I dunno? I don’t lie that often tbh, oh I’ll tell a story because it involves lying and kids being kids. So me and my cousin when we were about 10 wanted strawberries so in true Norwegian go stealing edible things from other people’s gardens, we decided to do the same. Except not from a garden, but a Strawberry field right by her house. So we went ate tons of strawberries, got red fingertips and such and to hide the fact that we had quite literally stolen loads of strawberries from the neighbour we stopped by a tree with other red non-edible berries and had a play-fight throwing the berries around at each other and such (and as her mum could see the tree from the house we actually did pretend to have a pretend fight) so we wouldn’t get in trouble.
150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?
Han hadde fått nye tenner av Sverige, men var likevel snillere i Finland/He had gotten new teeth from Sweden, but despite that he was nicer in Finland.
- Ingenbarnsland/No child land* by Eija Hetekivi Olsson
*That’s probably the worst translation of that title in existence.
Summary: Five times Kimi and Seb tried to kiss in front of the cameras, and the one time they made it happen.
The prompt was: Seb and Kimi coming out together and kissing on live TV during a podium celebration.
1: Quali
“You sure you want to retire, Kimi?” Sebastian asked Kimi, both posing for the top three photograph.
“You know my answer, Wunderkind,” Kimi answered.
“I’ll miss having you around,” Sebastian said a bit too loud, but it didn’t seem to catch the attention of the cameras.
“I know,” Kimi smiled, pulling Sebastian even tighter to his side.
“Now comerce plan A for Amore” Sebastian grinned, to Kimi’s imerce enjoyment. Even if the Finn wouldn’t say it out loud, least of all to the man in question. The German’s ego was big enough as it was. They didn’t have time to continue their conversation as they were ushered to the weigh-ins and then straight to the press conference. They both paused as they walked into the room, with a final smile they bent closer so they could kiss, making the entire room fall silent, before the noise started up again almost as quickly, like nothing had happened. Both men prepared for the questions they would be asked from the floor.
“So Kimi how does it feel to take pole in your last race? Any regrets?” The journalist asked, to Kimi and Sebastian’s utter surprise.
“Regrets?” Kimi said, not sure what the journalist was on about, but not really caring much either. His career would be over in 24 hours and Ferrari’s PR team couldn’t coach him any more, not that it had worked before.
“About retiring? Or if you’d like more general do you regret any part of your career?” The journalist asked.
“No,” Kimi answered, deciding to go out the same way as he had always been in the press conferences, even if apparently the entire room had decided to ignore that two of the drivers had kissed moments before.
2: Interviews
“So Kimi, any plans for your retirement?” A journalist asked, notebook in hand.
“Spending time at home, beating Sebastian at badminton, marry him,” Kimi answered in his monotone voice, to the laughter of everyone who heard his answer. Kimi looked towards his Britta for permission to leave the interviews, she looked up with a smile.
“That’s it for today, Kimi has a race to prepare for,” she raised voice to tell them all, giving Kimi an opportunity to leave the area and go back to his hotel.
********
“Sebastian, I forgot to ask you something,” Kimi said when the younger man walked into the hotel room.
“What?” Sebastian answered, slightly worried.
“I told a journalist something, which will definitively come out at some point, so I should probably just ask you now,” Kimi explained.
“What did you say?” Sebastian asked, his worry getting stronger and stronger.
“So I had this thing planned out, I’d let you win at badminton and then when you were done celebrating I would get down on one knee and everything and say In my heart you are always a winner, I want to stay with you forever or something I hadn’t really figured that part out just yet, but the part I am sure of is this one,” Kimi rambled, looking down and fidgeting with a small box in his hands. Sebastian was staring at the older man, not sure where Kimi was going with this. “So bottom line is, will you marry me Sebastian Vettel?” Kimi asked, his voice going soft.
“… Kimi,” Sebastian started in wonder, getting down on his knees so he’d be on Kimi’s level. “Yes,” he smiled before he was ambushed by Kimi.
Hours later, Kimi looked on the floor to find the box so he could put the simple ring on Sebastian’s finger.
3: Ted’s Quali Notebook
“Kimi, look at me,” Sebastian shouted, running up to Kimi, making the Finn turn around to face Seb. “You know the thing we’ve been discussing,” he whispered in Kimi’s ear, bending close to the Finn.
“Yes.”
“Ted is over there,” Sebastian nodded towards the journalist, with a knowing smile.
Instead of answering Kimi bent down so he could kiss Sebastian, it was over in a moment and when they looked up Ted had already ended his segment and the cameras where off. Ted looked straight at them, he almost ran up to them.
“You two should be more careful, but don’t worry, we didn’t film any of it,” Ted told them, looking like he had done the two racing drivers a huge favour.
