what if, and hear me out, Wanda just loves getting you a little extra high because she knows how good it feels and you have less of a tolerance than she does still
and she also knows how horny it gets you so of course she takes advantage of that when she can! And she knows your hands will be all over her and you’d whine for more of her and all she’d do is tease you about it because why can’t her sweet girl just use her words? but your brain is fuzzy from all the weed and you can’t seem to explain to Wanda what you want so you’re just huffin and whining and Wanda is still teasing you about it, her fingers dancing over your skin, spreading goosebumps in their wake and maybe she’s planting soft kisses on your face and jaw and neck and leaving marks wherever she can because why not? And you’re climbing in her lap to get a better grip on her and she smells amazing and she’s warm and you sigh a little too dramatically but you barely notice because you’re so floaty and you also barely notice that you’re all but getting off on her leg, grinding against her thigh until she grips your hips and scolds you for being so naughty and she’s handing you your pen for another hit and she giggles as your eyes close and you almost fall back onto the bed until she’s holding your waist again and giving you more soft kisses and her fingers are dipping under your shirt and teasing your tummy and the waistband of your skirt and yeah idk where this came from I just miss stoner!wanda 🥲
HI BESTIE!!! Could you.. make me.. a stoner!Wanda moodboard.. with uhhhmm maybe they’re just having a cozy day at home together? Domesticy stoner Wanda 🥹
did you read my mind? I love stoner!wanda soooo much bestie!!!! check out my cloud 9 au!!
I lurve this saur much but I don't get the Shotgun thing!!!
Okay so @didntalwayslookthisrough suggested I share a gif and this is kind of it but basically like Wanda would take the hit and then share it with you?
Summary: This is a well overdue birthday fic for my favorite girl @didntalwayslookthisrough 💕 Thank you for always being so patient with me 🥺
Characters: stoner!wanda x reader
Word Count: 2.5k
Warnings: nipple play, oral (r and w receiving), kissing, marijuana use, mommy kink, if I forgot any please let me know!)
cloud 9 au || masterlist
“Spend the weekend with me,” Wanda whined.
“Baby my family wants me around for my birthday!” You whined back.
“But… what if… I want you for your birthday?” Wanda asked, taking your face into her hands and kissing your cheeks between every word.
“Okay, okay!” You said laughing and leaning into her for a real kiss.
——
You had told Wanda you didn’t want a party and that you just wanted to spend your birthday with your favorite girl. She of course teased you until you told her outright that she was in fact your favorite. You knew she’d still go overboard with cake and presents and when you arrived at her house there was indeed a tall pile of gifts.
“Wands! I told you that this wasn’t necessary!” You whined.
“Hmm but I think it is! You only celebrate your 19th birthday once! C’mon baby, let me treat you!” Wanda pleaded. “Besides, each bag or box has only one thing in it so it’s more fun!” Wanda beamed a large smile at you and you chuckled. Pressing a kiss to her forehead and nodding, she squealed as she led you over to the pile of presents.
“Okay sooo! This one first!” She exclaimed, pulling a small box out of the pile of presents. You started to unwrap the box slowly, trying not to rip the paper but Wanda groaned.
“Baby I’ll be watching you turn twenty by the time you’re finished if you unwrap everything like that!” She whined. You laughed at her and shook your head.
“Fine! But that’s so wasteful!”
“You’re cute but please unwrap it quickly, we’ve got eighteen more to go!!” Wanda teased.
“Okay okay,” you laughed and tore off the paper, revealing your very own wax pen, similar to Wanda’s black one, only this one was red. “Wanda-“
“I hope it’s okay… I wasn’t sure about the color-“
You lunged forward and planted a kiss on her lips, effectively shutting her up. “It’s perfect!!! And now I don’t have to mooch off of yours all the time!” You laughed and watched Wanda giggle too. The rest of the presents flew by quickly, anywhere from graphic tees to scrunchies, new DVDs for your collection, and even a pair of baseball game tickets.
“Wanda… this… you’re incredible,” you said quietly with tears pricking your eyes. Previous relationships never really gave a damn about your birthday and you were feeling grateful and overwhelmed all at once. “I love you.”
