usual ask after an update: is there any deleted scene we could have? pretty please? 🥺👉👈
so we’ve kinda been m.i.a for the last month so sorry for answering this late. so we don’t have a lot of deleted scenes left (because god we wrote a lot of bad stuff during chapter 24 and got rid of the evidence). but we have this little little scene, taking place when Hermione comes home after the night out.
--
“I gave you all yet you keep asking for more,” she stated.
“You do not know what you are saying,” Tom was now whispering.
“You won,” she mirthlessly laughed. “You were right. Rule n°5-”
“Stop Grace,” he urged her.
“Rule n°5, you always win.”
Hermione was looking right into his eyes and knew, deep inside of her, that at this precise moment he had never wished more for defeat.
--
If you remember, the rule thing is a reference to chapter 13 during the scene in the COS after Warren’s murder.
Mai looked through the window and let a heavy sigh escape her lips. The misty rain falling outside was enveloping the garden in a gloomy mantel of humidity and the grey skies were casting a bleak light on this already morose scenery. Nothing seemed to be left from the bright and sunny weather that was her life just a day before, and the rivulets of rain cascading on the window were slowly washing away all traces of happiness.
A slight knock on the door jolted Mai out of her pensive contemplation. The young woman had been engrossed in her thoughts for a while and the unexpected sound came as a sobering reminder that, despite the apparent calm in the house, she was still in a difficult position.
Since Takigawa's proposal the day before Mai had prudently stayed in her room, trying to avoid the commotion she had caused. She knew it was a cowardly reaction, but since she had no idea how to deal with lady Hara's anger, her cousin's disappointment or the gossip which would most likely spread like a wildfire in the neighbourhood, hiding had seemed to be the most reasonable option.
"Come in" she answered automatically before biting her lip in worry. What if it was lady Hara? No, she reasoned, the old lady would have probably burst through the door without any warning. This soft manner of knocking could only belong to the elegant Masako.
Soon enough the delicate figure of her sister appeared in the doorframe, and Mai let a relieved exhale escape her lips. Masako at least was on her side and wasn't blaming her for her decision.
"Masako, what a nice surprise!" exclaimed Mai while standing up from her armchair to greet her sister. "I was afraid mother would never not let you out of her clutches."
The pleasantry was met with a contrived smile.
"She went downstairs to have a word with father, so I took the opportunity to come and see you."
"I am so happy to have the pleasure of your company, I missed speaking with you! Well, I missed speaking at all to be honest, I haven't seen a kind living soul since yesterday. Pray tell, how are mother's nerves? Still too weak to be deprived of your presence?"
Mai, in her delight to be able to chat with her friend, missed the unusual stiff composure of Masako who was closing the door cautiously.
"Well," replied Masako hesitantly, "you know as well as I do that her nerves are made of steel, even if she claims otherwise. However, I have hardly seen her in such hysterics. No need to tell you mother is most unhappy about the recent turn of events…"
"That I am perfectly aware of," interrupted Mai tiredly. "She had not lost an occasion to voice her thoughts very clearly and loudly each time she knew I was within earshot."
Mai had always known that Lady Hara wasn't especially fond of her, but the friendship provided by Masako and the care for her well-being displayed by Lord Hara had been enough to forget the old lady's hostility so far. However, her decision not to accept a suitor, thus dismissing her chance to leave the house and marry wealth, had sent the old matron in an unprecedented bout of uncontrollable rage.
Masako sighed knowingly, having been the witness of the numerous reproaches her mother had addressed to her sister.
"In all honesty, I feel also responsible for this situation," confessed the dark-haired girl. "I advised you to follow your heart on the matter, and as a result…"
"And as a result I only reap what I saw," said Mai resolutely. "Oh Masako, you are certainly not responsible neither for my folly nor my stubbornness. Had I not been so short-sighted, or had I simply asked for your advice… I could have avoided all this chaos," she finished, her voice tinted with regret.
