#changinglocations

[wcs53]

Moving boxes again! 📦 📦 #packingup #changinglocations #quickmove https://www.instagram.com/p/CmOx5IbrK-k/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[inhaleyogaruth]

1/12 Friday 6:00am - Wake Up 9:30am - Gentle Vinyasa 11:00am - Gentle Vinyasa 2:00pm - Senior Chair Yin 3:30pm - Yin Namaste #movingsoon #inhaleyogallc #inhaleyogaruth #ruthanndunkerly #changinglocations #changinglives #tryyoga (at Inhale Yoga)

[strongislandsown]

#ChangingLocations #BowHunting #DeerSeason #ArcherySeason #LifeOfAnArcher #MobileMadness

[valakodish]

When Is It Time to Say Enough?

When is it time to say enough of the urban life? A life rife with traffic, exorbitant expenses, constant lurking danger, and dog eat dog mentality?   When is it time to say enough of being surrounded by lack of integrity and profit over welfare of others?  Does one’s tolerance level go in cycles like the moon? Or is crazy  cyclical, not one’s tolerance? 

As I mentioned in a previous post, urban life is full of richness of the arts, diversity, and excitement. It’s an addiction that is hard to walk away from, so when does one actually know when it’s time to make the decision and take the leap? 

I have lived in Miami longer than I have lived in any single place my entire life. Having grown up as a military brat, as well as spending 19 years of my adult life flying for an airline, trust me, 23 years in one place is a long ass time for me. With that you would think that my roots go far too deep to just pick up and move. In a short answer, not really. Sure I have a handful of good friends that I would miss terribly, as well as missing the proximity of some of my family members living two counties north of here, but how often do we actually have quality time together? Busy lives, struggling to stay above the urban fray, managing their own interpersonal relationships…all make gatherings between friends and family not quite as often as you would think. In the end, one has to think about the quality of life they are living in any given moment. Are you happy to be where you are when you wake up? Are you living your life as full as you possibly can? Are you living authentically? Are you finding little successes in your progress to fulfillment? These are all things I weigh on a daily basis. Maybe I’m putting too much emphasis on all the various aspects, but I can’t help but feel I’m in living in a pressure cooker and that I have been well cooked for quite a while. I have stayed this long, to see my youngest get accepted and ship off to college. I am just two months short of that after 22 years of motherhood. My hope was that this beautiful work/live space would provide me inspiration and the ability to create and produce while spending these last months with her. It has provided some of that in my very short time here, but it has also produced as much anxiety and concern as it has creativity. This area is just on the brink of speculators buying up block after block as it is one of the last frontiers in Miami, east of I-95, and it happens to be bordered on all sides by gentrification. That being said, it is far from gentrification, and when gentrification closes in on the have-nots, the have-nots literally have no where to go. I knew it would be a challenge living in the midst of it, but I have yet to shy away from diversity, in many of the cities I have lived - most while they were transforming into gentrified meccas. However, I really had no idea that each and every single day, now day 42, would bring a new challenge from termite infestation, to the roof leaks, to gang shoot outs, to today, the latest being a discovery of a decomposing homeless body on the tracks close enough to smell. Needless to say, I fear more for my daughter’s well being than my own. The whole point of remaining here just one more year was to share this time with her. Is it time to say “UNCLE!” and make the change?

I was thinking about multitudes of times that I made big changes in my life and how the decisions came about. Like this decision, it seems all of them were percolating in the corners of my mind of ill content and then out of the blue, one day, the bell would ring and that would be it. Once I made the decision, all my inertia flowed in that direction, never second guessing myself, including leaving home at 17; heading out west in my beater car at 19; traveling solo through Europe at 25; my first (albeit, very short) marriage to a musician; my second marriage; leaving that marriage after 20 years; so this decision should be like all the rest, right?  Not so fast. This decision doesn’t just affect me alone. My three children were born and raised in Miami, and though none of them are currently living here, Miami will always be their home. It is where the bulk of their family is; it is where all their friends are; it is the place of their childhood memories. If I leave, they will have to make a choice during holidays, as well as other life’s milestones, to visit “home”,  where their father, family and friends will be, or visit their mother in some other place that is not home. I know if I were in their shoes, I would choose to go home. Ultimately, leaving Miami means I will be seeing my children even less than I do now, unless to go to them and take up precious time in their busy, full lives. Tough decision. That brings me to choosing a where to go?  The criteria carries a heavier load than it did 23 years ago. In consideration is where my kids would happily visit me. An accessible place, as well as a fun destination so that visiting mom will be a haven or a vacation perhaps. Having recently started over at the end of a marriage and career, finding a place where I am able to make a smooth transition with work is necessary, for obvious reasons beyond creativity.  And due to the fact that I am an artist, a place that allows me the inspiration of urban life, without such harshness of the inner city life would be nice as well. Of course this imaginary place would still have a middle class that would allow me a better lifestyle than what Miami has to offer on a shoe string budget. And finally, within a state that “does it right.”  That allows dignity from voting rights to putting funding into education, veterans, elderly and more. I have just described my Utopia!  

I have discovered over and over again, that when I manifest, I get what I want. My only mistakes in the past have been not to be specific enough! Be careful of what you ask for. Be specific. I am in search of my Utopia, first stop Denver, but my eyes and mind and gut instinct are open to any and all possibilities and suggestions. 

The bell is ringing, or more like the alarm is sounding, it is time to go. Where O where will this next journey take me?