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@drferox
There was a Sticky Gecko in a party bag, and now my morning has turned into that of Chilli Heeler.
It’s been stuck on the roof repeatedly, because Darling Child saw it in a Bluey episode and decided she was onto a good thing. Usually it cones down in a minute or two but it’s been a solid 20 minutes now.
And Trash Bag would very much like to be the one to catch it.
The prize in question
There was a Sticky Gecko in a party bag, and now my morning has turned into that of Chilli Heeler.
It’s been stuck on the roof repeatedly, because Darling Child saw it in a Bluey episode and decided she was onto a good thing. Usually it cones down in a minute or two but it’s been a solid 20 minutes now.
And Trash Bag would very much like to be the one to catch it.
Finally, I get a chance to settle down with The Book!
Hmmm
Today I will Speculatively Evolve a humble swine
👆(clueless)
Here then is our pig. Representative of a population of hogs released in a nice temperate area on the warmer side, pesky humans nowhere in sight.
Of course the first thing these pigs will do is get bigger. Stands to reason. And if you’re the toughest, most adaptable ungulate in a landscape cleared of most ungulates, why not take advantage of that?
With great size comes great reposeability. It’s gonna need meatier legs than that to support it. I’m thinking its feet will form big cushiony pads to hold its weight.
Another problem is overheating. I don’t think just being hairless is enough. So since they’re in a pretty warm place, why not give them big fan-like ears? Ears work great to diffuse excess body heat, so let’s give them those.
But I’m just adding things on, really. What are some things pigs already have? Oh, I know! Tusks! Pigs use their tusks for defense. At this size they would still be used for fighting, but now can fill a lot of roles, like digging or bark stripping. Why not have females be attracted to bigger tusks too? These giant pigs could have really big tusks for display!
What’s something else pigs have? Snouts! That amazing, sensitive nasal disc! A really big pig could use an even more sensitive snout to pick up things. Let’s make it really long so it can reach things on the ground, freeing up the need for a long neck and allowing the head to get as big and heavy as it needs. And let’s make the tip really sensitive, give it “fingers” to manipulate things. Pigs are smart, surely they would get even smarter with a dexterous appendage!
… hmm why does this look oddly familiar. This can’t be right.
‘Temporary’ Names
Vet clinics often have litters of kittens to raise. Either they’re too young for a shelter, too sickly, or the clinic intends to adopt them out when they’re big enough. Whatever the reason, nurses often end up raising kittens and giving them ‘temporary’ names.
The intention of these temporary names is that if you give the kitten a stupid name, you have something to call it other than ‘the middle black male’, but because it’s a stupid name you wont get emotionally attached and end up keeping it. Again.
Which is how some nurses end up with cats that have names like ‘Flea bus’ and ‘Trash bag’.
Folks, I succumbed.
I ended up keeping Trash Bag.
He’s growing fast.
And getting into trouble
Happy post number 2500!
Tell Trashbag I love him
We love you Trashbag
Trash Bag chose Charmander.
Trash Bag is a deeply cherished little gremlin who eats cardboard when he’s angry at me (because Breakfast Was Late)
So in today’s parenting adventures I first need you to understand that I’m a kind of agnostic atheist where I don’t mind religion on the periphery but do not practice it, though we still do santa and the easter bunny and any other fun event the kid gets an invite to.
And while I fully intended to teach the kiddo what religion is, I never intended a religious up bringing, and in particular had been avoiding the Christian-heavy stuff that would occasionally come knocking at the door.
But tonight, kiddo asked a very clever question about how the ammonite fossils in her favourite rock could be older than dinosaurs. So I started explaining about the Big Bang, creation of planets etc.
“But that’s wrong,” she said.
And then proceeded to tell me the Rainbow Serpent Dreamtime story of the Bunurong People (she specified) with reasonable accuracy though a lot more frogs than I remember.
So Baby’s First Religion ends up being very, very Australian. And I don’t mind it, actually.
it's really important to have The Talk before engaging in any sort of intimacy:
Every time I contemplate this pairing I’m struck by how absolutely mind blowing it must be for the spider to even be able to consider sex without death.
He doesn’t need the ‘willing to die for her(his one and only mate)’ devotion. He doesn’t need to surrender his will and autonomy. He can actually consider his own feelings and desire without assumed death.
And gee, that feels like an allegory for something.
my fanart for markiplier's iron lung! i was blown away by this movie and its immediately become a favorite of mine!
So Darling Child is going through a My Little Pony phase, specifically Friendship is Magic, and like any small child they are drawing what they are obsessed with.
It’s interesting to see their changing understanding of perspective, style and detail… but this is resulting in drawings that are both full of character and mildly haunted.
So I present to you:
1. Black Eyes
Black eyes is a pretty decent unicorn pony, with a very stylish cutie mark, though that horn isn’t quite in a traditional location. However it’s the eyes that I find most distinctive. Clearly an attempt has been made to give them a highlight but the result is a ‘unicorn’ worn black sclera.
2. Miss Eyelashes
Miss Eyelashes is a more traditional unicorn, with an attempt at a prancing pose, but the extra detailed lower eyelashes are just unnerving. She does look like she desperately wants to be friends though.
