Chandra75 again; I feel the need to explain myself a little further, so that perhaps people might understand why I was so against the Caryl ship.
A part of my mental illness is something called maladaptive daydreaming. I live in my head, I develop real lives in real situations that will never ever happen obviously but I live and pretend as though they are real. obviously, one of my daydreams was being a part of the show but in my head the show was real and if they coupled up it meant my maladaptive daydreaming couldn’t be real. I know it sounds crazy, hell, I am crazy. But that’s why I was so against it.
My doctors say that there’s nothing dangerous about the maladaptive daydreaming as long as I know that it only exists in my head and that it cannot ever live or exist in real life. It’s a boundary I’ve spent a long time setting up for my Self and I’m much better now. I literally just keep to journaling my day dreams  but it is a comfort to me and sometimes gets me through my severe anxiety attacks.
Full exposure confession; I think Carol and Daryl could be a couple. I do see what you guys see and I always saw it but I never wanted to admit it because I got so into all the nastiness and hatred and then when someone altered a picture of my dead dog and tried to get me fired from my job and all this other stuff, I just went all in on the crazy. I was so happy for this ship when they announced the spinoff show but another confession, I haven’t watched the show since Rick left. 
So anyway, that was the big motivator behind my being so horrible to all of you Caryl shippers. This isn’t an excuse but another adage to it is that I’ve been bullied my entire life and even though the bullying I experienced here was completely reactionary to the shit I was doing, I still felt put back into that place I was at in junior high. I’ve worked through that as well. I’m so sorry to all of you.
@ikkleosu @thereadersmuse yours are the only two blogs I specifically remember by name as being absolutely awful to but I know there are others. I’m so sorry for everything.
Don’t worry, I won’t bother you guys or be in this tag again, I just need to purge my soul and I’m going on a sojourn in four days to do just that, I’m doing a reset of myself
