Counseling and Forgiveness
1) Forgiveness is sometimes confused with excusing. Excusing is casual and routine, but forgiveness requires sustained effort, usually over a long period of time. 2) Forgiveness is sometimes confused with denial or passive acceptance; forgiveness first involves recognizing and grieving over the damage that has been done then choosing to release the negative emotions associated with the offender. 3) Forgiveness is not self-blame. At times we may share responsibility for the problem, and at other times we may not. 4) Forgiveness is not always associated with remorse and repentance on the part of the offending party. 5) Forgiveness and reconciliation are not the same. Though reconciliation requires forgiveness, forgiveness does not always require reconciliation. - Mark McMinn PTS in CC p.250-1