3. Human Cutie Mark
Our third exhibit has a human cutie mark. This is far too thought provoking. Apparently the cutie mark’s name is Sam, and he has a hat because he’s a magician.
Which pony is your favourite?
Black Eyes
Miss Eyelashes
Human Cutie Mark
You know, I don’t really get a lot of clinical exposure to pepper spray in Australia, only encountered it on a dog once, but it is handy to know how our human counterparts recommend decontaminating it.
Incomprehensible eldritch cryptid? Nah.
Terrestrial Cretaceous cephalopod? Maybe.
Today
Today is the birthday of a suicide victim. Missed, and not forgotten.
what does a three year old want as a gift. I need to outdo everyone else in my family and be the coolest relative and give this kid a permanent flashbulb memory so that when I’m old I have someone to sneak me clamato ceasers in the nursing home. a lot depends on this. he likes garbage cans and trains
Something that lights up and makes noise. You are attempting to befriend the child, not the parents.
It recently came up that, while Beatrix Potter stories are often characterized as cute and "cottagecore" (whatever that word means these days), they are often driven by a plot of, well, avoiding getting eaten. And the bad guys can be pretty nasty characters.
So in the spirit of that...
Who is the greatest, nastiest, vilest, scariest, most evil villain in a Beatrix Potter story?
Mr. McGregor (Peter Rabbit, Benjamin Bunny, Flopsy Bunnies)
Old Brown (Squirrel Nutkin)
The Trout (Jeremy Fisher)
The Foxy Gentleman (Jemima Puddle-Duck)
Samuel Whiskers and Anna Maria (Samuel Whiskers)
Tommy Brock (Mr. Tod)
Mr. Tod (Mr. Tod)
The Cat (Johnny Town-Mouse)
The Ship's Cook (Little Pig Robinson)
Left out the characters that are just jerks, evidently. Propaganda in case you need it:
Mr. McGregor: old farmer. Likes to catch rabbits and cook them. Is foiled repeatedly. The most recurring villain of the books.
Old Brown: tawny owl who is placated by squirrels with multiple offerings of food. Tries to eat Squirrel Nutkin (to be fair, Nutkin was asking for it) but ends up tearing off his tail instead.
The Trout: apparently a regular big fish with no signs of higher intelligence. Almost eats Jeremy Fisher. Doesn't like the taste of rubber boots.
The Foxy Gentleman: seduces and almost eats Jemima Puddle-Duck.
Samuel Whiskers and Anna Maria: two rats that dwell in liminal spaces. Roll a kitten into a pudding and almost eat him.
Tommy Brock: badger. Gains Bouncer Bunny's trust only to stuff the rabbit's grandkids into a bag and abduct them to cook and eat later. Would have gotten away with it too, were it not for...
Mr. Tod: fox. Gets in a fight with Tommy Brock, during which Peter and Benjamin save the baby rabbits.
The Cat: regular cat, no sign of intelligence. Tries to eat our heroes.
The Ship's Cook: entices Little Pig Robinson onto a boat in order to fatten and cook him later (our hero escapes).
That's a lotta characters who want to eat other characters O_o
Sometimes I’m amused at how different my kiddo is from me. Today’s example is that she really likes horses, specifically the scene from Frozen 2 where the water horse is trying to murder Elsa.
Kiddo is 4 years old, and as such there is no punctuation that can adequately convey their dynamic vocal range, and so emojis will have to do.
For those unfamiliar with Frozen 2, Elsa (with her ice powers) attempts to cross the sea, in which lurks Nokk, the water horse. It’s a very thematic and scary scene, but the horse never actually gets named in the movie.
“Elsa’s horse name Posy ☺️☺️☺️❤️❤️❤️” my child explains.
“Posy 😀” my darling murmurs happily as the water horse appears, charging from the inky depths.
“POSEY!😃😃🥳🤩🤩!” Delighted squeals reverberate through my house, as a volume usually only reserved for the Wiggles, while the water horse actively tries to murder what is apparently the second favourite character in this movie.
“Aw, Posy… 😕😞😔” and a resigned sigh as the water horse is frozen and Elsa escapes.
“I told you Posy was good.” 😌
Another year older, and kiddo has written a letter to Santa.
Do you know what she would like this year?
A Nightmare Moon toy, from My Little Pony.
Not Princess Luna, just Nightmare Moon.
Yet another Danger Horse. It’s very on brand.
I am hormonal and clucky, so here are the most entertaining things that my brain has decided are “Baby!” and felt compelled to adopt.
1. Us from Baulders Gate 3
It’s tiny and has a small voice and wiggles cutely and was literally born that day. Us is a baby and must be protected. No, I have not played much of the game.
2. Telescope fish
It is adorable and doing its best. It looks like a muppet that escaped from a goblin king’s labyrinth and needs a blanket and a hug. Sweet baby needs to be cared for.
Not pictured but still ‘Baby!’: every cat on the planet
My favourite picture book to have come out of the Magnus Archives for Halloween…
