#chatonesque

[danger-archive]

chatonesque replied to your post: EEK i just reached my FIRST HUGE MILESTONE i’m...

congrats on 10 followers (’:

i know!!! can you believe it?????? just yesterday i had minus -4 :’) 

[teenhero-a]

chatonesque replied to your post: remember when tyra picked two amy’s to be on the...

FUCK

two selinas stand before me........ and one of y’alls gonna have to change your name in the hopes of becoming america’s next top model

[yasperalta]

lil pencil symbol. make it sad. make it Unfortunate

[robinsredhood]

@chatonesque

He watched as another millionaire stood up to give a speech congratulating himself for all he’d done to help those less fortunate than him, Jason had a feeling he’d see more than philanthropic endeavors if he got even a quick peek into their real business dealings. He finished his drink before glancing at the woman standing next to him at the bar “Rich assholes, am I right?” 

[yasperalta]

@chatonesque and @yasperalta are now taking applications for our very own akiva schaffer applicants must be 20, the shit, thoughful as fuck, a good listener even when they're exhausted, crazy hygenic, and they must have that diaper money... tiny eyeballs are not a necessity.  all interested parties please feel free to send in a picture and their best akiva impression as well as evidence that they could probably direct some stuff and write comedy. extensive knowledge of the lonely island and their music/videos/movies is required. responsibilities of an akiva schaffer include but are not limited to:  + being the rock of the group  + being soft-homo  + willingness to be lawrence dunn + helping to write dope but terrible raps  + willingness to have a call at 3 AM about absolutely nothing + wILLINGNESS TO GAIN TWO DUDES WHO ARE UR FAM.  if this video resonates with you, you’re prolly hella fit to be akiva schaffer. write us and tell us why! normally job applications don’t say this kinda stuff but we’re pretty light and breezy. if you’ve got a turtleneck and chain u are 100% qualified so jot that down.  SERIOUS APPLICANTS ONLY THIS IS A SERIOUS THING AND WE’RE SERIOUS ABOUT IT. thank u,  2 guyz xoxox

[abouttiimeadjacent]

      ❝ I don't need help, I just need to know what year it is. I'm a time traveler. ❞ He's very serious about it, but doesn't expect her to believe him. People usually didn’t.

@chatonesque

[gotholtzmanned-blog]

          ❛   trust me when i say   :   i love me a good pun.   BUT TACO BELL HAS BETRAYED ME FOR THE LAST TIME   !!   if you say you’ve got some spiked mountain dew i expect NO LESS than 5% alcohol.   NO LESS.   ...   first the crunchwrap supreme that wasn’t ENTIRELY wrapped so it looked like it had a tomato-filled asshole   ...   now THIS   ...   ❜

@chatonesque    ❮  ♡  ❯  

[capitolhost]

          '  alright,   m'dam,   here  is  your  order.   '        box  opened,   scent   of  pizza   all   to   well  known     ——    woven  into  hair  &  clothes,    never  quite  leaving  it  behind  with  showers  or  perfume.       pair  of  paws  stepped  before  her,     mind  rung   for  moments,  wondering  whether       the   coffee  lack    sensed  truly  such  a  distress,    though  fingers  tipped  towards  the  black  cat,  then  another  one.    '  you  a cat  lover  ?  '

@chatonesque // sc