I would apologize for the like spam, but I just got to finish season 3 tonight and had to bask in the posts I missed while I'm still rolling in feels. Also, re: "this is the moment he Knew": you can't just die on that hill without elaborating on your meta! (While I don't disagree with you, I love your analysis work) ^_^
THANK YOU! i actually have wanted to write about why I chose this moment as the one I think it hit Callum, because it’s small and I missed it the first time around, but well — time to talk about it :D I’ve been wanting to talk about Callum’s romantic development since S3 came out, since it definitely deserves an update from the last time I talked about it, but a lot of what I said about S2 still stands.
2x03 and this look specifically is the end of his feelings for Claudia. Not only did she lie to him and try to kidnap him, she didn’t stop even when he was begging for her to (whereas earlier Rayla was pleading with him, and still listened when he told her to stop). He knows that rather than just trying to protect him, Claudia partially lied about Harrow to try and get him to come home (whether that’s true or not is another matter, but I can certainly see Callum perceiving it that way). It also throws into question whether anything she felt or expressed on their date was true or not, and how much she was using his feelings. So yeah, this?
This is the end of his feelings for Claudia. Which also opens the gateway for furthering feelings for Rayla in 2x04 and 2x07, and I think they definitely did. Rayla stuck by him even when he doubted her, helped him mourn his father, and has been a better friend to him than his two closest friends from childhood. She hears him out and reaffirms his self worth in 2x04 and then oh man, 2x07.
2x07 is important because it makes Callum confront what he’s willing to do to keep her safe (which is risk his life and bend his morals to do Dark Magic) in addition to what it would feel like to lose her. As I’m sure you know, I’ve written a lot on this topic so I won’t go into too much detail here, but it is a massive deal. Callum realizes how much his words can affect her (“Who told you that?” “You did”) and then watches her go away to what they both know might be her death: “If I don’t come back...”
The drawing scene also foreshadows that his feelings for her are starting to lean more towards romantic, but I don’t think it’s hit him yet. And that’s where 3x01 comes in. It’s their first day in Xadia, so it’s only been a couple of days since 2x07 (maybe three?) at the absolute most. Callum and Rayla have to navigate getting around Sol Regem, and I think the end of the ep is when it hits Callum that he has feelings for her.
And here’s why. First off, he was already blushing in 3x02, so I felt like it had to come before then, because I think he’s fully aware of his feelings and the depth of them by 3x04 (hence fumbling through the post kiss scene) and 3x05.
The second is what this moment means in the context of 3x01 in the first place. They’ve had to rely quite seriously on each other in a very dangerous situation and problem solve on their own, and do so successfully. Callum is coming off the waves of Rayla gushing about him to Sol Regem (which is almost a confession in its own right, tbh) and has probably never heard himself praised so highly in his life, let alone by someone he admires as much as he admires Rayla.
Then, when Callum thinks him dying is the only way to get them through to Xadia, Rayla doesn’t consider it, and although she treats the matter rather lightly, what she’s actually saying is “I’d rather die trying to keep us alive and together than to just let you die.” Then she risks her life for him by luring Sol Regem away and wearing his scarf. Callum is once again confronted by the fear of losing her.
C: This is the worst idea you’ve ever had. He’s going to burn you to a crisp.
He’s so distracted by her being distraught he starts walking out towards her, completely forgetting that Sol Regem is even there. But she lives, largely thanks to his magic and their communication. He’s thrilled that she’s okay and thinks she was amazing, and tells her so.
C: That was amazing! Too close, but amazing!
Rayla tells him to relax (but in good nature) and then says, “I’m only slightly singed,” and his face changes.
He’s still happy, but there’s something else, too. Like wow this incredible girl who I think might be my best friend too almost died but she’s here and okay even if it was a close call which is good because I don’t know what I’d do without her either and - oh my gosh, I think I have feelings for her.
And it doesn’t scare him, because it’s Rayla, but it is a change and I think he realizes he loves her in 3x03, with how angry he gets on her behalf. I think the idea of someone not loving / cherishing Rayla to their fullest capacity, especially when it’s someone she cares about, would be one of the things that gets his temper going, and I could see him floundering to himself in those moments at the Silvergrove: “How could anyone turn their backs on her? How could anyone not love Rayla, she — oh. I love Rayla.”
Because by 3x04 and 3x05, he not only accepts, but savours the feeling of being in love with her.
And it’s beautiful to behold.
