i trusted you for e&c please terr! love me some angst <3
Mal!! thank you<333 I have to admit my absolute stupidity because I read "i trusted you for e&c" and I was like ??? ohmygod what have i done why had mal trusted me and now she doesnt??" and then it clicked:DDD i love how super dumb i can be
also, I am not sure what this is. I have the hardest time writing rn but I guess I cannot overcome it without, you know, writing, so here is this mess - at least it is angsty! <3
when jade turns moss (e & c)
There’s a fire in her eyes as she look up at him.
There is often a fire in her eyes – a flame burning, turning the green of her eyes into the most beautiful shade of jade, sparkling with passion.
This fire is different, though. There are no sparks, only flames that burn and burn until jade turns into dark moss green and her eyes are not full of passion. They are dark and deep and blazing with rage.
„I trusted you,“ she says calmly. Quietly. Her voice nothing like the burning gaze.
Ethan cannot move. He wishes he could, he wishes he could reach out and cup her cheek and break the spell – the curse – that has fallen over them.
(And it is almost funny, for him to carry such wish, knowing more than well that he is then one casting the curse.)
„I have always trusted you,“ Chiara continues and the fire in her eyes does not slake, even when her voice shakes as she says always. „I have never, not once in our time knowing each other, doubted you.“
Ethan still cannot move. He just keeps standing there, fists clenched at his sides, remorse engraved in every wrinkle, every muscle of his face. But what of it. It is too late now. (Too late.)
Chiara’s lower lip quavers. Her eyes shine now, though there is still no passion, just unshed tears glowing.
„I trusted you to trust me,“ she whispers, and even though her voice is no longer as calm or as steady, she doesn’t allow herself to raise it, to lose her control. Quiet whispers and voice trembling and Ethan prays she could just scream – nothing could be as wrenching as her silent ache.
The tears threaten to fall – but Chiara doesn’t allow herself to lose her control. (Not now and not ever.)
Before the first one drops and falls on the wooden floor of Dr. Ramsey’s office, she turns on her heel and leaves the room.
And Ethan cannot move.
Taglist ❤ (I am sorry for tagging you in such tiny thing but after the nothing I have been offering lately I suppose we shall call it a progress😂)
Tumblr is full of OH weddings now that OH3 is over. Do you have any wedding HC or moodboards or edits for Ethan and beautiful Chiara?
Hey anon!❤ thank you for thinking of my babes!
I do not exactly have headcanon or any moodboard, because I swore I would never write a wedding fic😂 but I am very lucky because Chiara's beautiful FC did a photoshoot in a wedding dress and it fits my idea of their wedding perfectly
The wedding is small and it's on a beach, because Chiara loves ocean and Ethan doesn't exactly have a strong opinion on that. Only their loved ones are invited and it's very chill - they share their vows (I shared them already but I cannot find the post now), they laugh a lot. Ethan is wearing a dark blue suit trousers and white button up with his sleeves rolles up (that's very important) - he intended to wear the whole suit and all, but Chiara conviced him that many people see him being that formal, while only the closest ones know that in love, relaxed Ethan and so he doesn't have to be clothed formally on his wedding. It is all very nice and happy and full of love. They dance and talk to their friends and laugh, dance some more. The sand is everywhere and Chiara spends most of the day and night barefoot. No drama, no big deal, just two people and a handful of their friends and family wanting to celebrate that they are disgustingly in love.
Ter! Feel free to skip, darling. I know you have a lot o your plate right now! If you're up for it, here is the next round for E&C
Notes: Answer the following with pictures (dialogue from your characters is optional!). Collages are highly encouraged if you want to answer a question with multiple pictures because tumblr mobile only allows 10 total pics (there are 10 questions). Otherwise, tumblr on a desktop lets you add multiple pictures!
Also, don’t worry about picking pictures of your face claim (if any) to answer these! Any picture of the outfit/place, no matter who is wearing it, makes absolute sense! Have fun!
For MC
Favorite picture of Ethan at your wedding?
Favorite picture on your honeymoon (of him or otherwise)?
Favorite outfit(s) on him?
What does your home look like?
Picture of your spouse's last purchase.
For Ethan
Favorite picture of your wife at your wedding?
Favorite picture on your honeymoon (of her or otherwise)?