“I love you too, pretty girl. You deserve this,” she said softly, leaning in for a kiss which you happily granted her. “However, that was only eighteen presents. You’ve got one more, love.”
“Wanda, I’m out of bags and boxes,” you said, furrowing your eyebrows, sifting through the empty wrapping paper mess on the floor.
“I know. This one is upstairs in my room,” she said with a mischievous glint in her eye. She stood up and then helped you stand, taking your hand and leading you up the grand staircase to her bedroom.
“Sit back on the bed for me?” She asked sweetly.
You nodded in response and sat up against the headboard, watching as she peeled off her shorts to reveal pretty, red lace panties underneath. “Wanda-“
Your attempt to speak was quickly cut off as your girlfriend straddled your lap, the heat between her legs evident as she looked down into your eyes. “Your last present is me,” Wanda rasped in your ear as she held onto the headboard behind you.
“Fuck-“ you whispered.
“Don’t worry baby, we will. But first, maybe unwrap Mommy?” Wanda cooed, biting her lip as she looked back into your eyes.
“Y-yeah yes okay,” you stumbled, feeling yourself grow wet at the use of the title, something she doesn’t normally pull until you’ve lost focus and attention but this, this was different. Your hands were shaky as you reached for the hem of her shirt, pulling it over her head as she raised her arms to help.
All you could do was gasp. You’d seen your girlfriend's breasts more times than you could count but now you were face to face with them and Wanda had gotten her nipples pierced. Small silver bars decorated her erect buds and you couldn’t believe your eyes. “W-Wanda I- y-you- wow,” you couldn’t form a full sentence and watched as Wanda took her breasts in her hands and squeezed them.
“Do you like them?” She asked, humming in pleasure as she touched herself. You couldn’t believe your eyes as you watched Wanda tease herself in your lap.
“I love them,” you whispered. Your hands reached up for her breasts and she swatted them away.
“I don’t remember my pretty girl asking for permission to touch,” Wanda husked.
“P-please, please, please I’ll do anything-“
“Anything, huh?” Wanda mocked. You nodded quickly, not moving your eyes from the sparkling bars adorning her rosy nipples. Wanda chuckled at you and tilted your head up by your chin, forcing you to meet her eyes with yours.
“Want your mouth, baby,” Wanda whispered, leaning in to press a kiss to your lips, holding your chin to make sure she’s still in control. You nodded the best you could and she let go, allowing you to be face to face with her breasts again.
You looked up at Wanda briefly and she nodded, giving you the okay. She leaned forward ever so slightly, brushing her nipple across your lips, inviting you to open your mouth. Your tongue darted out, flicking across the newly sensitive bud. Wanda bit her lip and continued to watch as you found your footing with the new feeling in your mouth. The bar gave a new, metallic taste but it seemed Wanda was far more sensitive now than she was before. You closed your mouth around one of her nipples and began to suck, a deep moan erupting from her throat at your actions.
You made eye contact with Wanda as you continued to suck, deepening the pull of her nipple into your mouth and occasionally flicking your tongue over the ball at the end of her piercing. “Fuck, baby,” Wanda moaned. You let go of her nipple with a pop, and moved to the other, flicking over the bud and piercing quickly. Wanda’s breath was quickening and you could almost hear her loud heartbeat. Your mouth fully encompassed her nipple and you watched her face as you sucked diligently on the sensitive bud. Wanda gasped loudly when she felt your teeth bite down ever so slightly, taken aback by the sensation but loving the little bit of pain.
“This might’ve been my best decision yet,” Wanda said quietly. You let go of her nipple and nodded.
“I have to agree,” you said chuckling.
“I do recall saying that it was time to unwrap me, though. And by the looks of my panties still being on, you’ve done a poor job, pretty girl,” Wanda teased. She reached over for her pen on the side table and took a few hits, handing it to you as well.
