#cidolphus

[asofterfinalfantasy]

[phantasiiae]

@cidolphus

“You coddle them too much.” It's said without context, without greeting, without much of anything, but Sleipnir knows that Cid will understand what they're getting at. “Especially Genesis. He is already weak. You're not helping him at all.” Though they have a feeling that this isn't simply trying to safeguard these boys from Barnabas and his desires. There must be something deeper going on, something else that Cid has planned. Sleipnir just can't exactly put their finger on what.

“We are meant to be making them stronger, just as His Majesty desires. Just leave it to me, won't you? I don't need you throwing a wrench into this, too.”

[glxciated]

@cidolphus whispered: no one should be judged for loving more than they ought, only for loving not enough.

❅ ⸻ Was that true of her? That she didn't love enough? Or was there some deeper meaning to Cid's words, a way for him to tell her that he knew what, or rather who, lay in her heart of hearts and that perhaps keeping this little piece of herself hidden was, in a way, not allowing herself to love more than she was capable of.

The truth was that she had closed her heart off, locked it up tight and forgotten where she'd put the key. It had been a means of survival, or so she had thought, but the reality was that she should have raged against it, given a war cry so fierce that the men that had put her in chains would tremble at the mere sight of her. But she had not raged and roared, instead she withdrew and shrivelled until she had thought there was nothing left.

❝ And what if I can't love enough? What if those pieces of me have been stripped away so cleanly that there is no way of putting them back? ❞ For a moment her gaze lingers upon the floor before she's shifting it to meet Cid's, brows knitted and a deep sadness tugging at the corners of her mouth. ❝ Is it fair to love someone only half of what they deserve? Or is it a kindness to keep it from them, to let them go through life blissfully unaware of the rot that creeps at their heels? ❞

[phantasiiae]

❛   hush .   raise  a  finger  in  a  gesture  to  silence  my  muse . (cidolphus, for genesis)

Loud & deafening silence || Accepting

Genesis knew they were leaving. He just didn't expect it to be so soon.

There is no moon tonight, which is probably the point. The less light there is the less likely they are to be seen. Genesis' heart pounds in his chest and in his ears, following close behind Cid as they creep out, sticking to the shadows, narrowly evading the guards doing their nightly rounds. As they move along, he can't help but feel guilty for leaving Sephiroth behind, but Sephiroth was tightly guarded. Genesis..not so much, especially since he's been discarded and sentenced to death for things he can't control.

Even still, he asks “Are you sure we can't--?” but is cut off by Cid holding up a finger to silence him, glancing over to where one of the guards paused at the noise. There's a few brief seconds where Genesis swears the guard will come to investigate and they'll be caught, but he just continues on with his rounds.

Genesis lets out a shaky breath, a silent apology hanging in the air as they continue on. No, they can't bring Sephiroth along. It'd be too risky. He knows that. In an ideal world, maybe, but…the world isn't ideal.

If he gets strong enough, maybe he'll come back for Sephiroth one day, but he would have to ponder that once they were free.

@cidolphus

[phantasiiae]

❛   gouge .   wield  a  sharp  object  at  my  muse . ( cidolphus, for sleipnir )

Loud & deafening silence || Accepting

Sleipnir looks down at the sword that's currently pressed against their chest, and they snort, amusement crossing their features. “Oh, Cidolfus, do you really think that's going to do anything to me?” they practically coo, their eyes narrowing. “You know better, don't you? And what would his majesty say if he caught you threatening me? Certainly nothing good.” Even still, they don't move, wanting to see how far he's willing to take this. They've never gotten along, at each other's throats from day one. Sleipnir has never understood what Barnabas sees in Cid. It's the only thing they've ever questioned him on. 

So they sigh rather dramatically, clicking their tongue. “If you're going to do it, then do it, but you know it won't stick. I have to say that I'm impressed with the lengths you'll go to to protect those boys, but what will happen if you're no longer around, I wonder?” A thinly veiled threat, a sharp grin. “You have much to consider, don't you?”

@cidolphus

[audaciiaearchive]

@cidolphus

"Awfully bold of you to show your face around here again, don't you think?"

Barnabas' voice cuts through the silence quite starkly, and there he stands, staring at Cid with a look of a thousand daggers. He shouldn't be surprised, really. There was a number of reasons why Cid was his Lord Commander to begin with, his boldness being one of them. Seems it's come around to bite him in the ass, though.

"Sneaking around was never your strong suit," he says as he steps closer to him, clicking his tongue. "But this is reckless, even for you. Now tell me, what brings you back? It couldn't possibly be for old time's sake, I'm sure."