The orphan was perfectly conscious that her lack of discernment was solely responsible for the misunderstanding. She had led the clergyman to believe she would accept his affections happily, and his magnanimity concerning her foolish naiveté was making the gnawing guilt even more unbearable. Never had she wanted to deceive or hurt him, but whatever how bitterly she was now regretting her stupidity, the wrong had been done. Takigawa had declared he would forever remain her faithful cousin, but she couldn't shake the feeling that she had lost him somehow. The rejection had been hard on her already, the last thing she wanted at the moment was her foster sister feeling guilty about it.
"I beg of you, do not believe you have an ounce of culpability. It was unfortunately all my doing."
"Still," insisted Masako, "I am afraid I have been ill-advised in my comment. I underestimated mother's wrath and now… Mai, I need to warn you, she is determined to coerce you into accepting your cousin's proposal."
The seriousness and regret in her sister's tone got Mai's attention.
"To coerce me?" asked the orphan in alarm. "But how? Masako, if you know about it, please tell me, what exactly is she is planning to do?"
The young lady of the house wrung her hands nervously and sent an apologetic look to her sister.
"She believes that it is her duty to make you admit you were in the wrong, so she went as far as to seek father's support."
"Lord Hara? But what…" started Mai.
"I heard her ask him to force you to go back on your decision, with the very serious threat of banishing you from the house if you don't," finally admitted Masako after a sharp inhale.
Mai's pale complexion turned a whiter shade at these words. So, in addition to hurting a precious family member, her rejection had also triggered a storm that threatened to wreak her life havoc! She had always felt the uncertainty of her position in the Hara family, but since the tragic death of her parents it had been the first time she had realized how insecure her future was thanks to it.
Masako noticed her sister's reaction and went to her side immediately, taking Mai's slightly shaking hands in her own.
"Do not worry," she soothed in her most encouraging tone, "for I am certain father would never allow such a thing. Nor would I," she muttered under her breath. "However," she stated out loud this time, "I thought it would be best to let you know how determined mother is. It would be wise not to anger her further if you can avoid it."
Mai nodded wordlessly, her throat painfully tight and her mind reeling. She had done what her mind and conscience had deemed right, but the terrible outcome was making her reconsider the wiseness of her decision. Why hadn't she accepted her cousin like her reason had told her to? Why had she listened to the stupid organ called a heart, which had demonstrated the annoying habit to be lured by a lying gentleman named Naru? It had only led to more heartache and trouble than it was worth in the end.
Masako squeezed Mai's hands in a silent display of sympathy. As she opened her mouth, probably to offer some comforting words, a hesitant knock at the door signaled the presence of the housemaid. The young lady sighed, released Mai's hands and faced the door resolutely.
"Yes, what is it Jenkins?" she enquired to spare her distraught friend the bother of speaking.
The timid servant opened the door carefully and came in, seemingly embarrassed.
"I am sorry to intrude, but the master and the mistress are asking for miss Mai in the master's office. Hum, she is expected to come at once," added the girl hesitantly, visibly unsure of the degree of seriousness of the request.
"Thank you Jenkins," replied Masako in her usual calm demeanor. "Mai is coming down immediately. You are dismissed."
The maid bowed and left the room after sparing a pitying and somewhat admirative glance to the very pale and discomposed orphan who was standing still beside Masako. Being at the end of Lady Hara's wrath was probably the most frightening thing in the whole world for the servant, and Jenkins didn't envy Mai's situation in the least, but she couldn't help but being impressed before the girl's daring. The young mistress had unknowingly gained her respect.
Once the heavy footsteps of the servant couldn't be heard anymore a crying Mai collapsed on her bed and hid her head in her hands, offering the very image of affliction.
"Oh Masako, what have I gotten myself into? What if they carry out their threats of throwing me out on the streets? What will become of me?"