Favorite outfit(s) on him/her?
Picture of a dream getaway or date you would surprise her with?
Last picture she sent you.
Thank you so so much for sending these, lovely Bree <3 I know I still have the last ones unanswered, but I promise to get to that soon! I always enjoy this so much, so thank you again <3
Chiara
Favorite picture of Ethan at your wedding?
"Ah," Chiara grins, "I know exactly which one that would be. We do not have many photos from our wedding because it was a small thing, but my absolutely all time favorite would be this one."
"Seriously?" Ethan lets out a long exhale.
"So the ceremony is over, we are oficially married and all, you know? It's time for fun." Chiara explains. "And Bryce comes to Ethan and goes like 'hey Ethan I bet you would lose against me in a swimming race.' And it was a joke, you know? But of course, Ethan's competitive brain decided to take that challenge and the next thing I know, he is handing me his wedding band - it was on his finger for what? 15 minutes? - so that he doesn't lose it and is jumping into the ocean with Bryce."
"Well, I won," Ethan mutters in his defense.
"Yes, Bryce says he let you as a part of his wedding gift."
Favorite picture on your honeymoon (of him or otherwise)?
"I know!" Chiara almost jumps on the spot and immediately looks for the photo.
""Everything is a joke to you, isn't it?" Ethan asks as he spots it - though he doesn't look surprised at her choice.
"We were snorkeling in Santorini and something bit him - poor man, he was completely paralyzed around his torso. Our guide made him lay like this for an hour."
"Hilarious, yes," Ethan mutters but doesn't supress his own smirk at the memory.
"Ooookay, I will choose another one," Chiara says at last as she keeps looking for another photo.
"It's the unbottoned shirt and sleeves rolled up for me," she smiles.
Favorite outfit(s) on him?
"Don't get me wrong, I love those suits on him. We all know how hot he is in those. But I love seeing him in sweatpants and casual clothes the most. I don't know why that is. it's just... that's Ethan at home, you know? Relaxed Ethan. I love relaxed Ethan the most."
What does your home look like?
Picture of your spouse's last purchase.
"The last thing you bought?" she turns to Ethan, thinking.
"Groceries this morning," Ethan responds matter-of-factly.
"Maybe something other than that, uh- I know! Ohmygod of course! He bought me the David Bowie LP that I have been talking about for years!"
Ethan
Favorite picture of your wife at your wedding? & Favorite picture on your honeymoon (of her or otherwise)?
"She was far better at having her wedding pictures taken than me."
"Wow, normal wedding photo and a normal honeymoon photo? Now I look like I am the only one who makes fun of you all the time," Chiara grins.
"I detect no lie."
Favorite outfit(s) on him/her?
"I love it when she wears dress. Any dress, really, but this particular piece - all the whole outfit, as you would put it - is my favorite thing to see. If she must be clothed, that is, of course."
"Yes, Ramsey, we all know what truly is your favorite thing to see," Chiara rolls her eyes, but it's easy to see the tips of her ears turning red.
Picture of a dream getaway or date you would surprise her with?
"Kasbah du Toubkal in Atlas Mountains. It's her 'ultimate dream date spot'."
Last picture she sent you.
"Last pic she sent me is Lahela when he was six years old. It came with a caption 'look at how adorable our little boy was!"
"Show it, then," Chiara nudges him.
"I think we might be a bit boring, Ethan," Chiara says as she goes through the photos she sent to Ethan in last month. "Bryce, my selfie, Jenner, cereals I wanted you to buy for breakfast, the cute dog at the park I sent you, another selfie... Pretty boring."
"I do not find them boring," Ethan shakes his head. "And you know what your father always taught you."
"Yeah, I know," Chiara rolls her eyes again, a wide grin on her face. "'Do not send your naked photos through texts to anyone, those things can get hacked so easily and blah blah blah'," she chuckles then and adds: "I am pretty sure Alicia doesn't care about his advice at all."
Three years of Christmas Eve for Ethan and Chiara.
