50 Shades of Red || Chapter 28
pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Natasha Romanoff
summary: Wanda and Natasha spend some time apart. Natasha finally comes to some realizations and gets answers.
content warnings: Ms. Winters, angst, underage grooming (past)
word count: 3.2k+
masterlist
comments and reblogs are always appreciated! happy reading ♡
Wanda is miserable.
She throws herself into work, leaving her phone face down on her desk, so she doesn’t impulsively check it for messages. Not that she gets any, or at least from the one person she wants them from.
Her coworkers don’t comment, but she catches Steve giving her worried looks every so often. Agatha even brings her a package of cinnamon tea, leaving it on her desk when she thinks Wanda isn’t looking. It’s sweet of them, and it certainly makes her heart just a little less heavy.
Natasha had seemingly taken her ultimatum seriously, giving Wanda the space that she’d asked for. She knew she asked for it, but it still majorly sucked.
Several times already, Kate had to talk her down from sending a text to her girlfriend. She’d started taking Wanda’s phone from her in the apartment, making her leave it in the kitchen to charge overnight so she wouldn’t be tempted to send a late-night text. She’d been spending a lot of time with her roommate, and by proxy, Yelena.
The blonde didn’t seem to mind, her demeanor as cheery as ever.
“Don’t be silly, Wanda Maximoff,” she’d said one evening in her thick Russian accent, her fork full of macaroni. “You are not a bother. I like to spend time with you and Kate Bishop.”
“Does she always say your full name?”
Kate smirks at her as Yelena lets out a noise in protest, her cheeks bulging from the amount of macaroni she’d shoveled into her mouth. The woman really liked it, evidently.
As enjoyable as the time spent with Kate and Yelena was, Wanda had decided to try things solo in the city, especially on weekend nights. She knew she was encroaching on their couple’s night time, so she took it upon herself to take herself on solo dates.
So far, she’d been to the Space Needle - an experience as exhilarating as it was terrifying - as well as the Pike Place Market. She’d refused to stand in the long line for the Starbucks Reserve. It was closing soon, and tourists flocked to it like it was the last Starbucks they’d ever see.
Tonight, she was going to the zoo.
Presenting her ticket, she was ushered through the door. On a cool Friday night, there were plenty of couples strolling around. Wanda tried not to let her heart clench with sadness at the sight, determinedly making her way to the first exhibit that caught her eye.
There was a new exhibit, housing a Red Panda, just barely two years old. Wanda leaned against the railing, her eyes taking in the way it slowly ambled across a log. God, it was so cute. Checking the sign, she learned that her name was Ginger.
The little creature moved slowly, not a sense of urgency in her steps. She lazily batted at her half-full food dish, before making her way back to a tree and nestling comfortably on the branches, in perfect view for the people watching her.
Smiling, Wanda watched her for a few more minutes before turning to head further into the zoo. She’d seen something about a grizzly bear exhibit, and checked the directions before heading towards it.
As she rounded the corner into the bear exhibit, a flash of red hair caught her eye. Wanda paused, the bear forgotten momentarily, her chest suddenly feeling quite heavy. The woman turned, her face round and soft, nothing like Natasha’s sharp jaw and piercing eyes.
Shaking herself slightly, Wanda turned towards the enclosure, forcing thoughts of her girlfriend out as she caught sight of the bear.
“Cute, isn’t he?”
Wanda startled slightly, turning her head, a zookeeper smiling at her as he came to join her at the railing. The man positively exuded passion, his eyes excited as he rambled on.
“He’s a rescue; his mother sadly passed away, and one of the local animal rescue agencies that partners with us found him as a cub. He’s grown up quite pampered with us. He’s got 12,000 square feet of space, with a swimming area just over there. There’s glass right up next to the water, so when he takes a dip, you can even see him swim!”
Wanda doesn’t quite know what to say. The zookeeper doesn’t seem to mind.
“During his feeding times, the public can watch. We also do training with him for the public. Sadly, those were in the afternoon, but if you ever come back, you should totally try to catch one of them. He’s definitely got a personality.”