“I suppose I have…” You said, biting your lip. You flipped her onto her back and spread her legs quickly, admiring the dark wet patch that had formed onto the lace between her legs. Wanda gasped and you just smirked, taking a few hits from her pen. You placed it back in its spot and then raked your nails down Wanda’s inner thighs. She’s usually the one who gets to tease you, and quite frankly you knew she might get you back for it later, but this was your present and you were to be damned if you weren’t going to take your time opening it.
“Babyyy-“
You shook your head no, tracing the hem of her panties between her legs. You ran your fingers over the lace at the top of her panties, listening to her breathing pick up as you moved. Your index and middle fingers slid down between her legs, rubbing ever so gently at the wet spot that had formed. Wanda gasped, finally feeling you where she wanted most, but it didn’t last long. You hovered over her, each hand leaning on the bed on either side of her body for support as you leaned down and took her right nipple in your mouth once more. Wanda gasped, your lips sucking gently this time, flicking your tongue against her piercing again, listening as she moaned quietly. You repeated everything in the same way to her left nipple, making eye contact as you teased the bar.
“Please, baby girl,” Wanda whined.
“Please what, Mommy?” You asked, batting your eyelashes down at Wanda. You lifted one hand and began teasing the top of her panties, pulling them down just slightly. “So pretty,” you whispered.
Slowly, you pulled Wanda’s pretty red lace panties down her legs and she spread herself open for you, waiting ever so patiently. Your nails ran up and down her legs again, teasing her ever so slightly. “You’re so wet,” you whispered, your fingers sliding over Wanda’s folds and listening to her whimpers.
“Babyyy, c’mon put that pretty mouth to good use, yeah?” Wanda all but begged.
“Patience,” You replied, smiling at her. You repositioned yourself and began kissing down her thighs, her skin soft as you left a few love bites in the process. The heat radiating from Wanda’s pussy was evident as she waited for your mouth; the up close look at how wet she was was even better.
“Please,” Wanda whispered. You made eye contact with her and leaned down, pressing a soft kiss right to her clit. She gasped, watching you continue to cover her wet cunt in gentle kisses, holding her breath for what was to come. You were growing impatient with your own game, despite wanting to tease Wanda even further. It was your birthday and you deserved to devour her if that’s what you wanted. So without further hesitation, you licked a strong stripe through Wanda’s folds, causing her to gasp. Carefully you used your thumbs to spread her cunt open, admiring the view and then got to work.
“Oh fuck!” Wanda cried as your lips wrapped around her clit and began to suck. You knew exactly what Wanda liked and you gently sank your teeth into the sensitive bud which caused her to buck her hips and moan loudly. “Fuck! I love when you do that, baby!”
Her breathing was quick as you devoured her dripping cunt, alternating between licks and sucks at her clit and fucking her on your tongue, burying it as deep inside of her pussy as possible. It wasn’t long before Wanda’s thighs were shaking and threatening to close around your head; the grip on your hair was strong as she bucked her hips against your face. “C’mon Wanda, cum for me?”
And that she did. Wanda came hard against your mouth, and you helped her through it with gentle licks and praises. “Fuck, baby girl,” she said breathlessly. “You’ve gotten very good at that!”
You sat up and smiled, your lips and chin glossy with her juices, giving Wanda a minute to collect herself. “Kiss me,” she demanded. You helped her sit up, and your lips joined together, kissing her like you’ll never have another kiss again. Wanda’s hands slid under your shirt, lifting it over your head and then removing your bra. “God I love your tits,” Wanda cooed.
You sighed as Wanda held your breasts in her hands, her hands squeezing and playing with them as she stared. “All yours, Mommy,” you said softly. Wanda nodded, leaning down and taking one of your nipples into her mouth. You gasped at the feeling but loved it nonetheless. Her tongue licked over your nipple slowly, seemingly making sure to cover all of it before taking it into her mouth and sucking diligently. Her other hand was on your other breast, pinching and twisting the other nipple. Your head was thrown back and one hand was tangled in Wanda’s hair, encouraging her to keep going.
It felt like hours had gone by as Wanda all but worshiped your breasts, taking her time to love them with her mouth equally. “Mommy-“
“Yes sweetheart?” Wanda asked, pausing her focus on your tits. You looked down and your nipples were puffy and swollen from the constant affection.