Warnings: some kissing, some cliché like mistletoes, mutual pining in the first part, other than that just fluff fluff fluff
Words count: 4 300
Author’s note: Here we are, in times when Valentine’s Day fics are being posted, I finished my Christmas Fic. Yay! It was supposed to be made of three equally long parts but I went crazy with the first one (it was my first time writing about Book One and I just truly enjoyed it). However, I hope you enjoy <3
Intern Year
It took longer for Ethan to finally walk the deserted corridor than he expected, but he decided to work on Christmas Eve for a reason – as he did every year – and checking on patients had to be the main priority. Of course it had to.
Yet, his steps carried him more swiftly than usually and he could feel his forehead ache from the constant concerned furrow of his brows. Naveen was feeling especially unwell these past two days and Ethan hated the idea of his older friend left alone and in pain on the day he loved that much.
Not that Ethan understood. Christmas, as every other holidays made no sense to him and if it was up to him, the whole nonsense would be erased and never celebrated again. But Naveen loved the festivities and the ‚merry spirit‘ of them, and so Ethan tried his hardest to keep him company for as long as he could.
Crossing the corridor enough to see the door of Naveen’s room, Ethan’s heart jumped in his chest as he noticed that they were slightly ajar.
Damn the man if he tried to take a walk.
Opening the door to the room fully, a soft breath of relief left Ethan at the sight of Naveen peacefully laying in his bed, his eyes closed but a gentle smile formed on his lips.
And he was not alone.
Ethan’s breath hitched in his throat again.
He couldn’t move, he couldn’t form a coherent sentence, he just kept standing in the doorway, devoured by the scene in front of him.
Chiara was sitting at one of the chairs next to Naveen’s bed, her back turned to the door and a small book in her hand.
And she was reading aloud.
„In fact I have no other choice
than, being alive, to live.
And every day,
into its every moment,
I lead this highly destructible body.
And if hope morse-signals: life
while hopelessness outruns possible death,
my decision is made -
I side with hope.
You can find me anytime
near its hidden paths.
Talking or silent.
I guard the human dream.
And I hold out
where I stand.“
Ethan’s throat tightened and he thanked the universe for the fact that the two doctors – the two doctors that meant so much to him – haven’t yet noticed his presence.
He was not sure what exactly made him feel the emotions currently filling his mind, and he could easily blame it on the merry spirit of Christmas, had he believed in it.
Maybe it was the melody of Chiara’s voice as she read the poem, so soft and gentle and beautiful. Or maybe it was a sight of Naveen, sick and weak and dying and yet looking so peaceful.
Perhaps it was the combination of both, the woman that captured his mind more often than he was willing to admit and the man that was like a father to him, spending time together in a perfect harmony, the air around them so serene it made Ethan wonder if his interruption would even be a welcome one.
„This one was my favorite,“ Naveen spoke into the silence, although he didn’t open his eyes.
„You said that after I finished the one before,“ Chiara chuckled softly, closing the book in her hands.
It was a miracle – not that Ethan believed in those – that Naveen managed to laugh at Chiara’s reponse without coughing. They looked almost... normal. As if his life was not ending anytime soon.
„It truly is a pity that there are only so few of his poems translated to English.“
„When you get through this,“ Chiara replied and Ethan hated that he could hear the sad smile in her words, despite not seeing her face at all. He had no right to know her that well. „You should learn the language and translate all of his poems.“
Naveen only hummed in a response, letting them both believe for a blissful moment that he would get through it.
It was the time for Ethan to make them aware of his presence. He coughed politely and stepped inside, doing his best to maintain a stoic mask on his face.
„Ethan!“ Naveen smiled brightly, just as brightly as Chiara did when she noticed Ethan, and for a moment it was easy to forget who they were, where they were.
„What are you doing here, Dr. Ray?“ Ethan asked instead of greeting and almost immediately winced at the choice of his words, knowing that he sounded rather rude.
When truly, he was simply surprised. He was not aware of Chiara working today.
„I am sorry, Dr. Ramsey,“ her bright smile turned into somehow sheepish one and she put the book on her chest, as if it could serve as a shield protecting her from Ethan’s inevitable anger. „All my patients are stable so I stopped by to keep Dr. Banerji company, at least for a while.“
„And what a pleasing company it was!“ Naveen exclaimed, shooting Ethan a reprimanding look, obviously not pleased by his behavior. „Are you finished with your tradition?“
Ethan tensed visibly and only gave away a stiff nod, the last thing he wished to share the tradition with the younger doctor.
