World Changers Issue: The One with Reindeer Running Around and Old Elf Guys Yelling at Them
Folks, I’m obviously a few weeks behind (we haven’t talked about the Tech Issue or the Paris attacks cover, which I thought was a little weak as far as mourning covers go, but what can you do) so let’s just dive in here with the last New Yorker of crazy old 2015 and then we’ll see how things go over the next few weeks catching-up-wise, sound good?
Talk of the Town:
· Wow, Chicago’s cops are messed up! They’ve been fucking around violating people and lying about it for decades. There’s a whole culture of secrecy and non-snitching that is making the police force (and Rahm Emanuel) seem really gross.
· Get this: One of Mr. Trump’s NYC hotels has a luxury hammam service – that’s a fancy way for devout Muslims to be cleansed before praying. The poor hotel employees and his daughter Ivanka seem a little fuzzy on the details of this practice, or even what fucking country it might come from, but it’s pretty exciting to catch this guy raging against Muslims while jumping on an opportunity to make money off of rich Muslims. We also take a tour of his buildings, dumbly named “Trump Place,” many of which are owned by non-American bajillionaires, and employ a large number of Muslims and other tolerant folks who really think he’s a baloney-man.
· First of all, what is the McDowell Colony’s Chairman’s Evening? Has anything good ever been called a “colony” (bees notwithstanding)? Anyway it’s an event at the New Museum where guy-of-the-year Lin-Manuel Miranda performed, and suddenly a piece about L-MM becomes all about Martin Scorsese, who shows up and myopically fixates on the muddy boots he had to wear while filming a new movie about Jesuits in 17th century Japan – man, I can’t wait for this to drop. Nothing better than rolling Japanese countryside, am I right? Also did everyone know L-MM still lives “in the heights” near his entire family so they can get scammed into helping out with his new baby? Also they reminisce about old New York, West Side Story, and compare dueling a century ago to pot today (in the sense that they are both legal-ish).
· There’s a new play that is ostensibly “Shakespearean” about a projected future Charles III accessing to the throne. A Shakespeare scholar sits and criticizes how “Shakespearean” it actually is, in style and content (results: not that Shakespearean). Sounds like there is a lot of wailing about what it means to be king and what has Britain become? It doesn’t sound fun. Also, what kind of person would ever want to be king? Also, what if the US started a tradition of history plays about our presidents (no, Hamilton doesn’t count because it’s too fun and exciting)? Or like election campaign dramas? Do they exist?