"Mai, please, do not let yourself fall into despair!" scolded her friend gently. "No such thing will happen, I am certain father would not resort to such means. He most probably simply wants to know your motives, nothing more. Do not fear, I shall accompany you downstairs, I will be by your side."
Mai wiped her misty eyes and nodded, to which Masako responded with an encouraging smile in an obvious attempt at being reassuring. Her schooled serene features could have been convincing enough if she had been able to conceal the anxious glimmer in her eyes.
So it was on unsteady legs and with a frantic heart that Mai went down the stairs to enter the room in which her fate was to be sealed.
She knocked warily on the office's doors and waited for her father to call her in, sparing anguished glances at Masako who was trying to look as encouraging as possible. When the baritone voice of Lord Hara invited her inside Mai took a deep steadying breath and entered the room.
When she passed the doors of the office she was met with the contorted angry face of Lady Hara, standing behind her seated husband, and an unusually solemn-looking Lord Hara. The sight rightfully frightened to the poor orphan, having her praying fervently that she wasn't about to be thrown out of the house without any warning.
"Mai," started Lord Hara in a serious but not unkind voice, "I assume that you understand why we want to speak with you."
Mai nodded wordlessly, her hand clutching her dress desperately. When he had proposed Takigawa had mentioned her foster father was aware of his intent, so she supposed her tutor had well known and welcomed her cousin's proposition.
"I have been informed that you did reject your cousin's proposal yesterday. You may understand that such news came as a surprise to say the least. The whole family was expecting a joyous conclusion after the proposal, since such a union could only benefit you greatly, be it on the social or financial front. I had the occasion to discuss the matter previously with the gentleman and his wealth, situation and intentions toward you were honorable enough to have me give my blessings."
"Indeed!" cried Lady Hara, "Rejecting such a fine gentleman, have you no common sense, you stupid child?"
"Please, dear, let me handle this matter," warned Lord Hara.
"You were incredibly lucky to have such a man show an interest in you, however you ruined your chances with him!" continued the old woman, ignoring her husband's demand. "And your disgraceful behaviour will probably affect our Masako, too! What will people think and say after your blatant flirting? Such ungratefulness, after all that we have done for you! We should throw you out on the streets and make you realise…"
"Enough!" boomed the gentleman in a rare display of authority. "As the head of this family I do believe it is my duty to address this matter!"
Lady Hara gasped indignantly, startled by the outburst, but didn't retort and kept wisely quiet. Mai, though grateful her mother's accusations and threats had stopped, felt quite shaken herself by her father's shout. Her eyes were stinging suspiciously, and it took her a great effort not to burst into hot tears thinking about the terrible outcome which had been evoked .
"So, Mai," resumed the older man more gently, "as I was saying I was pleased to see you show a genuine interest in your cousin during his stay. Having Takigawa as a husband would have guaranteed you a comfortable life, and we would have been glad and relieved to see you settled this well. Do not misunderstand my dear child, this question is only motivated by my concern for your future, since you have no personal fortune to live on would you decide not to marry."
Saying that she had been wrong and that she would accept her cousin right away had never been so tempting to Mai than in that particular moment. She had to gather all her willpower not to falter under lady Hara's furious glares and her foster father's enquiring looks. Thankfully her husband's injunctions to keep quiet had managed to shush the disagreeable lady long enough, and Mai took the opportunity to plead her case.
"I can assure you sir, that I am perfectly aware of all the benefits of marrying my cousin," she declared in a trembling voice. "I do know that he is a respectable gentleman, and I am very fond of him, as an esteemed member of the society, as a caring family member and as a charming friend."
"What stopped you then?" asked Lord Hara, confused.
The young lady clutched her dress tighter and took a deep breath. She knew she had to explain her motives, but she was less and less certain her reasons would be deemed acceptable enough for her foster parents. They had probably looked forward to seeing her married and settled, as she would have become someone else's responsibility. Lady Hara would undoubtedly never forgive her for turning down such an opportunity, but would Lord Hara understand her qualms?