“I can see that,” Wanda finally says, smiling as the bear uses one of the large trees to scratch his back. There’s a child giggling as they watch, and Wanda finds it wholly endearing.
“Let me know if you have any questions; I’ll be in this exhibit for the rest of the evening,” the zookeeper says, before giving her a bright smile and walking towards a group of teenage boys, starting his spiel all over again.
Wanda slowly made her way through the zoo, skipping the butterfly garden. She didn’t care how much Kate made fun of her for it; butterflies are scary. They’re spastic; they fly all around her with no true sense of direction, and she can’t help her heart racing every time she’s near one.
She spots a cute lesbian couple near the shark exhibit, and promptly turns around. Her heart twists slightly, but she continues on.
Now is not the time to dwell on Natasha.
—
Natasha’s staff know better than to approach her when she’s in a bad mood. But this time is different. The woman has only been taking online meetings, either through video chat or phone, and refuses to let anyone into her office.
She doesn’t seem angry, though. That’s the most worrisome part of it.
“Ms. Romanoff, there is someone here-”
“Not today,” Natasha says, barely looking up as she passes by the front desk. She still looks put together, but her normally sharp eyes are trained on the floor, a slightly pensive expression on her face.
Two blonde employees share a look before turning back to her.
“Tell whoever it is that I’m only taking phone and video appointments this week,” Natasha instructs, finally looking up, offering them a tight smile. It’s brief, dropping from her lips the moment she passes by them.
There’s not much they can do but nod their assent. That is how the rest of the week goes, Natasha slipping past the front desk silently, her office door closed until she leaves.
Her employees try not to gossip, but it’s inevitable.
What is wrong with Natasha Romanoff? And how can they fix it?
Natasha has never been happier to own a private gym. It’s the only thing that takes her mind off of Wanda once she’s home for the evening.
She’s in the middle of a rear delt cable exercise, frustrated at the lack of response from Nicole. She’d texted the woman, even tried to call her, but to no avail. She’s never been ignored like this, but Natasha thinks it's because she knows what is coming.
There’s no other option. Natasha can’t lose Wanda; that’s a fact. She just wishes it wasn’t taking so much goddamn time to get a hold of her first and only domme.
Her phone buzzes, and the cable clangs against the machine as Natasha releases it, her eyes locked on the screen. Her heart jumps for a moment in anticipation before she reads the name.
Sighing, she answers it.
“Yelena-”
“Let me talk,” comes her sister’s voice, unusually serious.
“Is it Wanda? Has something happened?” Natasha’s mind starts racing, and she has half a mind to drive over to her girlfriend’s apartment that very instant.
An annoyed sigh comes from her phone. “What part of ‘let me talk’ was unclear, Natasha?”
“Ah, yes. I’m listening.”
She presses her lips together, pacing around the gym.
“I don’t know what is going on. Kate Bishop has been very tight-lipped, and Wanda Maximoff is distracting herself in any way possible,” Yelena begins, her accent bleeding out in the way it does when she’s frustrated. “What did you do, сестра? Did you break up with her? Because you are all moody and reclusive, and your girlfriend barely looks me in the eye anymore. Did you break her heart? I know you are my sister, Natasha Romanoff, but I swear to god I will drive over there right now to beat your ass if-”
“Okay,” Natasha interrupts her, finally taking a seat. Her heart rate is slowed slightly, now that she knows Wanda isn’t in any immediate danger. “I didn’t break up with her. She… gave me an ultimatum.”
There’s silence on the other end of the line. Then, “What sort of ultimatum?”
That’s the hard part. Natasha hasn’t told anyone, except Wanda, about her past relationship with Nicole. If you could even call it that. It was more of an on-and-off dom/sub dynamic, but one that Natasha had desperately needed. Now, though, the only woman she could possibly think of being with is Wanda.
“It’s a bit complicated.”
“Holy fucking shit, just tell me, сестра.” Yelena draws out. Natasha can imagine that she’s thrown her head back in annoyance, some of her inner brattiness seeping into her tone. It’s very reminiscent of their childhood, and Natasha almost cracks a smile.
“Before I met Wanda, I was sort of with this woman, just for sexual purposes. But that woman found Wanda and said some pretty hurtful things.”