„The... tradition?“ Chiara dared to ask despite his less than kind reaction. „I didn’t take you as someone with Christmas traditions.“
„I am not,“ Ethan spoke flatly, sitting on the chair on the other side of Naveen’s bed.
There were seconds of rather awkward silence between them before Chiara stated that she would leave them alone, wished Naveen Merry Christmas while hugging him and left the room.
It was as if warmth of the air went with her.
It didn’t take long for Naveen to chew Ethan out for how he behaved to Chiara – and Ethan noticed the affection, the gentleness lacing Chiara’s name as Naveen said it. He was right, of course. Ethan was hard for no reason and he wasn’t proud of himself, but what was he supposed to do? Ever since getting back from Miami, it was becoming more and more difficult to control his actions with her.
But Naveen was right. He had no right and he should make it all better.
And so after Naveen made it clear he would like to sleep, Ethan checked the schedule to make sure none of Chiara’s friends were working and then with a bated breath clicked on Chiara’s contact.
E: Where are you?
The reply came almost immediately, a sign that there was not emergency – which Ethan wasn’t sure he considered a good sign or not.
C: The on-call room. Why?
It didn’t really make sense to Chiara, why was Ethan texting her, him of all people. If there was an emergency, he could have easily paged her.
The answer to her question came quickly.
E: I am about to grab some take-out. I was wondering if you would care to join me in my office to share a meal.
Saying that Chiara gasped would be an understatement. She had to blink twice to make sure she was not missing a message stating that he sent it to the wrong number. But no.
C: Are you inviting me over for a Christmas dinner?
E: Do not be ridiculous. Do you like Italian kitchen?
C: Sure.
E: 9 PM, my office, then.
And then nothing. Chiara was almost absolutely sure that she was dreaming, because there was no way the same Dr. Ramsey that has been avoiding her ever since the conference would be inviting her for a – definitely Christmas – dinner.
But free food is free food and she would be lying if she said she wouldn’t welcome a distraction. No matter how hard she tried to stay positive, she missed her family terribly today.
And Ethan was a rather pleasant distraction after all.
At 10 PM, with her risotto eaten, a paper cup filled with an apple juice – the best option for a toast for them - she managed to get in the cafateria in her hand, Chiara found herself sitting comfortably at the leather couch in Ethan’s office, one of her leg crossed over the another, her white coat shrugged off and hanging over the arm of the couch.
It surprised her to see Ethan next to her, looking almost equally relaxed. One of his arms was draped over the back of the couch and Chiara could feel the warmth radiating from the skin of his hand, on her neck.
"So... is there a point in asking you about the tradition Dr. Banerji mentioned?" Chiara asked after finishing her drink, mischievous sparks dancing in her irises.
"No," Ethan replied immediately, although his voice wasn't nearly as stern as he wanted it to be. The right corner of his mouth twitched slightly, Chiara noticed, as if her question amused him.
Ethan wanted to share it with her, he almost let it slip, but he made a promise in Miami - to her or rather to himself, he didn't know - and damn him if he didn't keep that promise.
Professionals.
That's all they should, all they could, be.
And as if to prove himself wrong in the very next moment, he spoke again, asking a question that professionals shouldn’t want to ask.
"Are you going to share your reason for not visiting your family over Christmas?"
Chiara shrugged, her smile not quite faltering but losing some of its brightness.
He didn’t mean to pry, but he was curious. Chiara mentioned home and family fairly often and back in Miami, he could hear her on the phone with her mother – and it was exactly the kind of call a child and a parent that love each other share.
He found it only logical that Chiara would want to spend Christmas in San Francisco.
“I am not sure I would get that many free days as an intern.”
“All your friends have gotten three free days, so would you. It is not much, but it enough to take a quick trip to San Francisco.”
She laughed softly, her gaze strained with the thought or memories, Ethan didn’t know.
“We don’t celebrate Christmas at home since…” she stopped herself and cleared her throat and it didn’t take a diagnostician to see that she was looking for a way to tell Ethan enough without telling him the whole truth.
“It has been six years since we celebrated in San Francisco. For these last years, me, my mom and my sister travel abroad at the time of Christmas. This year, they are in Singapore,” she chuckled and turned to Ethan, a smile on her face wide, however her gaze still lost in the haze. “I am sure three days wouldn’t be enough for a quick trip to Singapore.”