“Need more,” you whispered. “P-please anything I’ll do anything,” you whimpered, just about begging her to touch you.
“You sure are generous today for your birthday, sweet girl,” Wanda teased, groping your breasts again as she watched over your shoulder. “You know…” she started, her hands moving to your underwear slowly. “I don’t have to unwrap anything since it’s not my birthday,” Wanda teased.
“No! No! Please!” You whined, needing her touch.
“Well you know I have a hard time resisting when a pretty girl says please,” she cooed. You nodded slowly and Wanda moved her hands down your body. Her fingers teased the sides of your underwear and your hips lifted automatically, causing Wanda to chuckle. “So needy.”
Wanda grabbed her pen and took a hit; grabbing your jaw with a bit of force so you could shotgun it from her. She helped you lay down on the bed next to her, sitting between your legs and admiring the view.
Your focus was only on the feeling of her hands sliding your underwear down your legs; her nails lightly scratched up the inside of your thighs, sending another shiver down your spine.
Wanda’s fingers went back to torturing your swollen nipples, causing you to let out a whine. It seemed as though the universe was on your side as her fingers drifted between your legs, one hand slid up around your throat and the other began teasing your dripping pussy.
“Oh princess, you are so wet! Is this all for me?!” Wanda teased. You moaned, nodding as the hand around your neck gave a slight squeeze. It was delicious, the lack of oxygen for a moment was going to your brain, making you feel all fuzzy as Wanda had her way with you. “Poor little baby; I’ve barely touched you and you already can’t focus,” she cooed.
“M-mommy,” you choked out.
“Shhhh Mommy’s gonna take care of you, don't worry,” Wanda said quietly, kissing your tummy. Her hands moved to keep your legs spread open and she dove in, wasting no time at all to taste you. Her tongue swirled slowly around your clit before her lips pulled it into her mouth, sucking on it just the way you like. Your hips bucked against her and she pushed you back into the bed.
“Behave,” Wanda said, making eye contact with you as she continued her assault on your cunt.
“Mommy mommy mommy,” you rambled. Wanda knew you were getting close, could tell by the way you rambled and the way she could feel your pussy fluttering beneath her.
“Go ahead, my love. Cum for me,” Wanda cooed. Your head pushed back against the pillows as you came, her tongue slowed down and your breathing was erratic.
“Fuck,” you breathed out shakily.
“Happy birthday, baby,” Wanda said, smiling. She sat up and leaned in to kiss you, stealing your breath all over again. The two of you smiled as she pressed her forehead to yours.
🌚 just dropping in to ask perhaps what stoner wanda would do if you’re having an extremely terrible day at work and just want to go home 😭
sooo… I got a little carried away with this… you’re welcome!!!!
18+ ONLY - smut below the cut!! (oral, nipple play, marijuana use, mommy kink, oral fixation if you squint, squirting, fingering, very slight body worship, let me know if I missed anything!!)
cloud 9 au
“Wanda, please baby I’m so tired,” you whined over the phone on your lunch break.
“Sweet girl you’re never gonna be able to afford to move out if you quit your job!” Wanda said, her voice laced with concern.
“It’s fine, I’ll just live at home forever if it means I don’t have to do this anymore!”
You were in near tears to your girlfriend over the phone, hating that you still had two hours left of your work day. Everything was going wrong today; from incorrect orders to invalid addresses and everything in between. Thankfully today you only had to do your own job and not someone else’s as well.
“You know that’s not what you want, princess. I know you can finish your day. Do it and I’ll have a surprise waiting for you at my house,” Wanda said.
“You should definitely tell me what that surprise is,” you said, trying to get her to spill as always.
“Nope, my lips are sealed. I’ll see you at 5:30 baby,” Wanda said, hanging up the phone. You exhaled and then smiled, realizing at least now you had something to look forward to after your shift. The last two hours of your day happened to fly by despite one or two angry customers over the phone and a mismatched order slip. You were finally clocking out and it felt incredible.