"Mister Takigawa is a wonderful person, and I am proud to count him as my cousin. I am also honoured to have excited such feelings in him, as I realise I did not deserve such attentions. Nonetheless, I had to refuse him, sir," declared Mai with a confidence she was far from feeling.
"You had to? You shameless…" started lady Hara, stopped short by her husband's commanding hand.
"Please sir, I beg of you, try to understand!" implored Mai, ignoring the older woman. "As honourable as they are, I cannot reciprocate my cousin's feelings. I shall forever respect him as a relative, but alas, nothing more. He deserves a spouse which would be worthy of his affections and would love him back with equal fervour. It would be unfair of me to accept him knowing I could never share his feelings nor provide him the happiness he deserves. I simply did not want to deprive him of it."
Mai breathed heavily, waiting expectantly for her foster parent's reaction. Lady Hara did not disappoint, as she was growling angrily about the foolishness of brainless romantic young girls. However, Lord Hara's eyes had softened considerably at her last words, and an odd look of understanding and regret had marred his features for a second.
His own marriage had been the result of his youthful haste before the beauty and apparent docile behaviour of the once young lady Hara. At the time the gentleman had thought having such a graceful and handsome woman by his side would grant him the marital felicity he had dreamed about. But said woman was only eager to marry wealth and nothing else, and once the marriage had been celebrated she had proven to be stubborn and narrow-minded, and not interested in the least in her husband's opinion. Mai's consideration for her suitor's future happiness reminded the gentleman bitterly of his own history.
"I see," simply said the man. "It appears, my dear child, that you have become a selfless and kind lady, and I cannot blame you for your decision."
"Lord Hara!" shrieked his spouse indignantly.
"Mai did for the best, and these shall be my last words on the matter. You can go," he addressed the orphan.
The young woman kissed his hand with emotion, overwhelmed with relief, and almost sobbed her thanks. As she was reaching the doorknob to flee the scene the gentleman called to her a last time.
"One more thing before you leave," he asked, "I have been informed that Shibuya also came to visit yesterday. We did not receive him considering the circumstances, of course, and I do not know why he came, but… There have been rumours after the ball at the Matzuzakis concerning the two of you, and though I do not pay attention to gossip I cannot help but wonder. Is this gentleman the reason why you turned down your cousin's proposal?"
Mai froze at the mention of the blue-eyed traitor. Naru was a deceiving imposter, and he didn't deserve her consideration. If anything, she only wished for him to rot in hell, where he probably belonged, for all the pain she had gone through because of him. Just hearing his name was making her blood boil and her heart ache, but her father's question was forcing her to ponder the influence he had had on her.
In all honesty her feelings for the man had been the trigger for her rejection. Not because she was saving herself for him, but because she had realized that Takigawa could never elicit such intense reactions from her. As annoying as it was, she had been irresistibly attracted by Shibuya, or whatever his name was, the moment she had spoken with him. He was irritating, insanely proud and condescending, but his piercing gaze and his so rare sincere smile had her under his spell. Whenever he was near she was losing her temper, her reason, and even her mind. So she had come to think that she could only give herself to a man who could spark her passion similarly, and regretfully Takigawa hadn't been able to.
But whatever his intentions were, Mai was determined not to get fooled by Naru ever again. After a small moment to collect herself she answered, her voice clear and poised.
"I have no idea myself about this gentleman's motives. Maybe it simply was a visit of courtesy, or an errand for Yasuhara. I do not know anything either about these rumors you heard, and I can assure you they are totally unfounded. I despise the man, his pride and arrogance, and I am fairly certain he has no interest in me."
"I did think it was strange," admitted lord Hara, "since you have only expressed displeasure concerning the gentleman. Very well then, you can go," he added with a smile.