“You’re omitting a lot of information, Natasha. I can tell.”
Natasha lets out a frustrated sigh. “Fine, she basically said that I would always come running back to her once I’m finished with Wanda. Which won’t happen, by the way, but it was still very upsetting for Wanda to hear. She basically said it was either Wanda or her. I’ve tried to call her, but she won’t respond to me. I want to make it known that things have ended between us, and I never want to see her again. But she won’t fucking respond, and I don’t know what to do.”
“And would you?”
“What?”
Yelena makes an impatient noise. “Would you go back to her? Ever?”
“I-” Natasha is at a loss for words. “No, I- well, I don’t want to. It’s just really confusing. I met this woman when I was young, and she’s been almost like a mentor to me, and-”
“How young?” Yelena interrupts.
“That doesn’t matter, Yelena; what I’m saying is-”
“нет,” Yelena’s voice is firm. “How young? How long had you been with this woman for Wanda to give you an ultimatum? She doesn’t seem like that type of woman.”
“I was fifteen.”
“Natasha. What the fuck.”
“It’s not like that, it was-”
Yelena’s voice comes out loud in her ear, and Natasha has to pull the phone away slightly. “It is exactly like that! That is too young of an age for anybody to start sleeping with you. How old was she? Was she an adult?”
“Well, yes. But I didn’t exactly see a problem with it. I was a willing participant.”
“Natasha,” Yelena’s voice is quieter this time, serious. “You cannot be a willing participant when you are a minor. It is not consensual. That woman, whoever she is, is a predator and a pedophile.”
“Well, I know that now, but I really don’t think she’s-”
Yelena sighs again. “Stop talking, сестра. Would you talk to a 15-year-old in a sexual way? Would you even touch them?”
Natasha’s body reacts before she can think, cringing harshly. “No.”
“So why is it okay for her to have done that? No matter how special she made you feel, or how mature she said you were, it is still wrong of her to do that.”
She doesn’t know what to say. It feels like something in her mind has shifted slightly, an uncomfortable feeling of pure disgust rising inside of her. Every memory she has of her old domme has a sour twinge to it, and she can feel her eyes watering against her will.
“You didn’t know. God, Natasha, 15 years old. How she must have groomed you into thinking it was okay.” Yelena’s voice is soft, and Natasha hates it. She’s not weak.
But the tears won’t stop. The first one rolls down her face, her eyes burning hotly, and she swipes at it before more begin to fall.
“Can you come over tonight?” Natasha hates the way her voice is shaking, her stomach rolling unpleasantly. She has the distinct feeling of revulsion, of her body feeling violated just thinking about the first time she’d met Nicole. The first time the woman had touched her.
The thought forces a heaving sob out of her throat, the sound desperate.
“Please, Yelena?”
“Of course,” comes her sister’s voice, the sound of car keys jingling in the background. “I will be there soon. I’m so sorry, Natasha.”
—
The apartment is quiet when Wanda gets home, the only sound coming from the living room. She can hear the faint noises of TikTok playing, and smiles. Kate and her never-ending doomscrolling.
“Wanda?”
“Yeah, it’s me,” she calls out, slipping her boots off next to the door. She kicks them to the side.
“Can you come in here?”
Right. That doesn’t sound ominous at all. The audio from Kate’s phone has stopped.
“What’s wrong?” Wanda asks, turning the corner to the living room and meeting her roommate’s eyes.
“I don’t know. But Yelena called Natasha and left in a rush. I-” Her roommate looks lost. “I think Natasha is breaking down.”
“Is she okay? Is it about me?” Wanda asks, a guilty feeling worming its way into her chest. She takes a seat on the couch, flopping into the cushions.
“No,” Kate shakes her head. “Yelena was saying something about grooming before she left, so… I think it’s probably about that.”
“Oh,” Wanda doesn’t know what to say. “I should call her.”
Kate practically launches herself across the couch, grabbing Wanda’s phone from her hands. “Absolutely not! She has Yelena; she’s going to be fine, I promise. She just needs to figure her shit out and maybe come to a few realisations while she’s at it. God, you really picked one of the most damaged people in the city to date, didn’t you?”