Ethan laughed shortly at that and shook his head, no that would not, and he fought the urge to ask more, to get to know her more, to tell her about his mother, because professionals.
That is why Chiara hasn’t asked him back, why are you working today?, because he made it clear he wanted to keep things professional and she was not brave enough to push him again.
“I would want to stay in Boston anyway,” she added after a while, looking away again and she was biting her lips nervously.
Ethan didn’t want her to be nervous around him but damn, her teeth sinking into her lower lip and her cheeks flushed slightly and it took the last remnants of his strength to repeat the word in his head, professional, professional, professional.
“Why?” he asked.
“Well I knew that Dr. Banerji would be here and I thought it would be nice to spend some time with him. And I didn’t know if you would be here so,…”
She trailed off, not knowing what else to say and when she turned to Ethan, it surprised her to see how close he has gotten, his whole upper body slouching to her and his face so close she could feel his breath on her face.
And it would be easy to believe that he was only listening intently, that was the reason of his sudden proximity, it would be right to believe so, but Chiara was anything but stupid.
“Ethan,” she exhaled quietly and noticed how his pupils dilated at the sound of his name rolling off her lips.
She raised her hand and rested it on his cheek slowly, waiting for his reaction.
And in that moment, there were many words swirling through Ethan’s mind but professionals was not one of them.
He leaned closer, so close his lips brushed Chiara’s ever so softly and-
-and her pager went off.
Chiara stood up abruptly and took the pager out of her pocket.
“I guess that’s my call,” she smiled and it didn’t go unnoticed by Ethan that she sounded out of breath, that his effect on her was as strong as hers on him and he cursed himself for letting the damn word slip out of his mind.
He also cursed himself for not kissing her earlier, so that he could feel her lips fully before the pager went off.
“Merry Christmas, Ethan,” Chiara smiled at him for the last time and left the office before he could respond.
And Ethan thought that if he could celebrate the Christmas like this, with her, every years, maybe the holiday wouldn’t need to be erased.
Second Year
“So you already finished this tradition of yours today?” Chiara asked with that sweet, innocent smile on her lips as she stood between Ethan’s legs as he kept sitting on his chair, gently removing his glasses.
Only then she kissed the bridge of his nose softly, caressing his cheek with such care it almost didn’t make sense to Ethan.
“Yes,” he smiled back at her, enjoying their position and the fact that for once, Chiara was above his eye level and he had to raise his head to meet her gaze.
“And you are not going to tell me what it is?”
“No,” now it was Ethan’s turn to smile all-too-innocently and he knew Chiara was burning with curiosity.
He wouldn’t mind telling her now, but he would lie if he said that he was not enjoying seeing his Chiara, usually so composed and calm, freaking out about his secret Christmas tradition.
She leaned down to capture his lips and Ethan wondered if that was a part of her plan because if she’d continue to roll her tongue like that, he would tell her everything she would wish to hear.
And she knew that.
Ethan grabbed the back of her thighs, making her stumble slightly and sit in his lap and soon their kiss turned into proper make out session, his hands roaming her bare torso hungrily while her hands tugged on his hair, leaving them in the disheveled state she adored so much.
Before their Christmas evening could turn into the gala’s sequel – the memory still fresh in Ethan’s mind – Chiara pulled out with a reluctant sigh.
“My mom and Alicia told me to say Merry Christmas from them to you.”
Ethan nodded in thanks, however he couldn’t contain a sigh leaving him. He knew Chiara missed her family.
“Do you regret staying here instead of going with them?”
“Are you crazy?” Chiara laughed and unlike last year, Ethan remembered, her laugh was sincere and full of joy. “I am cold enough here in Boston. I wouldn’t wish to freeze to death in freakin’ Iceland.”
Not able to stop himself from rolling his eyes, Ethan let out a soft laugh too, however he had to agree with Chiara – the woman was cold all the time. He couldn’t imagine her hitchhiking through Iceland – a trip that evolved from what Chiara called ‘her mom’s middle age crisis’ idea’.
“And again, with the time off I took after the senator’s attack and Edenbrook’s closing, I wouldn’t be able to leave for three weeks.”