You were so relieved to be finished with your day that you nearly forgot that Wanda had told you there would be a surprise waiting for you once you got to her house. You unlocked the front door with the keypad number she gave you and stepped inside. “Wanda?” You shouted loudly up the staircase.
“Upstairs!!” She shouted back. The house was large so calling people inside usually required a doorbell or the intercom system but you both felt that was silly. You took your time up the stairs and rapped gently on her bedroom door.
“Come in,” Wanda said.
You opened her door, ready to tell her about your day when your eyes beheld a new sight.
“W-wanda.. wow I’m-“
“D’you like it?” She asked, running her hands over her body, your eyes following her every move. She hit her pen as you drank in her body wrapped in lace.
“I love it,” you said deeply. You walked closer to the bed to admire your girl, dark green lace lingerie covering her body. “Is this new?”
“Mhmm.. you like your surprise, baby?”
“Yes,” you said, mesmerized. She handed you her pen and you took a hit as well, watching as the light in the room hit the sequins on the lace just right and she was sparkling. “You look incredible.”
Wanda’s nipples were hard beneath the one piece lace and you couldn’t wait to get your mouth on them. The two of you shared a few more hits and you watched as she started to peel the lingerie off of her shoulders but you stopped her. “Wait! I mean..” you didn’t mean to shout, watching as the brunette startled in her spot. “Sorry baby. Just, please don’t take it off,” you begged lightly.
“Of course my love,” Wanda said, smiling at you. You helped her lay down and you crawled over her, admiring her beautiful eyes and nose and lips and her perfect breasts and her toned tummy and her soft thighs and what was in between them, despite being covered. You pulled the lace down a bit to let her breasts free, kissing each one and taking your time with your mouth on her nipples, listening to her quiet moans and whimpers.
“Sound so pretty, Mommy,” you said, hoping to get Wanda a little more worked up.
“Thank you pretty girl. You make me feel so good, that’s why,” Wanda breathed out after a hit. You kissed down her stomach but over the lace, taking your time and planting extra wet kisses against her skin. You kissed down her thighs, watching them spread open on their own accord.
“So pretty,” you whispered, pressing your thumb against her covered clit and drawing tight circles.
“Please baby,” Wanda begged.
“Mmmm,” you hummed before leaning in and pressing more kisses to the top, inner sides of her thighs, her scent filling your nostrils and you were in heaven. All those thoughts of work were long gone because all you could think about was your girlfriend in front of you. Carefully, you pulled the bit of lace fabric covering her pussy to the side and leaned in for a few soft kisses.
“It’s not nice to tease Mommy,” Wanda warned, slotting her fingers in your hair as you began to go down on her. You took your time, your tongue laving over her clit nice and slow and then moving to her entrance; fucking her on your tongue the best you could.
“Fuck baby!” Wanda moaned loudly as she came, but you didn’t stop. Giving your girlfriend head was quite possibly one of your favorite activities, besides of course when she allows you to have one of her boobs in your mouth while you snuggle.
“Fuck, fuck!” Wanda cried again, her second orgasm arriving much faster than her first.
“One more, Mommy? For me?” You hummed against her. Wanda’s head was thrown back and she nodded the best she could, moaning loudly as you slipped two fingers into her with ease. Your mouth continued on her clit while your fingers curled upward to that special spot, hitting it over and over.
“Oh fuck oh fuck I’m gonna-“
There wasn’t much of a warning before Wanda all but squirted into your mouth. You tried to get as much as you could and you slowly eased your fingers from inside her as she whimpered from the sensitivity. “Holy fuck, Wanda!”
“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to-“
“Do not apologize! I didn’t know you could squirt,” you said, looking at her mischievously.
“I- I didn’t know either,” she said, blushing profusely.
“That was so hot,” you said, leaning in to kiss your girlfriend while both your lips and chin were covered in her. Wanda moaned at the taste of herself and you pulled away, offering your fingers that were just inside of her. You watched as she licked and sucked them clean, keeping a note for later about fingers in her mouth.
“So.. did you like your surprise?” She asked again.
