So I’ve just finished listening to the If the Bellas Were Fruit episode of the Pitch Slapped Pitch Perfect podacst on Spotify (cuz apparently I listen to an hour and a half long of PP conversations now as soon as I wake up 😂) and can I just say, IT. Was. Freaking. Amazing. First off, I love the cover of Becato by @ridiculously-over-obsessed, you should seriously receive a medal for that, nobody could’ve drawn Beca as a red tomato with her “ear monstrosities” better than you, and I will literally fight anyone who says otherwise with my abundant supply of art supplies and they can suck it 🏅😤🎨. It was the perfect cover for the episode, and the perfect intro to the hour long conversation of what the Bellas would be if they were fruits (which by the way, I can’t even begin to explain my shock and disbelief of it being started out as a 2 am conversation, like what the heck; why are the best and most interesting ideas coming to the best and most interesting people in the middle of the night 😂🌙). I enjoyed every second and every one of the comments and analyzations of which Bella would be which fruit, and was seriously laughing about how you guys said that you are two people who aren’t even that into fruit and are talking about fruit, because to me, it seems like you two can be legit farmers 😂🤠. I was also really intrigued by some of the analyzations out there (like the one with Lily being a coconut and Flo being a lemon) as well as really amused (like the one with Fat Amy being a cucumber and Stacie being an eggplant 👀), and just want to say that it was amazing how people can put so much thought into all the Bellas and their personalities and their matching fruits. I was at first iffy about Beca being a banana, but when I heard about Chloe being a strawberry, I just got right on board because it totally makes sense. Strawberry and banana combinations are the bomb, and with me being a hardcore Bechloe shipper, I absolutely stand by it. Also, I didn’t even know that #Chlotato was a thing, and now my life is all the more complete because of it . 🤧🥔
So thank you @pitchslapped and @ridiculously-over-obsessed for the amazing episode of Pitch Slapped, and I can’t thank you guys enough for seriously just making my day (and it’s only just 10 am 😂).
P.S: Chloe and Stacie having a cherry tongue/teeth twist contest would be insanely entertaining and hot to watch (or read...). 🍒🔥🤭
This… I feel like this isn’t my fault. Also, not beta'd because any mistakes will just add to the utter insanity of this.
The rest of the girls don’t seem to be bothered, but Chloe is certain Beca has a problem with it. She can feel it. Sees it in the way Beca looks at them.
Maybe it’s a lack of understanding. Maybe Beca’s jealous of their love. Whatever the reason, Chloe isn’t about to make an apology. If Beca’s uncomfortable but doesn’t want to talk about it, Chloe can’t do much.
Granted, they’re an unlikely pair, but that’s what Chloe loves about their relationship.
Their meeting was like something ripped from the pages of those trashy romance novels that they sell at grocery stores. Which is to say, they met at the grocery store. Chloe remembers it so clearly.
She’d been perusing the produce aisle when she spotted him and stopped dead, the wheels of the cart she was pushing squealing against the smooth floor. Her heart had started pounding behind her ribs as she stared.
She’s always believed in love at first sight, but she hadn’t experienced it until that day.
She feels so, so lucky to have had Fate lead her to aisle five that day. So happy to have someone who looks at her the same way she looks at them. And he’s such a good listener, though he doesn’t really sing, but Chloe has been able to look past that. He has so many other great qualities, after all.
His dark, handsome complexion being one of them.
They’re sitting together on her bed watching reruns of Full House when Chloe hears a rap at her bedroom door.
“Come in!“ She paused the show and looks up as the door creaks open.
“Hey.” Beca offers up an awkward wave with her greeting, as she glances over at the two of them.
“Hey, Becs.” Chloe smiles brightly as her… “What’s up?”
“Um.” Beca shifts nervously from foot to foot, avoiding eye contact for a few seconds, before shaking her head. “It's… nevermind. You're… busy. I’ll come back later.” Beca turns to leave and Chloe slams the lid of her laptop down, promoting Beca to stall and turn back around.