“You know I would sign off your vacation, three weeks or not,” Ethan mumbled into her neck.
Chiara smacked his arm lightly, an amused grin on her lips.
“And that, Dr. Ramsey, is not at all professional.”
Ethan wanted to argue that he could think of many not at all professional activities that happened in this very office, but sometimes not reminding himself of his terrible failure at staying colleagues was for the best.
Not that this relationship was by any means a failure. Letting himself fail his principles for once in his life turned out to be the best decision he has ever made.
“I knew you would be working,” Chiara added much more seriously and she was, of course, right. There were reasons Ethan was dedicated to work every Christmas Eve, reasons he never talked about but were enough for him to not to break the habit.
“And you would rather spend your Christmas at work with me, than in Europe with your family?”
“Yes,” Chiara stated simply, not a single hint of doubt in her voice. None.
Who knows how much longer we are going to work in this hospital together, she thought but didn’t say it aloud, not wanting to ruin the bright mood.
Checking his watch, Ethan gestured at Chiara to stand up and followed her in her tracks, trying his best to tame the mess his hair has become.
“I am going to pick up the food. Are you going to join me?”
“Nope, I still need to check on some patients. I will accompany you to the nurses’ station.”
They left the office together and Ethan still couldn’t quite comprehend this new reality for them, the life where they walked the corridor freely next to each other, Ethan’s hand put on Chiara’s lower back gently, and he didn’t need to worry about anyone seeing them.
“Dr. Ray, Dr. Ramsey,” Marlene smiled at them from the desk and noticing Ethan’s relaxed shoulders, she dared to go on. “Didn’t you want to spend your Christmas outside of the work?”
Chiara shrugged and smiled widely, not giving Ethan a chance to ruin Marlene’s mood by his sour response – it didn’t matter how relaxed he was, he couldn’t stand people asking him personal questions.
“We like to work. Someone has to do it even today, right?” she smiled at the nurse.
“Maybe you could engage at least in some form of Christmas cheer, hm?” Marlene gestured at the green adornment above their heads and Chiara couldn’t contain her smirk when she noticed what it was.
Mistletoe.
“Absolutely not,” Ethan stated, his arms crossed at his chest. “We are at work. I will not fuel rumors by indulging in such public display of physical affection.”
Chiara raised an eyebrow at him and Ethan was not sure if she was trying to remind him that the office’s walls were still made out of glass and therefore their earlier escapades could be very well considered a public display of physical affection, had anyone come by, or-
“Ah,” Marlene laughed loudly. “You didn’t mind to fuel those rumors at the gala not even three weeks ago, Dr. Ramsey.”
Ethan’s cheeks flushed brightly but it was clear at the moment that those two women would not let him leave that easily.
Sighing reluctantly, he planted a quick – yet gentle – kiss at Chiara’s cheek and muttering ‘food’ left the corridor.
“What are you doing to the poor man, Dr. Ray,” Marlene whispered as she watched his retreating form, winking at the young redhead she came to like very much.
Third Year
It seemed like it would become their very own tradition, to share their Christmas dinner behind the walls of Ethan’s office.
Chiara was extremely tempted to join her mother and Alicia this year – after all, it is at least warm on Mauritius and Chiara deperately wished to feel warm for a while. But with Leland not that approving of her relationship with Ethan – with her boss, as he reminded them – she wouldn’t dare to ask him for two weeks of vacation.
And maybe she was secretly thankful that he made that decision for her – she missed her family, but she couldn’t imagine sending Ethan beach pictures while he would be working. And she knew he would be working.
It took her by surprise, by the most beautiful surprise, when Ethan asked her if she wouldn’t want to spend New Year’s Eve in San Francisco – there was no doubt they would get three or four days off for that – and that he would accompany her, if she would like that.
Only then she found out he exchanged messages with her mother rather regularly and they came up with the idea together, actually.
And so there she was – walking down the long corridor of renewed Bloom Edenbrook’s hospital, a patient chart in one of her hands and a Christmas card she got from one of the patient in the other. Chiara only needed to drop the charts off at the nurses’s station and she was free to enjoy her take-out with Ethan for as long as their pagers would remain silent.
After checking everything twice and making sure she wasn’t needed anywhere, she stepped into the office, smiling at the sight of a single candle glowing in the middle of Ethan’s desk – maybe the idea of this truly being a Christmas dinner was finally getting on him.
