Viktor and reader learning how to kiss together I š„ŗš„ŗš„ŗ
āI donāt know! What if they want to kiss me?ā you whine.
Pacing restlessly back and forth in your best friendās small dorm, youāre having a crisis. Days prior, youād been asked out on a date by one of your classmates - a nice person, really. Smart, easy on the eyes, kind and courteous. There really wasnāt any reason you should have wanted to say no.
Aside from the fact that youāve been in love with someone else for over a year.
Youād been scared, though. If youād so much as suggested that you had feelings for someone, everyone would know exactly who you were talking about: Viktor, the only person you ever really hung around with.
āYouāre the one who said yes to a date,ā the man in question sighs, not bothering to look up from his textbook. āSurely you knew that kissing was a possibility?ā
You pause mid-step, and turn to him.
āVik, if you could take this seriously, please? Iām about to have a panic attack.ā
He sighs deeply, and lolls his head up to fix you with an unamused stare. āIf you didnāt want to go out with them, why did you say yes?ā
His question makes you want to rip your hair out with frustration. Because I canāt tell them that I like you! you want to say, even though doing such would completely defeat the point.
āI donāt know,ā you groan, plopping down on the bed beside him. āThere wasnāt any viable reason for me to say no!ā
Viktorās face pinches slightly, drawing into a somewhat-concerned frown. āYou know that youāre allowed to decline offers simply because youāre not interested, right?ā
You flop backwards, grabbing a pillow to shove into your face.
āIām serious,ā he repeats, trying in vain to remove the plush object from your grasp. āThere doesnāt have to be a reason youāre not interested in someone. No is a complete sentence.ā
He finally succeeds in wrestling the pillow away from you, tossing it to the other side of the bed. But what gives him pause is the way your lips squish into a pout - the way you avoid looking at him with your pretty, tear-filled eyes.
āI thought I might be able to feel something for them,ā you sniffle, trying to blink away the wetness gathering behind your lashes. āI thought that maybe I could get to know them, and then I could fall in love. Iām supposed to be excited about this kind of thing! But instead Iām just!ā
Viktor watches you carefully for a couple seconds, before slowly lowering himself down on the mattress beside you, rolling over onto his side to face you.
āWhich part of it scares you?ā he wonders, with a considerably softer tone. āIs it the dating itself? The uncertainty? The pressure? The physical acts?ā
You sniffle again, turning your head to look at him.
āAll of it,ā you admit. āAll of it scares me, because of who it might be with. I donātā¦Iāve never done this kind of thing - any of it. And Iā¦donāt want it with them. Thereās only one person I trust to take care of me with that sort of stuff, andā¦ā
You stare at him for several long seconds, before breaking away to gaze at the ceiling.
ā...never mind. Itās kind of stupid, anyways. I should just tell them that I changed my mind.ā
You move to push yourself up, so you can collect the few things youād brought with you and leave. Of course Viktor wouldnāt want to talk about your relationship woes - heād never shown you to have any kind of interest in anyone. You doubt he even knows how to help.
But to your surprise, right before you rise off the bed, he catches your arm a little too tightly.
āItās not stupid,ā he says, before you can ask him what heās doing. āJust because you donāt feel the way you think you should, doesnāt mean itāsā¦stupid.ā
His grip on you loosens by a fraction.
āIāmā¦kind of the same way. Iām not interested in anyone until I know them already, but getting to know people isā¦ā he sighs sharply in frustration, āitās weird. Certain things are expected to happen, and-ā
āAnd we have no idea what weāre doing,ā you cut him off.Ā
The two of you stare slack-jawed at each other for several moments, before breaking into a fit of airy giggles.
āGods above,ā you mumble. āI wish we could just get it over with! Thereās too much pressure on first kisses, and that makes it scary.ā
And then, his fingers tentatively seeking out your own, wrapping around your hand and drawing little patterns on your palm.
āWe could practice with each other. Weāre friends already, so itās not like itās some stranger who might take it the wrong way.ā
Heat rises to your face as his words sink in.
How terribly you want to say yes, to scoop him up in a tender embrace and kiss the breath out of him. How you want to hear his desperate little noises, and feel how soft and pliant his lips are.
āAre you sure?ā you ask. āBecause you need to be sure. I donāt want to do something that you donāt want-ā
āI want it,ā he interrupts, his face immediately lighting up with a rosy hue. āI mean- Iām sure-ā
Mostly to save him from the embarrassment of trying to explain his choice of words.
But also because youāve been waiting forever to do so.
Heās tense at first, unmoving and quiet, his hands hovering over you as if he doesnāt quite know where to put them - where you want him to put them. You donāt really know what youāre doing either, but you know that you want him to touch you, to feel his warmth sink into your skin.
You pull away from him to give him some direction, but much to your surprise, he chases after you. Enticing you into another kiss, finally moving his lips against your own. Heās obviously unpracticed at such a thing, though you can hardly fault him for it - you are too.Ā
And if youāre being honest, itās incredibly charming how he only seems to gain enthusiasm the longer you spend at it. Even when your teeth accidentally knock together, it only garners a breathless chuckle.
You donāt know how long you spend locked in your awkward little dance, hands wandering and squeezing and kneading at each other, but when you finally find the need to part youāre both breathing heavy. Fallen sideways on the bed so you could press into each other more.
He sets his forehead on yours, bringing his hands up to gently encircle your face.
āDonāt go on that date,ā he nearly pleads, honey brown eyes staring straight into yours. āI donāt think I could take it if I saw you with someone else.ā