“Oh my god, Kate,” Wanda rolls her eyes, snatching her phone back and setting it on the couch. “She’s not damaged; she just had someone in her life at a young age who shouldn’t have been there. That’s not her fault.”
“No, I know that, I just,” Kate chews on her lip for a moment. “I just want you to be happy.”
Wanda leans over, grabbing Kate’s hand. “I am happy, Kate, that’s the problem. I’m so fucking happy when I'm with her, and I think I’m-” She stops herself.
“What? You think you’re what?” Kate prompts, her eyes gentle.
“I think I’m falling in love with her.”
“Oh, Wanda.”
She clears her throat, forcing back the swell of emotions that threatens to rise. “Yeah, so. That’s why I gave the ultimatum. I can’t have a woman like that hanging over both our heads. And she definitely can’t be a part of any aspect of Natasha’s life.”
“God, I hate how emotionally mature you are,” Kate says, throwing one of the decorative pillows at her. “Now come here and watch a movie with me. Yelena is gone, so you’ll have to be my cuddle buddy for tonight.”
—
Nicole finally responds. It only took eleven days.
Eleven days of no contact. Eleven days of Wanda coming up with more and more what-if scenarios. Eleven days of Natasha working through internal shame and disgust. Yelena sat with her while they searched for a therapist, telling her it wasn’t embarrassing or weak to work through this with a professional. Eleven days of both Wanda and Natasha waiting for an answer, albeit from different people.
“Hello?” Natasha says, proud that her voice doesn’t tremble. The door to her office is closed, thank god. She doesn’t want anyone to witness the wreck she’s going to be after this phone call.
“Natasha,” a gentle yet commanding voice sounds out on the other line. It fills Natasha with discomfort. She can’t believe she ever found it soothing. “Sorry I missed your calls, dear. I was out of the country doing-”
“We need to talk, Nicole.”
There’s a pause on the other side of the line.
“What is this about?”
Natasha glances at her notes. Yelena had helped her come up with things to say, so she wouldn’t flounder in the heat of the moment.
“We’re done,” she says flatly. “I don’t want to speak to you again. I don’t want to hear your voice or have you in my life anymore. As soon as this call is over, I’m blocking your contact. I know you and my mother are close friends. If she invites us to the same event, I will not interact with you, and I expect the same from you.”
“Is this about your little girlfriend?” The older woman hisses, her voice turning cold.
“No.” Natasha feels a swell of anger rise. She pushes it down as best that she can. “I know you spoke to her, and I know what you said. That was inappropriate, and I won’t have you interfering with my relationship anymore. I don’t want to ever hear from Wanda that you’ve spoken to her or even looked in her direction again. If I need to, I will get a restraining order against you for both myself and Wanda.” She swallows. “I need to focus on my relationship, and my future with Wanda. I’ve already lost so much of my life to you. I won’t let you take this too.”
“Oh, Natasha. You gave me your submission so willingly,” the woman begins, her voice returning to its original sweetness.
“No, I didn’t,” Natasha snaps, gripping her notebook tightly. The paper crinkles slightly. “I was 15; I wasn’t able to give you anything. You took it. This is over, Nicole. I never want to hear from you again.”
She ends the call. Her thumb trembles as she blocks the woman’s number, email, and any social media handles. She’d had her legal team go over any and all information they could find on the woman, and she blocked every way the woman could contact her. She would tell Wanda to do the same. But for now, this is enough.
There’s a restraining order waiting to be filed, just in case. Natasha hopes she never has to use it. That the woman would respect her wishes. She owes her that much, at least.
She’d always thought the expression of weight lifting off someone’s shoulders to be silly, but it’s exactly how she feels. The oppressive self-isolation she’d buried herself under felt lighter, the knowledge that the woman wouldn’t be able to contact her again making her limbs feel almost weightless.
She picks up the phone again, this time clicking on Wanda’s name.
Natasha would call, but she knows her girlfriend is at work. So she types a simple text, hoping it’s enough.
It’s done. She’s gone. We should talk. Dinner at mine? Anytime you’re free. I’ve missed you, Wanda.
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