„Before we start,“ Chiara spoke first, taking a seat next to Ethan on a couch. „I saw you leaving a paediatrics wing today and I know you have no patient there. Is that your tradition?“
She normally wouldn’t really care about Ethan being somwhere weird, but this was their third Christmas together and there were many, many attempts on Chiara’s side to get the information out of Ethan through the years, only for him to resist.
And it was beginning to be ridiculous.
„Yes,“ Ethan rolled his eyes but he didn’t really seem anyhow bothered. He hugged Chiara’s waist and put a lingering kiss on her temple, her smell intoxicating him even after years of knowing it. Knowing Chiara.
„So what exactly is it what you do there?“
„I read books to the kids that have to stay here and are alone. I am not dressed as Santa,“ he added quickly, noticing Chiara’s curious eyes. „I just come there, bring some books with me, read them for as long as I can. It’s not much, but...“
Chiara turned to him fully now and whispered: „It is more than much,“ before kissing him softly, pouring all the love she felt into the simple act of their lips meeting eagerly.
And she still wondered, how was it that it was her, that she was the privileged one to see this side of Ethan Ramsey, the side that reads book to sick kids and hugs overwhelmed mothers and buys a candle because he knows his girlfriend loves candles on the Christmas table.
„Didn’t you want to spend this Christmas with Alan?“ Chiara asked between the kisses, genuinely curious – the relationship between two Ramsey men was finally good, after all.
„He knows I will come tomorrow. I wanted to work today.“
„You... wanted to work?“ Chiara leaned back and shot him a confused stare.
She knew that it was Ethan’s habit to work on Christmas Eve, but it never occured to her that it was something he truly wanted.
Ethan leaned into the back of the couch, exhaling slowly before responding.
„I never had anyone waiting for me at home on Christmas. And I made sure, every year, that I would be working on Christmas Eve, because me working meant someone else being able to go home. When I work, it might guarantee another doctor to spend his evening with his family, his kids.“
There was a mix of emotions in Ethan’s eyes, even if his voice was steady – a gentlesness mixed with pain and perhaps even anger.
„I believe that parents should be home for Christmas. I am aware of our job being demanding, but no child should feel left behind because their parents have important job. If there is only one of the fellow doctors that is able to play board games with his kids now because I am here – we are here – working, then yes, I want to work.“
He propped his head on the back and closed his eyes for a while and it stunned Chiara how peaceful he looked, how content. She squeezed his hand, however before she could say anything, Ethan spoke again.
„Until that is something we have, I am more than happy to spend my Christmas Eve’s here with a take-out and you.“
It seemed like he didn’t even realize what he just said, his position, his expression not changed.
But Chiara noticed.
Until that is something we have.
They never really talked about family. Future. They loved each other, there were no doubts about that, and they enjoyed planning the upcoming months of their lives. Chiara knew she wanted to spend her life with Ethan. And deep down she knew that he felt the same – that they didn’t go through that much for him to just let her go.
But the statement left her speechless nonetheless.
It wasn’t even that much about him saying that there might be an option for a family in his future – Ethan changed a lot after all.
It was the way he said, with such easiness, such certainity, without a single doubt, until that is somethig we have.
We. Us.
It was his third Christmas with Chiara and Ethan knew that if it hadn’t been for her, he would still wish to erase Christmas from the existence of an universe.
She thinks of Naveen's offer. Boston is cold, much colder than San Francisco. It's darker and gloomy and rainy and the ocean is not half as beautiful as the one here.
She thinks of her mother and their lunch dates every Wednesday. Of her sister and their coffee breaks in the middle of difficult days. She thinks of all that she has to lose.
She thinks of Peter. Of all she's already lost.
She thinks of Ethan Ramsey, for God's sake. Working that close with him and his famous team would definitely be an experience worth trying. She had seen them in action, after all - she knows it's an opportunity that probably won't keep coming to her.
Still, the gloomy, rainy, stupidly cold Boston is not where she can see herself.
-Mighty Ocean (a force to be reckoned with prologue, ethan x chiara)
I was super dedicated to finish the prologue this week but then I (yet again) spontaneously decided to take a trip over the weekend so hopefully next week it is ❤