“So when I told you in the interviews yesterday that I clearly intend to spend a lot of time with Sebastian, that didn’t reach you?” Kimi asked, looking confused.
“What? That you would beat him at badminton, we all know that,” Ted answered in confusion.
“No,” Kimi answered, giving Sebastian a look, making them both turn around and walk away. Ted noticed a slight glimmer on Sebastian’s finger that he’d never seen before, maybe the German had figured out medallions in his shoe was impractical and instead had the metal melted and put on his finger?
4: Before the race
“Kimi, tell us about your emotions, now right before your last ever Formula one race,” DC asked.
“It’s normal,” Kimi answered, looking around to see where Mark and his equipment was.
“You must be feeling something,” David asked.
“No,” Kimi replied, seeing no need to change his behaviour in the media now that their relationship was thankfully ending.
As Kimi kept looking around to find Mark he noticed Sebastian who was doing an uncharacteristic move and walking away from his own Ferrari and towards Kimi’s. DC noticed, and remembering how Ted had threatened him with some very embarrassing photos that still hadn’t gotten out in the media, he quickly ended the interview and looked around to see if he could find anyone to distract them. Noticing Esteban, he jogged towards him, camera crew behind. “Hi Esteban! How are your feelings about today’s race?” He asked the moment he reached them. The driver realized what David was doing and he smiled before he started what would go down in record as the longest grid interview, ever. During his interview Esteban was confused as to why Kimi and Sebastian were looking slightly annoyed. They had saved the two drivers, yet again, from outing themselves to the whole world.
5: After the podium
“Kimi, I’m so proud of you!” Sebastian smiled when Kimi walked out of the press conference. “How can you retire now, you won!”
“You know why, Sebastian,” Kimi answered, stepping closer to the younger man so he could put some of his weight on him. His back had never healed completely and the pain was no longer worth it, he was done racing.
“Oh, I do, I’ll miss you,” Sebastian answered, placing a kiss on Kimi’s cheek, making a journalist suddenly turn around facing the rest of the people who had been in the press conference.
“So this eagle walks into a bar..” the journalist started, trying his best to distract them all from the display Kimi and Sebastian were showing just around the corner, also wishing her mum had worked her harder on the wanting to become a stand up comedian thing, because she had no idea how this joke would end.
+1 - Sebastian’s last race
Sebastian was happy, he had won another race, and Kimi had been there to witness it, which made it even better. Smiling at Esteban, he took a final sip of his water before preparing to get on the podium, which reminded him… “Does anyone know who is doing the interviews today?” Sebastian asked, looking around, everyone shaking their heads. Seb hoped it would be DC, it was always fun when he was on the podium with them. Smiling at Esteban, they all walked towards the podium to go out when their names were called. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, but was less than a minute, Sebastian heard his own name. Running out to face his fans, he looked down at the crowd trying to find Kimi, but it was impossible to make out any faces, except Maurizio who was looking up with pride. Both his drivers had gotten on the podium, today was a good day for Ferrari. Sebastian could also make out Britta’s face. She looked just as happy as she always did but she seemed to be distracted, like she was just going through the motions. Sebastian couldn’t dwell much on that right now, he had a win to celebrate!
“And today’s podium interviews will be held by none other than our very own Kimi Räikkönen, give him a warm welcome!” They announced, making Sebastian pinch himself, did he really say Kimi? Why would Kimi voluntarily get on a podium to talk to people on purpose?
“Sebastian you won, how does that feel?” Kimi asked in an eerie reminder of DC’s questions to the Finn when he had gotten his first win back from his break in Formula 1. Sebastian still remembered Kimi’s answer and if the Finn wanted to play it like that Seb would always be there to play with.
“Not much,” Sebastian answered, mimicking Kimi’s voice, making the crowd laugh.
“Tell us, the people want to know,” Kimi continued, now grinning, making Sebastian realize they had a chance they had missed when Kimi was on the podium in his last race.
“Oh you know, slightly surprised that you didn’t tell me you would do the interviews this morning,” Sebastian answered, pouting for half a second before his grin broke through. He couldn’t believe Kimi would ever do this for him.
“You are very distracting,” Kimi stated.
“I’m distracting? I was busy preparing for a race,” Sebastian answered, letting the familiarity of their bickering calm him, even if it was happening in front of millions of people instead of Kimi’s dogs.
“Anything I can do to make it up to you?” Kimi asked, tilting his head.
“Kiss me,” Sebastian answered, and with those words it seemed like the entire world had stopped, everything went completely silent. Kimi curled his fingers around Sebastian’s chin, just like he had done a thousand times before, moving closer to Sebastian and kissing him.