“What’s your problem?” It’s not entirely argumentative, nor is it solely angry. There’s an edge of sad confusion to Chloe’s voice that gives Beca visible pause.
“My problem?” Beca asks and Chloe feels the short temper of her red-headed ancestors reach towards her through the past.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” This time her question is snappish and irritated.
“How can you not see what you’re doing?” Beca all but shrieks, one hand going to her head, fingers threading into her hair. “Or is this some kind of joke? Because that… that would be great, actually. Then you could just throw him away and we-”
“Beca!” Chloe interrupts. “He’s right here!”
“Chloe! It’s a potato!” Beca barks back and Chloe inhales sharply, hurt. When she speaks, her voice warbles slightly with the threat of tears.
“Don’t talk about John Stamos like that!” Chloe grabs the potato sitting on the pillow beside her with both hands, as though covering his ears.
“John…” Beca huffs a laugh and closes her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose. “John Stamos?”
“Beca, look at him.” Chloe picks up the potato - John Stamos - and holds him out towards Beca. “Tell me you don’t see it.” She watches as Beca spends an intense few seconds staring at him, before flicking her gaze back up to meet Chloe’s.
“The only thing I’m going to tell you,” Beca begins, slowly. “Is that this,” she wags a finger between Chloe and John Stamos, “needs to like… stop being a thing.”
Chloe gasps. The sound is loud and piercing, and she feels her eyes fill with tears.
“Beca…” The name tumbles from Chloe’s lips as a tremulous whisper and Beca takes a step forward, then an immediate and uncertain half-step back, before closing the distance between them.
“Please don’t cry.” Beca looks a little panicked, twisting the fingers of both hands together in front of her body. “I didn't… I didn’t come in here to upset you.”
“Then why did you?” Chloe’s voice is thick as she places John Stamos gently down beside her again, running her finger over the top of his head.
“Look,” Beca sighs, running her fingers through her hair. Chloe looks up at her. “I feel like maybe you’re kind of a little crazy right now and this isn’t the best time to ask, but I don't…” Beca pauses, struggling with something. “I don’t want to completely miss my chance and have to watch you and… John Stamos ride off into the sunset.”
Chloe frowns, her brow creasing and her eyes slatted. Beca takes a breath, folding her arms across her chest.
“Do you like… want to go for dinner some time?” She rocks back on the balls of her feet as she asks, then always forward again, repeating the motion two or three times before adding, “As a date, I mean.”
Chloe’s brow unfurls out of shock and she sits, slack-jawed for a full thirty seconds.
“You’re asking me out?” Chloe blinks at Beca, who gives a resolute nod of her head. “On a date?” Another nod. “In front of John Stamos?” She watches Beca’s eyes roll wildly inside her head and there’s a beat of silence before Beca makes a vague hand gesture.
“I want to like, make my intentions clear and, I don’t know, show him he has competition or whatever.”
Something inside Chloe stirs. Something long buried and previously thought destined to be unfulfilled.
Maybe Beca is jealous, just not in the way Chloe has thought.
“And if you need time to think it over, I’ll wait.”
“No,” Chloe cuts her off and Beca’s face falls. “I mean… I don’t need time.” With one last look towards John Stamos and a whispered apology, Chloe rises from the bed and stands before Beca. “So. Where are you taking me?”
They both smile, as bright as the sun, and Chloe giggles and hugs Beca before grabbing a jacket.
“Oh, you want to- now?” Beca stumbles, confused but trying to roll with it.
“Why not?” Chloe shrugs into her jacket, pulling her hair free from where it catches beneath the collar. Beca doesn’t have an answer.
“What about that place downtown you like? The little corner place with the lights?” Beca asks and Chloe smiles again, nodding, as she grabs Beca’s hand and leads them out of the room. “I hear they serve awesome potato skins.”
“Beca.”
And there on the bed, abandoned and alone, John Stamos falls sideways as the bedroom door slams closed.