’d feel horrible if something happened to you after you left.”
You sighed, turning to face him. “Are you really not going to let me leave?”
Hakyeon shook his head, letting go of your arm.
“Fine.” you rolled your eyes, stepping back into the house and shutting the door behind you. “Just until the roads clear up, okay?”
Hakyeon nodded, his face suddenly relieved. “It shouldn’t take too long.” he assured you, heading back toward the couch.
After removing your jacket and dropping your backpack back onto the floor, you relaxed in the chair across the room from him.
Though you could’ve easily focused in on the television, you couldn’t help but let your thoughts roam, making you feel more and more anxious as the seconds passed. You knew that you had homework at home that you needed to finish, an essay to write, finals to study for. You hadn’t eaten all day - and you weren’t about to ask Hakyeon for some food. And not only was being snowed in here just wasting time you needed to spend doing more important things; you knew that you’d probably have to stay the night here, and that made you more nervous than anything.
After a while, Hakyeon silently stood up and exited the room, the noises from across the small house indicated that he was in the kitchen. You clutched your stomach as you felt it growl and beg for food, but you weren’t about to ask him to cook you something. It was enough that he had to deal with you being in his house all night; you shouldn’t bother him any more than you had to.
You had nearly forgotten about the fact that Hakyeon wasn’t in the room until he stepped back in, suddenly blocking your view of the television screen with a steaming hot bowl. Your mouth instantly watered at the sight, and you looked up at Hakyeon with wide, questioning eyes.
“I doubt you’ve eaten dinner, since you’ve been here since lunch time.” he said, wiggling his arm slightly as a signal for you to take the bowl.
You wrapped your fingers around the bowl, taking it carefully from his hands and hovering it over your lap.
“Thank you…” you said quietly, avoiding his eyes as he sat back down on the couch, nodding in response.
You ate the ramen he had prepared more eagerly than you probably should have, what with a boy being in the same room with you. But you were practically starving, and he didn’t really seem to mind.
After a while, when both of your eyelids began to feel heavy and you couldn’t really focus your gaze on the television anymore, Hakyeon exited the room for the second time that night, this time not quite indicating what for.
He returned not shortly after, a pile of blankets and pillows in his arms. He dropped them onto the couch that he had been sitting on, beginning to smooth them out and set them up.
“You don’t have to-” you started, sitting up in the recliner.
Hakyeon waved you away, shaking his head. “It’s fine. Just sit back down.”
You pursed your lips, sitting back in the chair hesitantly, watching him as he finished making your bed for you.
“I’m going to go ahead and get to bed.” Hakyeon said, turning to you. “You’re welcome to get anything from the kitchen, and use the bathroom whenever you need. If you need anything other than that, then just feel free to knock on my bedroom door. Okay?”
You nodded, watching him smile and exit the room quickly, waiting to hear his bedroom door shut before jumping off the recliner and climbing under the warm blankets that he had laid onto the couch.
It didn’t take you long to fall asleep - but then, it didn’t take long for you to wake back up. You were stirred to consciousness by your own shivering, realizing when you came to your senses that the temperature had dropped a significant amount since you had first shut your eyes.
You tried to ignore it, wrapping the blankets around you as tightly as you possibly could to try to keep in the warmth, but with no luck. You were so cold that you could barely feel your fingers, and your teeth were chattering from how hard you were shivering.
Hakyeon couldn’t have possibly turned off the heat - he wouldn’t have chosen to be this cold himself. Had the heat stopped working?
You thought about it for a few moments, ultimately realizing that you had no choice but to inform him of the situation. Climbing off the couch and wrapping one of the blankets around you, you tiptoed down the hallway and to his bedroom door, knocking your knuckles against the wood softly.
You heard a groaning noise come from the other side of the door, Hakyeon had probably just been stirred from his sleep. You knocked again, listening as Hakyeon cleared his throat before telling you to come in.
You pushed the door open just as Hakyeon was reaching over to his bedside table to turn on the light. You could’ve sworn that your heart nearly skipped a beat at the sight of his half-asleep state - his disheveled, messy hair, his squinty eyes and puffy cheeks. But you shook it off, pushing the ridiculous thoughts to the back of your mind and composing yourself before speaking.
“I, um...I think the heater’s broken.” you said quietly, tightening the blanket around your shoulders.
“Oh?” Hakyeon sat up more in his bed, rubbing his eyes. “I thought so, too, but I wasn’t really sure.” he paused to yawn before continuing. “I don’t think I have any other blankets, or a space heater of any sort…I’m not sure how we could keep warm.”
You opened your mouth to suggest something, but realized that it was outrageous and quickly snapped your mouth shut. But Hakyeon seemed to have noticed, for he perked up, his eyes wide.
“Do you have an idea?”
You shook your head instantly, cursing yourself for having expressed the fact that something had come to mind, hoping that he would just let it go. But, of course, he didn’t.
“No, if you have any ideas, please share them. Because I have none, and I feel terrible that this is happening.”
You heart pounded in your ears, knowing that you weren’t getting off the hook, and that you’d just have to voice your suggestion, as embarrassing as it might be. “It’s really just stupid and actually quite ridiculous…” you glanced up at Hakyeon, who was patiently waiting for you to get to the point. “Y’know, like...body heat?”
Hakyeon understood what you were thinking instantly, without you having to explain any further - which you weren’t sure if you were grateful for or not.
“Well, there’s really nothing more that we can do, unless we want to just freeze in separate rooms.” Hakyeon said, shrugging slightly.
You nodded in agreement, your stomach suddenly tying in knots at just the thought of what was about to follow.
“I guess, just...climb in.” Hakyeon said, patting the vacant side of the bed next to him before beginning to lay back down.
You nodded again, swallowing hard as you made your way across the room, being slow and hesitant as you released the blanket from your shoulders and climbed under the covers that were neatly laid over Hakyeon’s bed.
As the light was turned out, and the only sound in the room was of both of your light and slow breaths, you couldn’t help but let your mind roam around the thought of the man that you were sharing a bed with. It was easy to say that you had had feelings for him all along - of course, those feelings being merely simple and childish, but still lingering.
And you soon discovered that the feelings had to have been mutual as Hakyeon’s arm carefully slipped around your waist, his body pressing to yours ever-so-lightly as he whispered something about distributing body heat, making your heart flutter and knowing that there was no way you were getting any sleep that night.