Mai didn't waste a moment to follow his invitation and exited the room as fast as she could. Lady Hara, who had been chafing under her husband's injunction to keep quiet, was now very loudly and heatedly complaining about his permissiveness toward his charge, and the orphan had no desire to hear the hurtful comments.
As soon as she came out she was greeted by Masako, who had been shamelessly listening behind the door. Her sister kissed her affectionately and, taking her arm, led her upstairs where they could have some privacy. They both sat heavily on Mai's bed, legs shaking.
"I was certain papa would do the right thing. Oh Mai, I am so glad they did not decide anything rash!"
"So am I, believe me! I was truly terrified. However I do understand their incomprehension and their worry concerning my future. I have no fortune, and unless I get married I will not be able to live on my own. They most probably want me out of the house as soon as possible."
"Mai, what gave you this silly idea? Do not listen to mother's rants, and rest assured you are not unwanted here. In all honesty I am selfishly happy you do not get to leave my side," admitted Masako. "And do not worry about settling down either, if by some misfortune you do not find a man worthy of you, we will live together as two old and bitter spinsters," she joked.
After the taxing discussion with her foster parents Mai was far too happy to avoid heavy subjects and exchange some light jokes with her friend.
"I do not want you to become a spinster, no! I suggest you marry a handsome and extremely rich gentleman, put him under your spell and make him unable to refuse to offer shelter to an old and penniless friend of yours. Or better," laughed Mai, "have him convince an acquaintance, preferably handsome and wealthy too, to marry me. What do you think of my clever schemes?"
"I think they are both excellent," smiled her sister. "They just have a major flaw: where am I supposed to find such a man?"
"Oh, but we know one, and he conveniently lives in the neighbourhood!" teased Mai.
Masako's amused smile turned sad and resigned.
"But I fear he does not see me in this light. If he were interested, he would have proposed already."
"It is obvious to anyone that he loves you, Masako, please do not lose faith in him."
"It is hard not to," she sighed. "But it is does not matter in the least," she said with faked casualness, "I will happily stay his faithful friend if nothing else."
Mai took Masako's arm gently and let her head rest on her sister's shoulder.
"You shall get your happy ending. Remember, you have to marry well to provide for your old spinster sister."
"Oh Mai," sighed Masako while patting her friend's head.
The ladies then stayed side by side on the bed, both contemplating their future in a morose silence.
AN:Hello again! I know I know, it's been quite a long time since I last updated, but my pregnancy got me so tired that I had to take a break. To be honest I was unable to perform any physical or intellectual work for a while, hence my silence. Things are much better now, so here I am with a new chapter. Initially this was only the first part of the planned chapter, but I had to cut it in half because of its length. Part two will be (normally) published next week.
Saral, just make sure you have enough time for yourself, too. Everyone is just worried you'll... well, run out of time. There are people who care about you just as much as you care about those injured mooks, and they'll be devastated if you don't make it. You have dozens of admirable qualities about you and it would be a shame to lose you. Stay safe.
Saral: I’m not such a good mook to be worried about in general.’
Don't. Add. To. The. Pile. I'd rather see no family get the corpse of their whatever and a live mook than no family getting the corpse of their whatever and a DEAD mook. Please, Saral? Just... Just go! Just go man! You don't have the time! You don't have the time to take them! They're corpses! They're not exactly dead weight, and I understand that, but you're risking your lives with those who have already lost theirs? WOULD YOU REALLY WANT SOMEONE TO DRAG YOUR CORPSE AND RISK THEIR LIFE?!
Saral: Families who care about’m… Back in the Earth War, there were so many lives lost and, to this day, nobody is certain if their loved ones are dead or alive. It’s not like it matters if- ….there are better mooks to try to save. I just want to do my best for as long as I can.
Saral, there's /no time left/. Check if they're alive, if anything can be done, then please get to safety!
Saral: I’m goin’ to do just that!! Even if they’re not alive, I can’t just….leave’m here! I can get’m back to the pods and get’m back to their families. It’s the least I can do.
