@cinisemperium continued from here
The jinchuriki stays quiet, processing the Uchiha’s words before finally uttering a “no.”
Ocean blue eyes gleam with waves of guilt, the blonde staring at his bandaged limb. He flexes it, watching the fingers curl and uncurl as his own phantom pains make their grisly appearance. It’s an ache that reminds him of everything that happened, what they had done.
What he had done.
Naruto grit his teeth. He hated this. He hated having moments like this. He hated remembering. He hated the knots that twisted in his gut everytime the light blue of the chidori flashed before his eyes. How the mere sound of birds chirping would have his heart skipping a beat as tendrils of panic threatened to grip at his chest. The shame that bubbled within him for pestering Sakura whenever the pain got too bad. The looks of worry and pitty of his friends whenever he spaced out at the when he was reminded of it all.
He hated the guilt that would course threw him whenever he used the rasengan, the brief moment where he could see it cut through Sasuke’s flesh before the two combining forces blinded them.
A sharp inhale brought his wandering mind back to reality. Naruto closed his eyes, holding his trembling fist close to his lap to try and hide them from the Uchiha beside him. It was just all too much sometimes.
If anything… it was moments like these he felt scared of his old friend. He hated it. He despised himself for the chill that went down his spine whenever he remembered the raven’s expression when he impaled him. He could still remember the burning sensation as his hand cut through him-
A strangled whimper. He could barely see anything. No no no, not now, you can’t let him see you cry now. Naruto tried to reel himself in, taking a deep breath. But the tears wouldn’t go away; they threatened to roll down his whiskered cheeks, the ache in his arm, and now the area between the left shoulder and his chest became too much.
“I didn’t want it all to go that far,” He force out, hoping that his efforts to keep the tremble out of his voice weren’t in vein. “I didn’t want to hurt you, I just wanted you to stop.” Stop the pain, stop the misery, stop the fighting. Naruto just wanted to hold the raven and never let go, take his pain away from him, let him know that he wasn’t alone.
“Each fight, I was hoping you’d come to your senses,” He choked out. “But you never did, and it felt like the only way to get you back was to agree to fight you again…” It hurt. Why did it still hurt?
“Everyone told me to stop, but I couldn’t. The thought of losing you was more painful than the physical pain you put me through…”
